Why me?

A philosophic overview of pain and suffering

I once heard it said we exist in one of three states: we are either preparing to go into a period of trial, we are in the middle of a trial, or we have just come through a trial. There are never satisfactory explanations for human suffering, be it great or small. Even the smallest of difficulties can sometimes seem unbearable to the individual who has been thrust into the crucible that is suffering. It would seem with any degree of hardship weighing on a person, one’s ability to cope is relative to how much strife they are dealing with at that particular moment.

 

 

If it were possible to have perfect balance with problems, we might say that as troubles were to come and go, they would be well spaced apart, allowing adequate time for adjustment, recovery and correction. Unfortunately, we cannot be the masters of our own chastening. While we may occasionally have the luxury of coping with disasters one at a time, more times than not, we have multiple issues swirling about in our lives. The chaos during these periods is a major component of our ability (or inability) to cope and recover from trials.

 

Feelings of overwhelm and doom often surround an individual who is struggling through a myriad of ordeals. There can be a sense of reaching a “point of no return” where he or she may feel complete apathy towards the problem and resists any further urge to deal head on with the issue. Often, someone is handling a number of smaller difficulties at one time and then, almost profanely, they are dealt a catastrophic blow, one such as the death of a family member. The resultant emotions of loss and mourning are so overwhelming the many other things become numbness and collectively, the person teeters on the edge of deep depression.

 

Why must we deal with such pain? Why are we so different from other life forms on this planet? Although there is some evidence that an animal can grieve over the loss of a mate, there is very little proof that this mourning period is something they must endure for months or years on end. Would it be too bold to suggest we have souls? But surely to make that suggestion would beg additional questions - tough questions, the ones which may not be politically correct.  For example, would it suggest intelligent design for one life form to exist which is cognitive of pain and suffering and all other life forms to be excluded from such? And if not created by a master designer, then this ability to reason, realize, and categorize suffering must have 'evolved' from a lower, or more correctly stated, a lesser need. But what need? And, if we were to follow Darwin’s reasoning that we change to survive and not that we survive because of change, then the larger question is for what purpose has our ability to suffer pain evolved at all?

 

I would make the argument that we indeed do have a soul. A soul that can be defined by love and hate, pain and suffering, happiness and sadness, and it is a soul that exists for the benefit of the human to which it belongs. This incredible feature has been earmarked by the creator for a being that has it exclusively from other created life. It is only logical to conclude that if there were no purpose or function for pain and anguish in a lower life form and that they play no role in the 'survivability' of the species, then it must have been purposely placed there by an intelligent designer.

 

But why must we suffer when confronted with trials? Why must there be pain and hurt in the shaping of our psyche? Must we feel pain and if so, what purpose might it serve?

I began to answer these questions by the recollection of a most unlikely memory. It is this story within a story that I would like to share with you.

 

When I was a teenager, my Grandfather and I were involved in competitive pistol shooting. We were both quite accomplished and in obtaining that skill, we had fired ten’s of thousands of rounds of ammunition. We were shooting so much together in fact, that it became a matter of necessity for us to begin handloading our ammunition to save money. The added benefit became an ability to control the quality of the load and thereby increase the accuracy of the shot. As we progressed in our knowledge of loading our pistol rounds, we discovered we could begin to experiment with the load performance by using various bullet shapes which we started casting ourselves. Each bullet was molded from lead and in the beginning, being extreme neophytes, were completely unaware of how purity levels effect a bullet’s strength. Early on, many of our bullets would deform in flight from an inability to cope with the tremendous pressures associated with the discharge of a firearm. Still we continued and on Saturday mornings my Grandfather and I could be found squatting over a small smelting pot on his garage floor, almost entranced, watching various forms of lead, mostly wheel weights scavenged from local tire stores, slowly melt into a brilliant silver liquid.

 

To the untrained eye, the lead looked perfect. It was, however, full of impurity. Impurities in the lead, if not removed, caused the bullets to be weak and depending upon the amount of impurities in them, could cause them to either shatter or become deformed in flight after discharging the cartridge. We found ourselves continually involved in the process melting and re-melting of our lead, in order to obtain the highest quality possible. Once the lead had fully melted, we would add a flux to the mix. Immediately impurity in the lead would rise to the surface where we were quick to skim it off with a small ladle. People were amazed when they visited our little 'factory'. It was quite an operation. We had large containers of lead ingots shelved on one wall. Each container labeled with the details of the lead it held. The hardness, number of times it had been smelted, and other data was all contained in the details. We became so skilled in this art, soon we were casting bullets for specific events we were intending to compete; selecting a lead with a specific hardness or quality that we deemed might give us some competitive edge.

