The lost river...

We decided to break the wall

from both the sides.

By the time we could make

some major damages to it,

our parts of river started gushing through the gaps.

And suddenly we realized ourselves

left amidst the remnants of an archaic wall.

We expected a united river

when the wall is broken, but

the whole river in turn got drained out.

I saw myself sitting on an island,

surrounded by a deep sea.

For you it was an oasis,

surrounded by a great desert.

There were the tidal noise and the desert silence

existing in between us.

‘Do you feel that we became silent

all of a sudden?’

‘No, I just think that we were more expressive

when the wall was there’

‘So, how do you feel now?’

‘I feel to be on the edges,

like a person trying to sleep

in a snake-entered house,

knowing a part imperfectly’

‘Hmm…’

‘How do you feel?’

‘I do feel to be on the edges,

but like a person on the top of a mountain

below a moon-entered sky,

watching the whole perfectly’

‘What’s the difference?’

‘I don’t know about the differences,

but there is a similarity…’

‘Hmm…?’

‘…that neither of us can

step down further’

,..

Reviews

[audrie]

It sounds like there was a breakdown of communication after the wall broke and all of the hidden truths came out. Its better knowing than not knowing in the end

[Swaroop Manikandan]

of course :-)

[priya]

Thought-provoking. It reminds me of my own past where I had to maintain distance from the person I loved in order to alleviate his pain. It brings back old memories. It was a good poem.

[Swaroop Manikandan]

when it happens, it just sweep through the whole of one's being...

[Wynter Page]

I like this! Very well described and it flows wonderfully

[Swaroop Manikandan]

thanks a lot for finding the flow...

[Cahjli Symes]

A beautifully structured poem both visually and emotionally

[Swaroop Manikandan]

thank you Cahjli for stopping by and the review...

[escherflight]

Your work has such a philosphical focus. The final realisation 'neither of us can step down further' - this would work as a study of a personal realtionship, but could also be intgerpreted as political, commenting on the relationship between two different nations who are alongside geographically but very different culturally.

[Swaroop Manikandan]

very true dear friend...

[Matching Socks]

I had a long distance relationship once.
We fell in love in a brief moment of being together, we nurtured the relationship through the airwaves.
The longing became so great that we just had to be together again.
Yet when we did, it was not what we had hoped for.
This poem reminds me of that.

[Swaroop Manikandan]

it feels so warm that it reminds you of that... life is so interesting that it keeps coming back with its own strange familiarity . . .

[Matching Socks]

Indeed....

[Eve Ola]

There were the tidal noise and the desert silence
existing in between us..

very nice poem. welldone

[Swaroop Manikandan]

thanks my friend for the review...

[Ayushi]

Sometimes a little distance and limitations are good for the sake of relationship but we obviously don't realize that..
Great write :)

[Swaroop Manikandan]

true my dear friend... thanks for the review...

[Namrata]

I love this poem, the best I have read from you.

[Swaroop Manikandan]

Thanks Namrata... that's very warm...

[Gurleen Saluja]

nicely penned.. comparisons done well.. and the similarity is also well displayed :)

[Swaroop Manikandan]

Thank you Gurleen...

[Gurleen Saluja]

you're welcome :)