Teenage Angst (that maybe can be called adult real life angst)

A Story by Levmada

How loneliness can get way out of hand

I am sad. I know that sad is f*****g simplistic and not really a good start to anything that contains words, but emotion is emotion, it cant be explained through weds like most things in the brain can, it can only be felt like being punched in the gut over and over again, sometimes if you feel too sad it can become a physical feeling, the engulfment of sadness. And no its not beautiful its not romantic its the horror movie you didn't buy a ticket for, when engulfed by this you cant breath each waking moment becomes one in which you are stuck not able to move away from what you are feeling. Your heart turns into a pile of rocks. You cant avoid your heart, that's the f*****g cruel thing about sadness, your heart turn against you, the one thing that you cant avoid, the one thing that has to remain,that has to carry on, leaves you alone, tells you to go f**k yourself. Because when the heart leaves you become an empty vessel, a meat sack that carries your organs and moves you from one meaningless activity to another, because when the heart is gone how can you manage to care about anything, how can anything else in your life work, its the main f*****g thing that does everything that moves everything, every single organ is completely fucked without the heart, meaning every single part of your life is fucked as well, all you can hope for is the day she starts kicking again.