Over My Head (Prologue)

Turning point in Kat and Max's relationship

The stone steps are cold beneath me, and my fingers trace light patterns. My ipod lays next to me, purple ear buds sprawled around it. I promised myself I wouldn’t turn it on. If I did, that’d mean that it was over. That everything was over. I have to fight to lie to myself, to keep from going to that dark place.

I look up at the grey sky, signaling the closing of day. Goosebumps rise on my arm as a light breeze wafts past. I ignore it.

He’s not coming. I can’t ignore that anymore. I desperately need the music now, or I’ll break down more than I already have. Grabbing the silver ipod, I turn it on and turn it to a fitting song.

I never knew
I never knew
that everything was falling through
That everyone I knew was waiting on a queue
To turn and run
when all I needed was the truth
But that's how it's got to be
It's coming down to nothing more than apathy
I'd rather run the other way than stay and see
The smoke and who's still standing when it clears

I stand up woodenly and begin walking down the empty street. Everyone’s gone home already, eager for families and friends. Or they have nowhere else better to face what life’s given them. Either way, they’re not here. Much like my best friend, Max Evergreen.

No, don’t think of him.

When everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind

Let's rearrange
I wish you were a stranger I could disengage
Just say that we agree and then never change
Soften a bit until we all just get along
But that's disregard
Find another friend and you discard
As you lose the argument in a cable car
Hanging above as the canyon comes between

Despite my wishes, my stupid brain thinks of him. I know its useless so I give in and let down the damn I’ve built to stop the inevitable pain down. The pain though, is not only caused by him. When I go home, pain will find me, and at school it will find me. I can’t hide, believe me, I’ve tried.

I wonder if he’s with Celeste, his girlfriend. That’s usually where he is nowadays. Before they got together, we spent time together. We traded secrets. We traded stories. Max knows everything about me…except the worsen of the depression. I’m too afraid to tell him, too afraid that he’ll realize just how messed up I really am. I remember, I think it was the Saturday before their second date, he looked me in the eye and asked if I was alright. I wonder if he knew then that he would be feeding the fire that would end our friendship as we knew it.

Max was the only person I completely trusted since…forever, I guess. But I can’t ever trust him again, not really. The catch in my throat seems to grow at that thought.

 Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on, oh...

And suddenly I become a part of your past
I'm becoming the part that don't last
I'm losing you and it's effortless
Without a sound we lose sight of the ground
In the throw around
Never thought that you wanted to bring it down
I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves

Tears begin to slip from my eyes, clearing my previously blurred vision. I’m taking all the backstreets I know, staying as close as possible to the churning waves. Our town, Blackwater, is right along the coast, a tourist trap. Or at least, Downtown is.

I’m beginning to stumble over cracks and holes I can’t see. Max is gone, he doesn’t want to see you anymore. He’s realized just how disgusting you really are. Look at you, stumbling around alone in the lightest part of night. The sinister voice in my head won’t shut up and the tears come faster.

I shake my head, trying to clear it. I take a shuddering breath and begin to run. I run past all of the vendors along the boardwalk. I run past the empty expanse of beach. I run away from everything.

And everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind

Everyone knows
She's on your mind
Everyone knows I'm in over my head
I'm in over my head
I'm in over...

Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
She's on your mind

As the song ends, I collapse in the sand, clutching my sides. My sobs are animal-like, and I can’t control them anymore. And that’s when I knew that it was all over for me. That’s when I knew that I really was broken. I’m sitting here crying because my best friend is happy. Granted, he’s happy without me, but that only matters to me.

Clenching my fists, I stood. I vow that I will be happy for Max and respect the decision he, subconscious or no, made.

Katrina Whistdain was going to be the better person, no matter how much it hurt. After all, what was a little more pain?

Author's Note

I know it's kind of a crappy beginning, but it had to be written. If you haven't read In The End, I suggest you do, it will help you understand the story more.
ALSO I changed Cecelia's name to Celeste because it fit better to me
That's all, please review! :)

Reviews

[Jordan's Back]

I read this story backwards and I loved it from finish to start :)

[Steven Cash]

I LOVE THE FRAY!!! OOOOOMMMMMGGGGG

So glad you did this.

And it wasn't a bad job writing either. Just break up the lyrics more and seed it into the storyline more.

Ah, this is great! :)))))))))) I'm amped as you can see. Don't see many Fray fans!

Oh, and I am rating this 100 out of 100, easy.

ok I'm rambling now

[Amanda]

haha thanks i totally miss writing this stuff.maybe the sequel will have more fray

[Amanda]

oops sorry wrong boook i'm probably not going to finish this one

[Steven Cash]

aw... I should write a story about some songs I like... hmm.....

[Rhea752]

ahhhh confusion it's too late to read another book to understand this one i'll do it tomorrow. night

[Craig2591]

I think it's a good beginning, though it's hard to know this early in the story. You piqued my interest, though, and that's what beginnings are all about. I connected with the character and that's important in a story.

[Sophie]

Maybe you should make "in the end" like a prologue to a prologue? or chapter one? idk, but I liked this (though I didn't bother reading the song lyrics, I will if you wrote them lol)