Something's Gonna Give! By T. Pina

Something's Gonna Give! By T. Pina

A Poem by PENS FOR PEACE /TJ CALIFORNIA
"

A poem about broken relationships

"

We are two very strong headed, unchangeable persons, always clashing with each other in life!

We have both caused so much pain and heartless strife.

We're guilty of holding back each other from progressing on the roads of life.

Yet one thing's sure, in all this turmoil we call a releationship, that seems to always find it's way through our door.

The truth is, that's something's gonna give, we can't endure much more;

 

I truly loathed you for oh so long, yet for the kid's sake I keep quiet and tried to hold on!

Our years together felt like a prison sentence that would never end,

A thousand years of hell that help could never mend.

We can't keep living tit for tat, hoping to survive on a premise false as that.

 

We were never each other's soul mate, that was quite clear from our turbulent start.

 That shouldn't have been a reason, to break each others hearts.

If we don't stop playing these games, hurting with all this pain,

then something's just gonna give, if not we'll both go insane;

 

Didn't my hurtful words, I could never hold back, always cut you down?

 The times you stabed me through my heart with your infidelity,

didn't I patch myself up and try to stay around?

 

I'm not threatening you, hell  I would never do that.

 In all this misery, I'm just stating a true fact.

If we don't turn oursevles around and stop this destructive course,

then all that we sacraficed for will crash and burn.

It will do so with no remorse.

 

Because in the end something's gonna give, mark my words with that;

 Sad to say, like a bridge structurally damage under constant heavy stress;

Something's gonna give, it just alway's does!

© 2008 PENS FOR PEACE /TJ CALIFORNIA


Author's Note

PENS FOR PEACE /TJ CALIFORNIA
The relationship from hell, that we all seemed to have gone through in life!

My Review

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Featured Review

I really like this. I liked the rhyme scheme. My only advice, and it's not a big thing, but if you broke your sentences down, where each one was app the same length. Example..
don't stop playing these games, hurting with all this pain,
then something's just gonna give, if not we'll both go insane;

don't stop playing these games
hurting with all this pain
then something's just gonna give
if not we'll both go insane

Those are just personal preferences, but I think it looks cleaner. Great piece.





Posted 15 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

i like the simple and stright foreward way this is expressed,
nicely done

Posted 15 Years Ago


I knew a Tim Pina in High School. Your Avatar tells me that
you are not he, though. Did you by any chance go to Mission Bay?
For a similar take on these feelings, would you check into my
"Ode To An Un-met Love", then right after, "Fear"?

Posted 15 Years Ago


that is true, we all do go thru that kind of relationship at some point..i like how this
is written..it has a desperate ring, and a yearning that things would have been better.
i like the attempt to understand. A really good write on a situation it is difficult to
write about.

Posted 15 Years Ago


it is so honest, so transparent. I agree, either someone changes or it falls apart, that is guaranteed. Good job.

Posted 15 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
Mel
Great Work! I'm sure you will touch many hearts and minds with this piece.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very nice...our pain paints pictures that also reflect and heal the pain of others. Beautiful!

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Your top reviewer points out the best feature of this impressive poem: read aloud it is an artful dialogue, wrought and expressive.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great Job, expressed with truth and sincerity, I am sure many can relate to the meaning and draw insight.


Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really like this. I liked the rhyme scheme. My only advice, and it's not a big thing, but if you broke your sentences down, where each one was app the same length. Example..
don't stop playing these games, hurting with all this pain,
then something's just gonna give, if not we'll both go insane;

don't stop playing these games
hurting with all this pain
then something's just gonna give
if not we'll both go insane

Those are just personal preferences, but I think it looks cleaner. Great piece.





Posted 15 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

I have been very lucky in my lifetime with one small exception, when it came to love. Married at 16 and divorced at 19. Way too young to even be thinking of a lasting relationship. The hurt was real but perhaps necessary for growth. I have been married this time 39 years this May and even though we have had our ups and downs, especially in these later years of our lives we have been and are happy. I say very lucky, because as I read through this wonderful write I felt my childhood and the arguments that went on between my parents. Everything you described in this write was theirs and MINE and my BROTHERS and it took them 20 years to finally admit to it. The something that is gonna give does happen time and time again in the world around us. Great insite here.

I am sorry it has been awhile since I visited. It seems time marches faster than I do. LOL Someday I will have the time to stay and read more than just one at each visit. Promise. LOL Blessings, Lesa

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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2131 Views
52 Reviews
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Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on July 5, 2008
Last Updated on September 5, 2008

Author

PENS FOR PEACE /TJ CALIFORNIA
PENS FOR PEACE /TJ CALIFORNIA

San Diego, CA



About
Born T. Pina on Feb. 13, 1960 in the South Bronx, New York City. Writing is truly the passion of my soul. The soul is that energy that keeps us alive and connected to the Universe. It is the most.. more..

Writing