Moors in our Hearts

Attic. Far from the madding crowd. 

Silence sedates sundries and all.

A disgraced honeybee hovers over

the window box while the hummingbirds 

dance out of proportion, their shadows 

mocking them well on the walls inside.

-music stirs from sleep-

A mademoiselle, in bathrobe,

is playing 'thy warm embrace' 

in D minor on her piano, drowned 

and drowsed, her face mascaraed, 

scatters of letters rest upon the wooden floor, 

her romantic blouse sprawling 

on her bed, eating its heart out for her.

She just played on and on, 

vacantly gazing at the glazed frost

veiling the window pane.

In the attic across, akin to hers,

A silhouette was playing Mozart's requiem.

Reviews

[.]

This reminded me of the mist filled images of the works of the Bronte sisters and their settings on the bleak, rain swept moors....

It reads like part poem, part screenplay and creates a gentle sense of romanticism in its use of language and imagery. Two lovers, separated by the mist of the moors, each tinkling those keys in melancholic misery, either for love lost or love torn apart.

A very imaginative and gently stirring piece, Suhd. Very much enjoyed.

[Suhd]

Thanks a lot Doodley. You're too kind.

[Isabella Ivy]

As reader, I'm honored to visit the scene, one snapshot of emotion wrought by past occurrences and leaving the question of what effect it will have on the remainder of a life. A novel can be built on such details. Thank you. I.I.

[Suhd]

The honor is mine, you're too kind. Thanks a lot for this beautiful review :)

[AliceBarnes]

At the sight of "Far from the madding crowd." I fangirled. Really liked this and the imagery that you used in this. I also really liked the twist at the end, I wasn't expecting it and then it suddenly popped up and suddenly it just made the whole thing come together. Sorry that this has taken so long to respond to by the way, I have a lot of read requests at the minute so I am just slowly working through them. I really loved this poem and I look forward to reading more of your works. I particularly loved the line "the hummingbirds
dance out of proportion, their shadows
mocking them well on the walls inside." the imagery in that was beautiful and really fitted with the theme and mood of the poem.

[Suhd]

Thank you so much Alice for taking out time reading it and posting such a great review.

[S.zaynab.kamoonpury]

Wow this is intense and sensational. Your wording is very poetic and impressive. Great freeverse description. Kudos.

I'm a newbie here, pls pleez do review, comment my first poem here, wud luv to know your thoughts, I'm navigating the site looking for poetic interaction,

[Ted Kniffen]

I quite like this, Suhd. I get the impression of two lost souls forever trapped in their respective attics playing classical music and pining for lost love.
There are a couple of words to consider revising...

her romantic blouse kept sprawling 
on her bed, eating its heart out for her.

I would drop the word 'kept' as unnecessary, but that's just my thinking.

This is good as it is.

[Suhd]

Thanks a lot Ted for your constructive criticism and insight :) It means a lot to me.

[Zoya]

Spooky. Lovely descriptions. Gave me chills. Didn't quite understand the title though. Well done nonetheless.

[Suhd]

Thanks a lot Zoe! It's Gothic romance.

[Zoya]

Oh. Most welcome.

[Najam Us Saher]

Two people of same taste in different places with same passion. Beautifully narrated a scene through a poem.

[Suhd]

Thanks a lot Najam us saher !

[Najam Us Saher]

You're most welcome.