Letter on the Last Friday in March

After my visit, came this letter

After my heart stopped, you found the poems

I had written you, never given

 

Years before, is there meaning

In such delay, I never lost enough

But love, I never hoped enough

 

But to love, I never felt the wondrous sea

But as the blanket of the stars

Many sails at rest, many little

 

Drops of silence to the west

After my visit of loving

Came the reimbursed delight

 

Of never stopping being grateful

Though I found no triumph, no shore

The morns are just meeker

 

Than years before, the fields less scarlet

The hours less prepared, more careless

So knelt in prayers to Spring

What of the frequency between us. 

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

See, I disagree with Trigorin, I don't think that the topic is generic at all. I mean, everything has already been written in some way or another, unless you're writing about some JUST discovered algea on Mars or something, so to say that writing about love and loss has been "done" is correct, but to call it "generic"...no. Anyway, with that out of the way, I like this one. It reminds me a little of the piece I wrote about burning letters. There is an innate longing here that is really quite new and fresh. The wording is beautiful and the emotion is sensory. Well done.

[Sympatico]

Well I did write about smartdust, recently :P That hasn't been tried by Trigorin I don't think....

[Sympatico]

Yes it's about poets who fell in love over a long distance and wrong many poems to each other, some secret and some shared.

[Sympatico]

*wrote

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Read some of Trigorin's poetry...I'm not saying it's not good, but the topics are in no way "absolutely new"...lol

As for your piece...I sort of figured that was what it was about.

[Sympatico]

Been there done that, I find his honest reviews amusing though, though I imagine his avatar to be a very frightening RAT!

[quinfinn]

a poser and a turdburglar

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I can't quite figure out what it is, actually...and it's not that I haven't tried...

[Sympatico]

can we agree it's scary!

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

It reminds me of that commercial they had on for a while for the Quizno's Subs...with the smashed rat thing that would sing and dance...I don't know if scary is the word I would use; perhaps morbidly entertaining.

[Sympatico]

i'm in the mood to gossip!

[quinfinn]

i think this is great. just because some over inflated ego visits your write and says it's generic doesn't mean it is. i am always happy to see writers expressing themselves honestly and i applaud your efforts to do so. this is writerscafe, an avenue for us to explore our talents...not to be slammed by puffed up self important buffoons who begin almost every review they do with "not bad"....when it becomes a publisher's clearing house i'm sure someone who actually has some weight around here will let us know. very good write!

[Trigorin]

Not bad. You put a lot of emotion into this piece and while its topic is fairly generic and done, you manage to make it interesting and hold the reader's attention. Well done.

[Sympatico]

wow knowing how you review, this is praise, I think!