Cancer, or the cure?

A random piece of writing, just something that i wrote a while ago and though i'd add

How do you escape your percieved ultimate misdeed? Would you ignore it, try to repress it, only to have it bubble to the surface stronger and more insipid that ever before? Would you try to explain it to a friend, one whom you've always trusted with your life, only to question their advice and answer, with reasoning that they have their own set of warped and perceptibly "good-intentions" for your life that quite obviously do not co-incide with that which you now feel is right. Would you try to distract yourself, be it through drink or drugs or games or sports, discovering that none can sway your mind from its hellishly determined path, each glass or toke or game or quarter yet another footstep down it rather than a leap away. Would you attempt to embrace it, so that in knowing its full poisonuos self you can better combat it and keep yourself from ever embarking upon that last damning journey? Perhaps you'd have attempted to lance the feeling, remove as much of it as you can like a cancer, hoping that you can destroy it all at once, only to find out later that you missed that smallest, miniscule part, either subconciously or truly accidentally, and you slip into a relapse, all the hard work, pain and suffering but for naught.

But then, what if you have it all wrong? What if this is not the destructive action that you fear it may be, but the cure? What if it truly is all that you have been hoping for yet fighting against? In the end it is simply a matter of faith, the willingness to forsake everything else for the chance again to be happy, and the hope that this time around it will last. Simply a matter of faith.