 

This entire process of bullet making was just a memory to me. It never had any significance nor had entered my thoughts for any reason other than to fondly remember my Grandfather.

And then, I read a scripture in the Bible. Malachi 3:3:

 

“And he shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver: and he shall purify the sons of Levi, and purge them as gold and silver, that they may offer unto the Lord an offering in righteousness”

 

I had an epiphany. I began to think of how we had continually reheated our lead in order to achieve purity. Subjecting it to extreme heat and melting it, refining it and each time skimming away the impurity. I remembered how we had inventoried many different grades of lead, some harder and some softer, but each with a specific application. Never the less, all the lead had to be purified, regardless of its final use. It all had to be subjected to the refiner’s fire in order gain structural integrity.

 

And so it is with the human soul. Through our trials and pain the metal of our existence is tempered. The master refiner sits as we are made pure and refined by trials. We are being made ready for future work. Further, it could be said because of our experiences, others might benefit from how we have recovered from them. We who have persevered become an encouragement to those who have found themselves in that crucible of suffering.

 

As I further contemplated this, I began to see not only are our trials and troubles part of the refining process, but also our good and pleasant times. These periods of good and bad are all shapers of the soul. We tend to focus on the trials more because that 'fire' burns us with the memory of pain much deeper than the memories of fair times.

 

In conclusion, the human species will endure pain. The trials will come and although difficult at the time, it is where our existence is forged. It is the crucible where our strength is ground out. Our weakness is made perfect through them. It is the why in 'Why me?'.
 

Reviews

[Jeanne Broome]

This really spoke to my heart. In my life I have endured one trial after another..and I have gotten to the point that I look forward to fighting through to the end. I have learned also of the strength accomplished through the trials. I don't necessarily like going through trials...but it has forged who I am....and has made me see the why in the Why Me? Very good writing Todd. I love when you talk of your experiences and family.

[Hapless Tiki]

Thank you for the submission to my little "contest" Mr. Bailey. As I usually do, I will make some comments about both the form and the content, be open to it if you will, prepare to enter the 'crucible of criticism'! ;)

The writing:
There are three issues which stuck out to me as the most important for you to work on: sentence structure, conjunctions/lists, and prepositions. It seems that you have a tendency to run on sentences to the extent that even the author forgets the correct tenses, pluralization, or subject/object grammatical relationships. Some of the more egregious examples can be found in this paragraph:

"There can be a sense of reaching a “point of no return” where he or she may feel complete apathy towards the problem and resists any further urge to deal head on with the issue. Often, someone is handling a number of smaller difficulties at one time and then, almost profanely, they are dealt a catastrophic blow, one such as the death of a family member. The resultant emotions of loss and mourning are so overwhelming the many other things become numbness and collectively, the person teeters on the edge of deep depression."

For examples: "resists" should be "resist", "someone" and "they" on either side of that "and" are awkward together, and "numbness and collectively" appear here as part of a single list, when your intent is that the "and" functions as a conjunction here. There are many more examples of this sort in the essay, as I say, I would concentrate on those three issues I mentioned above.

Content:
Many people would disagree with the fatalism and victimhood you embrace from the outset.

"There are never satisfactory explanations for human suffering", "Unfortunately, we cannot be the masters of our own chastening", "Why must we deal with such pain?"

There are useful alternative conceptions of human suffering, most obviously the Buddhist, which do not view "pain" as you seem to. Perhaps you would consider some of these alternative conceptions?

Though you are clearly familiar with analogies, as this essay is one long analogy, I did not notice you address that the single word "pain" as applied to grief and emotional suffering is itself a tiny analogy to physical pain. When you (very dis satisfactorily) attempt to discuss evolution this omission becomes even more glaring. "categorize suffering must have 'evolved' from a lower, or more correctly stated, a lesser need. But what need?" Some readers may wonder why an account of this 'other need' might be an exaptation of physical pain...

