Working Title - Demon Novel

Synopsis for my manuscript, for which I am currently preparing the submission package. Please let me know if: 1) the plot is clear 2) the synopsis is stream-lined and makes sense.

Synopsis Rough Draft #2 �" (One Page)

 

NAYA, 17, has a family that is far beyond dysfunctional.  Not only are her adopted mother, brother, and sister powerful demons, they’ve also been plotting to murder her for several centuries.  She is a major threat to their scheme involving the conversion of humans into demons.  Mainly because of Naya’s own immense power: she can go into souls, and save humans by creating hybrids not under her family’s control.  As a unique hybrid, she also possesses the ability to combine fire with other elements using magic.  Raised in the spiritual realm by her surrogate father, then sent to Earth to live amongst mankind, she has several hundred reincarnations under her belt. 

 

She used to think humans were inferior to supernatural beings and felt no compassion for them.  However, her feelings change after dark ceremonies surface where demons are evoked from the spiritual realm, then thrust into unsuspecting humans.  Naya feels guilty about standing on the sidelines and watching her family takeaway man’s freewill for so long.  She feels compelled to use her powers to protect humans, not dominate them.

 

She is constantly trying to thwart her family’s plans with the help of her two closest allies, 17-year-old demon/hybrids she rescued from her family years ago.  Despite her efforts, the demon invasion spreads to the surrounding towns and cities, and only one human, CLARA MAE CONNELLY, is left in the high school.  Things change when three new kids arrive: THE CARTERS, two brothers and a sister that sense something odd about their town.  Naya watches them closely to see if they align with her enemies.  If they do, she will have to destroy them, along with her family.  However, she grows conflicted when she realizes the older brother is actually her true love from a past life.  Naya becomes entangled in a love triangle involving him and her sister, who is merely setting a trap to gain Naya’s power. 

 

Naya eventually learns why the last human left in school is in such danger.  She is one of the mysterious “Crowned Ones”, humans with abilities that can cross time and space.  If the girl is seized by Naya’s family, they will have unlimited power at their disposal.  Unfortunately, Naya falls into her sister’s trap and loses control of her own abilities, narrowly escaping with her life.  However, she must go into hiding for the safety of her friends.  She plans to reemerge only when it is time for the final battle, since she will be stronger by then.  Naya realizes that one of the new kids is also a Crowned One, and enlists his help in defeating her family before going into hiding.

 

She resurfaces after finding out two of the three Carters have been taken by her sister and turned into demons.  She uses her abilities to change them into hybrids, but has a deeper problem: her mother successfully captures Clara and is ready to claim the girl’s immense power.  Naya dives into Clara’s polluted soul, with no choice but to face a seemingly unstoppable foe that possesses unlimited power.  During the intense battle, Naya is unable to fight much longer.  She understands that in order to beat someone so powerful, she must unleash the ultimate attack, one that kills everyone in the vicinity, including her and Clara.  The sacrificial action is successful, and Naya wakes up to find her and Clara in the “Plane of Non-Existence”, surrounding by darkness. 

 

It is here that Naya meets her real parents for the first time.  Her father is one of the Seven Archangels of Heaven and her mother, known as “the Great Abomination”, is half demon and half human.  Her surrogate father and his brother arrive as well to assist.  Together, Naya’s spiritual family uses divine intervention to send Naya and Clara back to their bodies, explaining that they still have much to learn in their current life.  When Naya wakes up again she is back in her body and ready to face a new age, one where she is a major player in the creation of a new race: the hybrids.

 

 

 

Author's Note

If you do not like the story, I understand that this genre is not for everyone. What I am asking for is whether or not this synopsis has clarity issues, and if it is written in a boring tone. The challenge was condensing a 600+ page manuscript into a 1-page summary. Thank you so much!

Reviews

[foilist13]

First off, you need to proofread this. You cannot send this off to a publisher with a bunch of typos.

The plot makes sense so far as I understand what's happening. It's really going to come down to the quality of your writing to determine it gets accepted or not. I wouldn't describe anything as an attack or a move. Call it a spell, or something different. In my experience people are put off by anything that makes your book sound like a video game. Just keep that in mind and it should all work out just fine.