Back Against the Wall (Twenty-One)

The final chapter of this book. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

Now you know
Yeah you got my back against the wall
Oh god
I ain't got no other place to hide
Chained down
Like a sittin' duck just waitin' for the fall
You know
Yeah you got my back against the wall

Deep in the jungle
Camouflaged by all the fallen leaves
A hand holds up the sky
While shamefully I make my plea
The alters callin'
But my legs won't seem to stand
Guess I'm a coward
Scared to face the man I am

I said you got me where you want me again
And I can't turn away
I'm hanging by thread and I'm feelin' like a fool
I'm stuck here in-between
The shadows of my yesterday
I want to get away
I need to get away
-Back Against The Wall, Cage the Elephant

I am clad in jean shorts and the shirt I picked up back at Adam’s. Turns out it was one of his, so I’m not wearing crusty old clothes for once. We had been walking for a few minutes when I realized we didn’t have our weapons.

“Adam!”

“What?” he asks, startled. I must have broke him out of some sort of reverie. Now that I think about it, he hasn’t really said much since my blow up. I feel worry stew at the bottom of my stomach, but push it away.

“We left our weapons in your room! I mean, we dropped them when we…you know.” Saying fucked seems too crude, like it didn’t mean anything to me. But it did, I mean, I’m pretty sure every girl’s first is always remembered. Adam’s cheeks turn the cutest shade of pink, but then a frown slides onto his face, marring his beautiful features.

“Look, Emma…we need to talk.” My heart begins to pound against my chest, thumping so wildly I’m sure he can hear it. The worry I so carelessly pushed away slams into me, making my fingers curl. The things this boy could do to me.

“What about?” I asked, trying to still my wobbling lower lip.

“What we…er, did…” I think my heart thumped loudly one time, suspending there for a second, and then slowly began stuttering again. I can’t look at him and see whatever rejection that awaits coming.

“What Uncle Kiegan said…he was right…” Adam said, scratching the back of his neck.

I stopped, completely surprised and hurt beyond belief. I always knew that I wasn’t good enough for Adam. I never knew that I would have sex with him and then be dumped. Never had I fathomed Adam being that kind of guy.

But I’d been wrong about a lot of things, hadn’t I? I’d thought my mom was dead, Adam would turn, and this would blow over. They always seem to think that, whoever experiences an apocalypse I mean. The only person I’ve ever played who’s actually been right is John Marston; he cured the zombie pandemic in his DLC. God, I love that game.

I walk faster so Adam doesn’t see me break, and I hear Adam follow, confused. When a strangled squeak escapes me he hurries forward, sliding his arm around me. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

I push away from him through my tears. “Don’t!” I shout, not caring if any zombies are near. “How can you say that? How can you stand there and call me baby when you…when you…” I falter, not able to talk through the tears.

“What?” He cried, still confused. “What did I do?”

“Kiegan was right…” I sobbed into my hands. Dear God, I was hormonal, wasn’t I? My mood just went from zero to sixty in like three seconds. Watch out Vin Diesel, Emma’s got road rage.

“…what?” Then he realized just what he’d said an what it meant. He grabbed my shoulders, being careful of my tender arm. “No, no, no. I was talking about the pregnancy part. I love you, Emma.”

I honestly didn’t know what to think. My mind was blank, until I realized just how close we were to a large group of the undead. They hadn’t been able to pinpoint us yet, so I grabbed Adam’s hand. We found a string of cover that skirted around them; wall to crashed cars, to a hedge. Once past the hedge, we would be able to move more efficiently.

A man dressed in a tuxedo and missing an arm turned towards me after I stepped on a branch, but I was able to make it to safety. The two of us tried to avoid any noise and breathing heavily. While we’d been gone, things seemed to have gotten worse. I hoped everyone was safe back at the Hall.

When we reached Town Hall, the two of us had almost been caught thrice already. I wasn’t sure if we could handle anymore close calls. It turned out that we were ten minutes late and the second group was getting ready to go out. Adam explained that his slightly above-averagely furnished house was already occupied.

“I think it’s getting worse out there, or at least, they’re sticking into thicker groups,” I added, glancing at Bella. Marco said she’d been good, but I knew how she got sometimes. Hal came to stand next to me, touching my elbow slightly. I looked at him, confused and he nodded towards the hallway.

“I need to talk to you,” he mouthed, glancing at the hallway again. I mouthed later and tried to catch up in the conversation. Austin was unsure of why we should go to Adam’s place and the more he talked, the more I agreed. What we had here wasn’t the best, but it was ours and I feel it’s better than there.

I don’t want Bella around my mom. For one thing, she’ll probably tell everyone that Bella isn’t my daughter, which is true but I think it would be safer to keep that a secret. What if we run into anybody that only accepts families?

“I just think we’d be safer somewhere else. This place is really old and there aren’t many locks. What choice do we have?” Adam said, gesturing to all the open doors around us. I knew he was right, but…I felt like if we went back there, I’d end up dead in my sleep.

