What Is A HeartBreak?

A Story by Tiffany Cash

We always meet someone that we adore. Some people try extra hard to impress someone they like or that they are attracted to and others just stay who they are and think that that other person should like them for who they are. Something that is amazing is that every single person thinks differently. We feel differently. Some people feel like they can love multiple people and some people feel like there is only one true love out in the world made just for them. I am a hopeless romantic but on the contrary to that, I believe, I have loved multiple times but have not yet come across the man that is my “true love.” I would like to believe that my effort that I have put into relationships goes noticed but only after a week of breaking up it’s like it never existed. Love turns to hate. Happiness turns to anger. Forgiveness turns to revenge. It’s like your heart was once whole and now it is half. Something that scares me is that when do you really know when your heart has been broken? Is it after multiple fights? Is it after you have found your significant other cheating? There is so much pain we endure but when does it come to that point of feeling as if you only have half of a heart? Every day we are supposed to wake up and face the day with 100% and we are supposed to chase our dreams and all of that good stuff people talk about. On the other hand, for the past few days I have felt like not facing the world. I don’t want people to see the weakness in my heart and the sadness in my eyes. I don’t want to walk into a room of memories and break down and cry. It’s hard enough losing someone you love so deeply but having to face the world afterwards is even harder. I lay my phone beside my head while I sleep away the tears. I wake up to check to see if I have any calls or messages. Hoping that I hear from the person who has put a hold on my life. Why do we do that? Why do we want to be with the person who has hurt us so badly? I ask myself that question all the time? We should be running away from that. We should be turning our backs to the negativity and saying f**k it, we are better than this. Instead, we run ourselves into a wall face on. We torture ourselves. We ask questions we know the answers to. We drink liquor to ease the pain. We are we so naïve to see that we are belittling ourselves? But, in my opinion, I need to cry. I need to wonder. I need to search for the answers that no one else was giving me. I wanted to desperately to know why I kept being treated like I was just another girl from a man that once loved me so much. It’s like us women forget that we were once okay without a man. We forget that we will fall in love again. We only focus on the bad because we want to feel that pain for some reason. It’s a cycle of never ending heartbreaks. While we wait so desperately for our Prince Charming.