A Game Of Cards

A quick poem I wrote from the perspective of playing cards. It is written in forward and reverse order of card hands, with Aces being high. 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,J,Q,K,A,K,Q,J,10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2

A deck

Was shuffled around

In true casino fashion.

Back and forth they flew.

Through quick hands the cards fell.

Memory of their lives before was lost;

The order they knew had been shuffled away.

The cards yelled goodbyes while being split into groups.

All previously known inside of that little box was forgotten.

Whatever happened to the way things were before the change?

Hands touched them, handling them roughly while fanning them out.

Names were called by voices unknown: Two, three and four.

Sometimes friends would visit from the mixed up pile down below.

Slowly more confusion set within their flat, white, cardboard minds.

Then they started being slammed on wood with identical friends,

And then another and a fourth joined these duo piles.

Together were the happy four in some resemblance of before.

Another quartet joined in and soon all were there.

They knew that though change isn't always wanted,

They always have the box as home.

From then on they stayed happy,

Even when leaving the box,

For life is just

A game of

Go Fish.

Author's Note

This is second real poem I've written, so I really appreciate criticism and feedback.

Reviews

[Mark MacDonald]

Let me suggest you use the phrase 'the deck' rather than 'a deck.' A small detail certainly, but the definitive article is more specific. The lines: "Memory of their lives before was lost;The order they knew had been shuffled away." seem to declare the central theme of the poem, which I will assume is change. Change is one of the fundamental themes of poetry in nearly all cultures. I think you might want to concentrate more on specific cards themselves, especially the face cards. Do the King and Queen of Hearts fall out of love? Etc. Great ending.

[Constance Payne]

I love the way this flows in the card deck fashion.
So much like life in the reality that it is.
I like the reference of the box as "home" as our home is the place we are safest and it is true that cards are safer in the box than in the hands of someone.
Very nicely done, interesting format.

[Houston Ellsworth]

This was a fun poem! i would try to strip down the sentences and take out some of the filters. Words like Sometimes, always: instead of stating "they knew that though change isnt always wanted" try to convey that through imagery.. i love the idea of the cards yelling goodbye.. it gives them a humanistic quality allowing the reader to relate more to this abstact idea. Good job!