There are many difficult to swallow pills here, which if you want your work to be read as "philosophy" you would have to spell out. It does not immediately follow, even if we grant you that human beings are the only true 'sufferers' on the planet, that we therefore 'have a soul', and even if we did, it does not follow from a 'soul' that 'there is a creator', let alone to give that 'creator' any properties.

"I would make the argument that we indeed do have a soul." Do not tease us, sir! What better place than a philosophical essay to make this argument? However, even though you intimate that you 'would' make the argument, you do not attempt to do so here. To be taken seriously as philosophy (which I only commit you to because you submitted this to a philosophical essay contest) you will have to actually argue, not just assert that you would.

[HoorayForUnderdog]

Very well written and thought provoking article.

Just another religious outlook concerning how "we had continually reheated our lead in order to achieve purity"...I imediately thought of reincarnation...how souls have to be re-born continuously until they reach purity. Now I do not claim to owned by any one religious philosophy but it interests me that most religions have common threads such as this one.

Oh...and by the way...I do believe that animals that are higher up in the food chain have emotions just as complicated as ours...we just don't speak their languages. Why did emotions evolve? Perhaps to help with group bonding...animals and then people who live in interconnected communities had higher survival rates than a lone hunter/gatherer.

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Oh CT, I have not read a more inspiring piece as this one. I have always said that how we to know the feelings of complete joy if not for the pain. For if not for the pain, how would one know what great joy feels like. I have known great loss, suffering and pain when my child died of cancer, but I have also known pure joy when my first grandson became a survivor of cancer. He lost his right eye at the age of nine months and will graduate highschoold this year. Cancer has taken its toll in this family. Thank you for reminding me that I have been tried by fire and in that fire my faith in God has only grown stronger each and every trial. I hope you have your writings rated because this one get a 100%

[Norma J. Jessee]

Todd, this article has brought tears to my eyes, and joy to heart as well. I love this article as it shows you are in touch with you innermost feelings and that you have a love for God as well. So many people have lost faith in God because they have found no satisfactory answer to this question. The Bible assures us that the suffering we see around us is not caused by God. The disciple James wrote: "When under trial, let no man say; "I am being tried by God " For with evil things God cannot be tried nor does he himself try anyone." (James 1:13) That being so, God could not have caused the numerous hardships plaguing mankind. He does not bring trials upon people to make them fit for life in heaven, nor does he make people suffer for evil deeds they supposedly committed in a past life.(Romans 6:7)

The Bible describes God as being "very tender in affection and merciful. (James 5:11) It proclaims that "God is a lover of justice" (Psalm 37:28; Isaiah 61:8) He is not vindictive. He compassionately cares for his creatures and gives all of them what is best for their well-being.(Acts 14:16,17) Then where does all the suffering come from ? You may tkae me off your friends list after reading this review as I am relying on the Bible to comment on your article.And as you are a new friend I do not know how you feel about religious views. So I'm taking a chance.

God placed the first human pair, Adam and Eve, in a paradise called the garden of Eden and commanded them to be fruitful, become many and fill the earth and subdue it. Our first parents enjoyed perfection and had the prospect of seeing the whole earth become a paradise occupied by a perfect human family living in lasting peace and happiness. That was Gods purpose in creating the earth and humankind. Adam and Eve were expected to obey one command, to refrain from eating from "the tree of the knowledge of good and bad," If they had obeyed God's law, there would have been no suffering to mar human life. By obeying they would have demonstrated their love for God and their loyalty to him. But things didn't turn out that way. Urged by Satan, Eve ate fruit from the tree and later Adam also partook of the forbidden fruit. A lot of people do not see the seriousness of what happened. All they see is the fact that Adam and Eve ate the fruit and were punished but there was a deeper implication.

Satan was attacking God's position as the Most High. By saying ,"You positively will not die" the devil contradicted God's words, "You will positively die,". Satan's further words implied that God was keeping Adam and Eve ignorant of the possibliity of becoming like God, thus not needing Him to decide what was good and bad. Satan's challenge therefore brought into question the right and validity of God's position as the Universal Sovereign.

