The little ghost

I died on Oak Grove Lane 200 years ago. I lived inside of a small two-story wood house, I mainly stayed inside my room. It was a nice blue room painted for me by my mom; I wondered where she was these days.
I had died by a house fire, I was the only one that did. My mom got out carrying my little sister Grace. The fire spread to my lungs that night, I had been dead asleep in my bedroom.
My mother tried to rescue me but I told her to get the baby. My father had been at work again, I thought I could escape out the window but it had been sealed shut.
My mother had Grace and some things she grabbed me
"Arthur Hurry!"

I tried to keep up with her, though I was ten. We ran down the stairs the fire had engulfed the kitchen; I was coughing hard I could barely see.
I started wheezing and collapsed as we reached the bottom floor my mother, holding Grace picked me up and bared me to her night gown.
I felt the cotton of her night gown and heard the neighbors yelling for water. I felt someone take me their hands were rough and big
"Boy wake up."

I opened my eyes not to the voice but a bright light
"Arthur come here son. "
I said no my family needs me around and my father would be ma's if I did not go to work tomorrow. My mother would be home taking care of Grace as I sold papers for Mr. William and My father the local blacksmith would hammer away at his job.
The light hummed and said I could stay here till I was ready. The light went away and I was standing in my yard no longer in my pjs; I wore my daily attire.
My mother had decided to breeche me once I turned 8 so I wore a skelton suit
I looked around. I saw all the men gathering around with their hats off.
I walked to them I saw my friends Elijah and Thomas I waved yet Elijah was holding his mother's nightgown.

I soon acknowledge everyone was sad. I made my way through the crowd as my father had made it and so had the two. Physician; Doctor Adams who helped me when I was sick last summer.
He held his head holding the shoulder of my father
"Leon, I am sorry so sorry."
"Glenn, what will that do for Arthur."
I tried to tug on his trousers yet no response, then I saw it my body I was in my blue long johns with smoke on my face. My mother was crying over me with my aunt Jane holding Grace.

Then I looked up at the sky wondering what I had just done. I still wonder that at times looking out the window in my old room.

Reviews

[Philip Muls]

Well done Raylene. A nice fragment which could easily become a longer thing.

I like the tone of the dialogue, like in 'Arthur come here son.'

[Raylene]

Thank you :)

[C. Rose]

favorite line: fire spread to my lungs

It took a second reading to realize he dreams he died in a house fire, is awakened, falls back asleep - and then I'm confused again. I don't understand the line "decided to breeche me once I turned 8 so I wore a skeleton suit"

Describing the setting, such as the grass, sky, tombstones at a funeral or the pillow and blanket when he half wakes up will help readers follow this story.

[Raylene]

oh its a fashion term for the time