She

It was her kiss
that sent a shaft of light
into confounding blackness where the dead
would hold their rites of cold fraternity--
as if the border of that town were there
to mark a private paradise.

 

Her kiss, I found enough
to counteract those graceless thoughts
that swept across the meadow of my mind
like fresh cold winds
intruding on an evening stroll.
I sought her there, of course;
I needed something cosmic,
something of the world outside
to pull me from the pit of disillusionment.

 

I think she knew that there would be
no waking in the idle laughter that she heard--
no sighing softness under her caress,
(should she be bold enough to touch cold flesh)
and so she took my hand, and then she kissed me!
Though I knew her not, her warmth,
the fullness of her lips
brought joy beyond exuberance, for then
the blistered morn in radiance
could magnify the sun,
while she and I and all the blessed earth
were one.
                            ~

 

Reviews

[Ken Simm.]

I think I find the flow to this the most captivating. It seems the words have always been there and just need you to brush away the dross.

[Thomas Skahill]

I think line 4's "rites of cold fraternity" is a particularly inspired line. Personally it reminds me a scene in "Requiem for a Dream" by Hubert Selby Jr. where a group of junkies get off in a morgue, mostly because of the etherial escapism I sense here and an undertone of some sensual passion.

[Dean]

sensual passion, I have aplenty. That may not be enough

[emmajoy]

'She' seems to wander your thought in different guises.. or with less or more from time to time. Perhaps your imagination soars at thoughts of what MIGHT happen rather than what has happened? Your phrasing is, as always, carefully featherlike as if you tiptoe between stanzas, touching and enhancing lines, ' .. counteract those graceless thoughts ~ that swept across the meadow of my mind ~ like fresh cold winds ~ intruding on an evening stroll.' The third stanza is warm to the touch but gloriously subtle. You truly know how to write 'subtle'!

[Dean]

Many thanks! It has been so long since I have seen you here. I appreciate you and your fine work so very much.

[emmajoy]

Forgive me please, our time of day and night differ; I have friends from all over and try to review people as and when i can. However, i fall down on that giant task so badly, Dean. Kind words from you, as always, thank you.

[A. Amos]

I sought her there, of course;
I needed something cosmic,
something of the world outside
to pull me from the pit of disillusionment.

Your defination of your need and your urge your want, i have to admit you have magically mentioned above. I just loved it

[Dean]

Hey, thanks a lot!

[A. Amos]

You're welcome my friend

[Gleb Zavlanov]

I love the splendid imagery you incorporate into this poem, which sweeps with power, grace, passion and emotion. It was as if the whole world changed once you touched those lips. Wonderful work!

[Sami Khalil]

I could be wrong but I feel you are comparing nature to a lovely and radiant lady with her soft caresseses or just imaging a real lady that she stole a kiss that you have never forgotten. And the reason I say that that she became one with the blessed earth in life as well as in death...Excellent...:)...

[Dean]

you always find something good to say. Thank you.

[Sami Khalil]

My pleasure , sir...:).......................

[J. J. Nightingale]

I never had a kiss that made me soar ..
Love isn't always brighter than the sun
Sometimes it's comfortable, and soft
A spooning trusting time ..

As usual, you are wonderful .. and I pause to ponder such happenings .. mm

Jazz xoxo

[Dean]

not sure I did either if you want to know the truth, :-) Not all my poetry reflects personal happenings...not that that is bad.

[J. J. Nightingale]

..♥♥..................................

[J. J. Nightingale]

One wonders........are you still around...................?

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

One small correction: "the fulness of her lips" should be "the fullness of her lips"

I could weep for the beauty in the words "the blistered morn in radiance could magnify the sun, while she and I and all the blessed earth were one."

For me, these words embody the spiritual effulgence which I have personally felt when being truly in love with someone. I realize that you write of the kiss sweeping thoughts of disillusionment to the wind, but for me it surpasses this.

Being in love is spiritual and transcends this world. It lifted me so high that, while my body holds me here to this earth, I soar inside. Having tasted the sweetness of such a kiss, I’d rather live with the memory of it than settle for mere lips on lips or flesh on flesh with no love in between.

Beautiful!

[Dean]

of course you would! And thanks once more for the correction. I have always considered my poetic errors to be stupid, and for some reason, I am finding more of them these days. Must be senility setting in.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

You're welcome, and I don't think it's senility at all. It's the rush to plant the words before the rainstorm pushes in that causes such mistakes. We want them planted, so that when the rain comes, they will flower into a bouquet of fragrant petals.

[Dean]

In my own weak defense, there is an alternate approved spelling with only the one 'l' but I believe that I was thinking for some reason, of the word "fulsome."

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

:-) No need to defend. It's always as you will it to be.

[Dean]

unfortunately not. I didn't will this one

[Lydia Shutter]

A kiss from the right person can change a dark day to a sunny one....can bring warmth to a blizzard....can bring a smile to tearful eyes. It is as if the world stops when the right lips meet. Nothing else matters and only that moment exists. Your words made me think of this......and also of a person who thinks he is not worthy of love till he is kissed. Just lovely....all the thoughts you sparked! Lydi**

[Dean]

Thanks. If erotic suggestion is indeed your cup of tea (which it seems to be)--you might like my "Apotheosis of a Lover" among my submissions here.
-Dean

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

A kiss -- the right kiss -- can give wings to any mortal man or woman. I have felt the butterflies and tasted the sweetness of transcendence, but it has never lasted for me, unfortunately. You have penned this beautifully, my friend. So many images and concepts to latch on to; I shall be mulling this one over for some time--added to my favs. :)