Satan also insinuated that people would remain obedient to God only as long as obeying God was to their advantage. In other words human integrity was brought into question. Satan charged that no human would voluntarily remain loyal to God.If one reads the first two chapters of the book of Job you can gain insight into the reason for human suffering and why God permits it.

What happened in the garden of Eden and to the man Job, however, has a deeper implication. The issues Satan raised involve all mankind, including us today. God's name was maligned, and his sovereignty was challenged. The uprightness of God's creation, man, was called into question. these issues had to be settled. So , during all human history, Satan has had a free hand to work out his schemes of domination over mankind. Among other things he has wielded influence over the political powers and has promoted religions that subtly direct worship to him rather than to God. Thus the Devil has become " the god of this system of things," and he is called " the ruler of this world." ( 2 Corinthians4:4; John 12:31) Indeed, " the whole world is lying in the power of the wicked." (1John 5:19) But this doesn't mean that Satan has proved his claim that he could draw all mankind away from God. While permitting Satan to remain in existence, God has proceeded to carry out his own purpose.

Since Satan is the ruler of this world and the god of this system of things, he and those on his side are responsible for the present condition of human society and all the misery that mankind has suffered . God's permitting wickedness and suffering has proved that independence from God has not brought about a better world. It has also proved that Satan has not been able to turn all mankind away from God. It has also provided proof that only Jehovah God, the Creator, has the ability and the right to rule over mankind.
And only God will come to our rescue and fulfill his original purpose.

Sorry this review is so long but I couldn't explain in less words and I loved your article so much that I just had to say this to extend it a little further.
Keep on writing articles like this. we need more of them. I wrote one one entitled (Relationships) that you might want to read. (if you're still my friend after reading this long review)

[Gandré]

I just loved this stanza: "And so it is with the human soul .........etc........"

I really enjoyed your deep philosophical thought. you are so right. thank you for englightening those self-blaming issues. oh yes, how often I did it, too.

beautiful and important writing. I also like that you are again mentioning your grand father. I know he was a pilot. very strong character.

be well, Todd. write on. Looking forward to the next thought. l.gandr�

[Mark D. Chevalier]

What doesn't kill you can only make you stronger. My grandfather always believed that. I don't know if the pain and ability to grieve can definitively answer the question that is the soul?
But intrinsically I agree with the foundation you lay out. This was a very interesting piece of work, and I usually only read fiction, but I found your style compelling and kept reading, almost like I was studying philosophy in College again.
I specifically enjoyed the reference to metals, and the heating and cooling purification process. Which would beg the question. What grade are we?
Nice work Sir!
M

[[untitled]]

Todd this is a superb piece, every word of which I agree with. I have been lucky enough to have learned this early on in my search, perhaps in my late 20s. Yet, still I fell as the dross being burned out at times as purification takes place. I thoroughly enjoyed each well written word.

[T]

This held so much meaning for me and is very true to my own beliefs...It is apparent through the years of experience that we grow into more "enlightened" beings (hopefully) and it could be that we return again to go on to the next lessons we are meant to learn. I also think people sometimes choose the paths or people in their lives for the lessons (gifts) that they need from them. A good book to read is Richard Bachs "The adventures of a reluctant messiah" which is an interesting way of looking at life. This was a great read this morning thanks for sharing it with me.

[Sydelle Houston]

I liked this Todd, you put a nice balance of fact and emotion together. My grandmother used to say in every life some rain must fall. Sometimes you have an umbrella and sometimes you get soaked. My grandfather used to say you bring karmic baggage with you to every life. If you never unpack it in a past life, it just adds to the weight of what you go through in the present life. Yes we grow through pain and we also grow when we share our pain with others who are going through the same circumstances. Excellent essay on live and the trials and tribulations within.

[Muddy B.]

YOU KNOW SOMEONE RECOMMENDED
THAT I READ THIS
AND IT TOOK ME 2DAYS TO GET TO IT
OMG IS ALL I CAN SAY
IT REALLY SPOKE TO ME
I FELT LIKE THIS WAS WRITTEN FOR ME
THIS PEACE HOLD TRUTHS
LIKE NONE I HAVE EVER READ
ITS WONDERFUL
CONTINUE THE AMAZING WORK
I LOOK FORWARD TO READING MORE
WITHOUT A FIRM RECOMMENDATION