Chapter Eighteen

A distraught Emily has a heart to heart with Dolly

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

“Ye gods and demons! What's happened Emily? Please God, not Jen?” Dolly sagged to the ground in front of me, not wanting, but waiting to hear the worst news of all. His knees were in the slimy puddle of curry sauce, but he seemed to neither notice nor care.

“It's Daniel!” I managed to croak out.

Dolly scrambled up, pulling me up with him. The look of dread on his face had been replaced by one of anger.

“I knew he'd end up breaking your heart! The hot and hunky ones always do.” He inserted his door key in the lock and opened the front door. We entered our shared hallway, Dolly muttering under his breath “all show, no soul.”

“It's not like that. I broke his heart” I told him. “Daniel proposed and I said no!” I buried my head on Dolly's chest, oblivious to the fact that my tears were soaking the peacock blue tee he still wore. My BFF enfolded me in a bear-hug; but even though my tears fell uncontrollably, I had a feeling of deja-vu. I'd had a melt down before, but it had been Daniels arms around me. This felt all wrong.

Dolly stepped back, holding me at arms length.

“Are you sure?” I nodded. “Tell me all, and leave nothing out.”

He led me to the kitchen and pulled out a chair, onto which he pushed me firmly. When the kettle had been set to boil on the stove, Dolly tore off a piece of kitchen paper and handed it to me. The rest of the roll he placed on the table-top. Reversing his own chair, Dolly sat down and leaned his chin on crossed arms over the back of it. He looked intently at me and prepared to listen.

“Now, tell me exactly what happened.” he paused as the kettle began to whistle, and rose to busy himself with the age-old task of tea-making. “I thought you two were doing fine. As did Daniel, it would seem. What went wrong?”

So I told him 'all' as requested, between sobs, leaving nothing out. Dolly returned to the table with two mugs of steaming tea, and the biscuit tin. He sat back down and listened patiently, as always and his demeanour remained calm. He didn't even twitch a smile when it came to the kissing bit.

“Daniel just turned away from me. He shut himself up in his study. He wouldn't talk to me Dolly!” I tried to blow my nose but found I had shredded my hankie. Dolly tore off a fresh one. “What if I've lost him, Dolly? What if he never wants to talk to me, or even see me again?” I was beginning to panic anew.

“He seems like a decent bloke” my best buddy assured me. “|He'll understand. Just give him a few days; he'll get over it.”

I placed a hand on his arm and asked “you do like him Dolly, don't you?” Suddenly his approval was really important to me.

Dolly reached over and squeezed my shoulder.

“Of course I do, Bella. I like him a lot.” He paused a moment or two. “But I don't like-like him, in case you're wondering.”

“But what if he doesn't forgive me?” I asked again, a new wave of despair bubbling to the surface.

“You didn't refuse, Emily” Dolly pointed out, matter of factly. “You just postponed the idea. He never actually proposed, did he? If Daniel truly loves you, and I'm sure he does, if he really wants to spend the rest of his life with you, he'll wait till the time is right.”

Dolly was right, as usual, Daniel had only suggested that we get married, and I had not exactly said 'no' 'Hold on to that thought' was what I meant, but it didn't come out right.

“Did he go down on one knee and say 'will you do me the honour?'” Dolly continued his train of thought. “No. Did he offer up a fancy bit of bling? No. There was no wine, no dinner by candlelight with a string quartet on the side. That's how they do it in the movies”

I managed a weak smile at the picture he conjured. It had definitely not been like that.

“Very slapdash, if you ask me. So Mr Darcy. “ I shot him a quizzical look not quite comprehending. “You remember. That favourite passage of Jen's in Pride and Predudice? When Mr Darcy first proposes to Elizabeth Bennett? He says ' you must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you'. Jen was listening to the audio when I was round there yesterday.”

I remembered it well. Elizabeth turns Darcy down at first, but gets a second chance later on in the story. Maybe I would too.

“You know, sometimes I feel like I'm on a roller-coaster, Dolly” I told him. “Everything that's happening in my life; Aunt Jen being ill, and meeting Daniel. I'm so mixed up and twisted around. One minute I'm soaring, then around the next corner I plummet downwards. I feel so out of control.” There was a note of panic in my voice again. I realized this was the first time I had allowed myself to admit how I was feeling. Dolly reached out a comforting hand to grasp mine where it lay on the table. “The only thing keeping me from going off the rails is you Dolly. You're my anchor.”

“I've always got your back, Emily. And so has Daniel.” I looked up at him, a muted question on my lips. “One night, when we were in training for the run, Daniel and I got talking. You had gone to bed. I told him how much both you and Jen mean to me, how much I'm dreading what lies ahead, for all of us. Daniel said he was in it for the long run, no pun intended. He told me he'd be there for you , me and Jen too, no matter what. In it for the long haul, were his actual words, I think.” Dolly squeezed my hand reassuringly. “So don't worry, Em. This'll turn out right, you'll see. And anyway, you'll always have me” he added.

Turned out Dolly was right. Later that night, as I was getting ready for bed I got a text from Daniel. I almost didn't read it, but steeling myself I opened the message. It read 'I understand. Busy with Taylor B-H next week. Call you soon. Love you, D'.

I wanted to ring him, but it was late, and I didn't know what to say. ' Thank you' seemed so lame when I read my reply. I thought of all the things I could tell him. But there was really only one message that would say it all; a simple one, just three little words. 'I Love You'.