In wonder

Sweet stooping branches, you lie soft from will-owing trees, in the twilight

tonight as the amber flies flicker, high above; our sunshine stars.

You catch a peek, where together, beauty are caught in awe, two stand,

one.   

Reviews

[What happened to simple..]

Hey, thank you for reviewing =D yeah, I see what you mean, however I went for the 'you' lowercase, to be him, and the 'You' uppercase to be the reader or in the case of this poem the person watching. It really just flowed out more than anything, and the 'beauty are caught in awe', the are for plural, two of them, but yep I totally see your point! Thank you =D

[G. Cedillo]

I'm wondering on this one too. The language is a bit odd, jumbly, but it works well -- it rushes out, it's comes out so suddenly and twisted, it fit the mood I think. And then, it ends just as suddenly, "one." I want more, actually.
I think this can be smoothed out a bit - some little mistakes, "beauty is caught in awe," the "You" in the first line gets a little tangled with the "you" in the third, etc. - but once revised will make a fine, tight poem.

thanks for sharing,
gc

[Emily B]

oh, oh, this is one of those things that should be read often

glad I wandered on it