How to Survive Your First Blind Date

A how-to

There is nothing more terrifying than stepping in front of your closet and not knowing what to wear on an important event. Except perhaps something like going out with a complete stranger to a restaurant to endure a two hour awkward conversation, though your friends assure you that he or she is “perfect” for you. Though there is beauty and a challenge in being able to get through your first blind date experience with grace and letting the person see your true self.  This is being written to help the “first-timers” get through their first incident with said grace and as little as the awkward silence to endure as possible.  The first thing to pay mind to is the setup; do not place hatred on the married couples in your life for their good intentions. Do take a moment to think about who is directing your love life however. You know your own dating criteria and the setter upper should know about the person that the blind date is with. Are they a single parent or only in town for a weekend? If they do not match your must-haves, then do not go through with the set up; there is no point to go through that uncomfortable situation if it can be avoided at any cost. Do pay attention to the details that your friend may have already spilled to the other person; so don’t fret about telling those little details about your life, like the recent break up or a never-ending case of giggling you have had since the fifth grade. The next step is setting up an exchange before the date.  Whether it is a text message, email, letter, or Morse code, keep the swap brief.  The one I suggest is drinks before dinner; plan to meet in a fairly popular place that you have visited but isn’t you and your friends usual spot. This way you can know what to wear and you will be comfortable with the environment. Once more, I suggest a place with tables and chairs near the bar, so that way you and your date can go off and talk without having to share your conversation with the bartender.  Keep dinner plans as well afterwards to a place nearby without reservations so that way if the pre-dinner chat doesn’t go as you planned you can still get that quick escape route out. Now comes the dinner, that thing that seems a lot like a job interview but is covered up as “romance”.  It is never a cinch, but there is no need to stress at this point. Easy for me to say as the writer you say, well it is indeed. The more dates you go on, the easier it will become nevertheless it is still not a second nature to be judged by a stranger in a romantic setting. Invite a friend over for prep time, stand on your head, do whatever it takes to calm your nerves. The one thing to avoid at all costs is being late. There is nothing like that to destroy your “dating cool”; so arrive early, order your drink, and bring an ice breaker along. I prefer to bring something like a newspaper or a magazine. It gives the other person an opportunity to ask a question when they arrive, such as “Are there any interesting articles?” This takes us to the conversation portion of the date, the fourth step to a successful blind date. As much a fake resume is interesting, this is the time to truthful, not fluff yourself up. Those awkward pauses do not have to be in play; keep with classic starters like new bands, movies, that new restaurant in town or even pets you own.  Although we are moving into 21^st century, do avoid sex, politics, and religion on the first date; but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t disagree with the person on an opinion or something they stated. Feel free to do so; it actually encourages a healthy chat, though if it becomes too tense, change to a different topic after a moment’s pause. Be wary of your body language during the course of your tête-à-tête. If you finding your heart doing the routine of pitter patter, do the pearly white flash, the old hair toss, to show that you are interested. If you are not clicking, or no sparks beneath the surface, then show that as well; do not however come across as hostile and judgmental, you don’t want the person to feel attacked. The final step is the closing to the evening, or better known as the check.  The simple thing to do is split the check based on what the two of you got to eat and drink and the tip as well. The only case in which it is fine for the other person to pay for the check is when there is a second date in the future. If even after insisting you pay and they just will not give up the check, my favorite line to close the date is “Alright, but I’m picking up the tab on the next date.”  How you close the evening after the check is your decision, but make sure it’s something you will remember in the morning and not regret. The overall point is to be yourself and to remain calm. This way your true self can shine through and dazzle your date without you having to try hard and make the date a breeze as well as a blast if you follow these simple steps.