Let's Just Leave That Thought for Dead

The typical teenage female mind at it's finest...

 

You’ve found your way into my dreams again

Transcending another layer of consciousness

I wanted this

I think…

But at 5:30 in the morning one can never be too sure

Unless…

One has been sleeping next to the one that’s been creeping inside one’s head

But let’s just leave that thought for dead

We know how these things turn out for me

Let’s agree to keep things simple

The ripple in my defense created by you’re gentle touch was just a lie

And I refuse to hear another word about it

But I doubt it’ll go away so easy

The breeze is makin’ me queasy and I think I must lie down

Just…not with you

The pain remains in my ears from my last gunshot wound to the heart so let’s not start firing to soon

The Moon in high to enchant the eye of a romantic sap who just can’t find a guy who loves her back

And kindergarten never told you that,

When the knight comes to charm you with looks and class, you’d be swept off your feet and unto your a*s

They don’t tell you the stories with no happy endings

Of women who’s hearts have no chance of mending

Because who really wants to read about real life

The need to escape exceeds that to educate

So let’s drink and be merry for soon we shall die

And we’ll laugh and look up to the heavens and cry

“I’ll go back to the Earth from whence I came without money, power, fortune, or fame.”

“And sins, I know I have commit them and know the Lord will not omit ‘em”

“ I feel the fire at my feet. My body weakens from the heat”

“But I’ve loved another with all I had so how could I be all that bad?”

Death will take me swift and sure if I open wide this door

And I will say my peace once more

Destiny doesn’t live here anymore

Reviews

[Cynthia Barrick (CHING..]

fANTASTIC Enjoyed it WOW

[Belle Morte]

This is a very emotional peice and a great peice of writing. I would say that it has a nice flow, but there are some places where the flow is interupted but, that doesn't matter. It was still an excellent peice. Very good work.

[Dawn Jones]

When the knight comes to charm you with looks and class, you'd be swept off your feet and unto your a*s~ I love that line. It is too true. You capture perfectly those of us who are caught up in the indignity of loving those who will never feel the same. The puppy-dog feeling that comes along with that one person's face, smell, touch. This is a great write. Full of passion and fury and remorse. YOu meld your emotions well.

[SweetPeachesAlways]

Okay, I had to add this to my Favorites before I could even comment! Dynamite piece of writing! Reads so smooth and fluid-like, really nice rhythm, like a rap song almost! Powerful message, poignantly so! OMG, I love this! Terrific job of writing...I want to quote my favorite line but, honestly, too many to decide which one would actually be my favorite! LOVE THIS! Great write! Am I gushing? Hose me down, because this was honestly terrific! Great job!

[Kara Emily Krantz]

this is fanastic. nice little pun with your name at the end, as well!

you should go through this and tighten it up. it could be flawless with a little editing. i mean that in the best way possible

"The ripple in my defense created by you're gentle touch was just a lie

And I refuse to hear another word about it"

fantastic. there were so many lines that i love. i'm going to add it to my library, actually. which i dont do too often :)

hugs

[Aries]

I totally agree with Robert...This is an Awesome Writing...Awesome!!

[Robert Luna]

The feeling that this conveys is wonderful. I loved the way you traveled through this piece with taking ownership of your thoughts and emotions and ultimately your deeds as your own and there was no one else to blame and were willing to take full responsiblity for any payment that was due for them. Showed great character really.


Well DOne!!!!!