“How about we just sleep here tonight and then if everyone still feels the same as we do now, we’ll figure it out tomorrow, okay? Either way we’re not going to be any good if we don’t get some sleep,” Carlee offered, nibbling on a little Dove chocolate she’d found in my mom’s drawer. Everyone agreed and we all started to disperse when Hal grabbed my elbow again.

He steered us toward the treasurer’s office this time and shut the door behind him. I raised my eyebrow, confused. He exhaled loudly, holding his forearm. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” I shrugged, still confused.

“Do you honestly think this is ever going to end?” Hal asked, his brows furrowed. I think, in another time- where zombies weren’t walking and I was still obsessing over my best friend, I would have tried to be with him. I think there’s more to Hal than meets the eye.

“I think this is the end.” I said softly, looking up at him. “People aren’t ever going to be the same. We don’t know anything about the zombies, except that they’re wiping us out.”

~~~

“We just need to show him that Humans have realized what’s important. That they’re willing to make sacrifices for each other,” Disaster frowned, scratching his chin. Death looked up at him from where she was sitting.

“How can we do that?” She asked, her brow furrowed. “We don’t even know that they have changed.”

Disaster offered her a mischievous grin, “They don’t have to have really changed. We just need Nature to think they have.”

“I still don’t see how that makes this any easier,” she said, throwing her hands up in the air. They’d been here for awhile, waiting for the perfect solution to come to them. Nature was due any time, and they had to have their act together.

“Well…people make choices in life or death situations, right? In the midst of disaster!” He was smirking now, stepping closer to her. “We just have to-”

“-do what we do best,” Death grinned, her black eyes seeming to sparkle.

~~

We are surrounded. They’re everywhere, or at least that’s how it seems. The eight of us were trekking through town towards Adam very large house. We’d come to the decision that if people didn’t like holding up there, they could move on if they wanted to.

Everyone seemed to come to the conclusion that we would all eventually be separated from one another. I don’t want to be, I know that. Especially not from my boyfriend, sister, or the rest of my family (which includes Carlee, because she’s like a sister to me now).

As I was saying, we are trapped. They seem to be never ending, and we’re all trying to fend them off. The more we try, the tighter our circle gets. Devon turns around and looks over the red fence that will eventually mean our death. “Hey!” he shouts, “These planks are loose! We can get through!”

The hungry hands of the undead tell me that we will most likely not have enough time. I stab at a man whose red mouth is dripping. His eye makes a sick squishing noise that I care not to remember any time soon. I glance over into the distance beyond us, and see a message someone had painted across a garage door. How had I not noticed it before?

Live for me, Sophia - Daryl

That's when the answer hit me. At least one of us wasn’t going to make it. It was obvious now, the solution. But what I knew was more of a treatment than a cure, it wouldn’t guarantee anybody’s life safety. It could save at least a few, I hoped.

I handed Devon the crowbar I’d been using and crouched down to face Bella. Hal stepped in beside me to fill in the gap. “I love you, Babygirl. Never forget that, okay? Emma loves you, Daddy loves you, Mummy loves you too. We all love you, never forget us, alright?”

She nodded fearfully and I kiss her forehead. I stand up slowly, a new wind blowing my hair around my face. Adam glances at me and I see that he has not fully comprehended what I am about to do yet. Good.

“It’s open! Go! Go!” Devon shouts, grabbing Bella and pulling her through. I silently say I love him, as everyone begins to escape through the hole. I take a step forward instead of back and Adam turns, his face full of panic and fear. “EMMA!”

“I love you Adam, so much. Please, please live for me.” He tries to grab my arm, but I am further away than he thinks. I start to cry. I take a few more steps forward.

 “I have a theory that selflessness and bravery aren’t all that different” I recall the quote from one of my favorite books.

Selflessness is a whole other kind of bravery that makes you’re heart pound and everything shake. You don’t know what will happen in those few seconds of fear where you have made your choice, and that is what makes it selfless.

I take a deep breath and call out to the zombies, distracting them from my fleeing family. After I am gone, I hope they will always remember me and what I have done for them.

I have to sacrifice myself for the people I love to live.

I trace the X on my wrist one last time, knowing this is what I am meant for, what all those years of preparing myself to die have become.

After all, X marks the spot.

Author's Note

Well, folks, it has come to an end. I would like to thank Sophie for sticking by me during the duration of this book. I'd also like to thank my dad, though I doubt he will ever read this, for letting me watch scary movies with him when I was just a baby. I don't know what else to say really. Thank you to everyone who has read and enjoyed this. It means a lot to me, and I hope to one day be published.
Oh, did anyone enjoy the Walking Dead reference with Sophia and Daryl? In one of the behind the scenes videos, she called him her boyfriend and it's been a joke ever since. Love you Norman Reedus, sexy beast! <3
Hugs and Kisses,

-Amanda

Reviews

[Dark and Mysterious]

I'm crying. That was so sweet and sad...

[Sophie]

AHHHHHHHH! I'm so sad, yet that was the perfect ending!

[Amanda]

Thank you

[♪The Girl Next Do..]

Excellent chapter! An amazing conclusion to a fantastic book! Well done, Amanda!

[Amanda]

Thanks! I never thought I would make it this far! :)

[&#9834;The Girl Next Door&#9834;]

Well ya did! And you did it well :D