A cantankerous writer

Sometimes you are not a writer but just trying to be one

Writing a book is not that simple, it takes courage to write a book. Writing a book means you yourself become void and hollow. You put every thought, emotion, feeling, instinct, experience on  a few lines of paper. To me it is an act of suffering. Sometimes your pen follows you and sometimes it ceases to reveal your undetermined emotions. Writing means becoming a criminal in your mind where your thoughts haunt you, where fear gets you every time, where your imagination falls into an endless limbo without aiming to touch the ground.

  My question which I ask myself many times is why do I write? When writing something haunts me so badly. Why do I feel voidness in my soul? When I can't feed lines with proper words. Why do I cry? When I feel I can't write anything anymore. When they(critics) say writing is an art which only few possess, I ask them how? I want to tell them it is neither an art nor it is some talent, it is just a simple way to express your regret which has haunted you throughout your life. Regret is that compelling instinct which fills soul in the writing. To me writer is one who is unsuccessful in his life. When a writer can't achieve anything in his life he writes inspirational books. When he can't settle his life affairs, he writes fiction so that he can reason himself. When he wishes to master the nature and fails, he writes poetry. Hence writer lives in a universe where everything is followed by failures.

  Despite all this, sometimes when I am alone I think of becoming a great writer who is respected everywhere he goes, and for achieving it I had to be good at failures because failure represent how good I am at writing and how far can I go in this small universe of writers. I want to feel that pain which will help me to stray away from the norms of so called "modern society" so that I an always look at them with hate and hostility. So that I can deliver them the same pain with my feelings such that they will respect me just to keep themselves away from me. Only then I will be able to write what they call

"Writing".

Author's Note

Important note : This story is about a writer who is upset with the world not about me. And just because this writer is upset he sees things with hatred because he thinks these people are responsible for his failures and tries to write against them which make him a great write because now he is not writing he is expressing his feelings which are much more power than mere words.
Please don't forget to write reviews...its important to me

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

I for one am glad you decided to be vulnerable and put your true thoughts on paper. The human condition is messy at times; chaotic, difficult- etc, etc,. I needed the inspiration that I am not the only one who ever had doubts about my motivation, goals or dreams. Keep up the good work; your on the right track. I am a very newbie writer with just three poems so you are to me a great success.

[Miles W.]

A very good write. Definitely shows the struggles that writers can go through both when writing and in real life. Well done sir.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Well interesting views, which (well some of it) I shared, and still share. Could be something in the way the thoughts flow. But then again, he's a writer. Words can be used for the good of each other, then again, words used in the wrong way can be more destructive than nuclear weapons. :) and I'm totally off track with my essay.lol. nice work

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked the Hemingway logic. Travel, test life and be fearless. Jack London traveled and create his tales. Writers need to learn, taste the good and the bad of life. Otherwise get dirty and learn. This is what the writer need to create. A good writer is a good listener also. Dark places have the best storytellers. I liked your thoughts and keep learning and writing. Thank you for sharing your thoughts about my favorite subject.
Coyote

[Usman Muhammad]

Thanks Coyote for reading and reviewing my story. I am glad you liked it.

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure and you are welcome.

[iva]

I like it very much because it shows us how hard is it today for writers.They have to face many people and critits but even with that they still move on.To be a writer tou have to be mentally strong which is not easy in this world of ours

[Usman Muhammad]

Thanks Iva for reading my story. I am glad that this writing won the contest. It is a lot of encouragement for me.
Thanks once again.

[Kuro]

Thank you for clarifying in your note. I thought that was your personal opinion at first. And at the end of the day it is more an opinion piece of writing than anything else. I think you accomplished the objective of showcasing this writers frustration with the world other people and himself.

[Usman Muhammad]

Thanks Kuro for reading and reviewing my story.
Thanks for sparing some time for this read.

[Kuro]

Ah you are from Islamabad. I am from Karachi.

[Usman Muhammad]

I am basically from Lahore.
Now a days i am studying in Islamabad for Civil Engineering.

[.]

An interesting piece, Usman.

Anyone who can pick up a pen and write words, sentences, paragraphs on a page, is a writer. One of the oldest quotes in the profession is: "Write about what you know." We all have our lives, our own experiences, so we all have a fountain of knowledge to draw words and life from to put on the page. We are all writers. Some of us just realise it, others don't.
A nice piece of work.

[AliciaB]

Wow. Intense! I know this isn't your personal opinion on writing, as you stated in your Author's Note, but I do agree with the narrator of this story on some points. For one thing, writing really does take a lot out of you - I think writers are some of the few people who appreciate the tremendous effort that often goes into crafting a single sentence, let alone several hundred thousand of them! :) And pain is indeed often the source of some of our most profound works, the ones that mean the most both to us and to other people. Writing is one of those ways we can connect with each other and help each other through this big, crazy, horrible, and beautiful mess we call life. :) Nicely written story! Keep it up!

[Usman Muhammad]

Thanks AliciaB for reading and reviewing my story. I am glad that you liked it.
Thanks once again for dropping by.

[Fahmida Mehreen]

People say, "My life is an open book. Anyone can read me." But I believe that had it been that simple, there would never be the need to learn languages and understand words, expressions, metaphors, and such like. What is the point of reading staying unlearned? Everything has its own essence and it is not for everyone to feel it the same way. Hence, people "say". Yet, much remains unsaid. And, dies within. Dies with.
A very enthralling piece. Good read.

[Usman Muhammad]

Thanks Fahmida for such encouraging words. I am glad you liked it.

[hcarson]

I dont tent to look or pick at punctuation etc unlessxspecifically asked for so wont go there, so lets just look at the concept of the writing. I like the idea...some writers are loners, qngry at the world etc so i see where you were going with that. Sometimes i just feel like a doing a good rant piece to get things off my chest like this writer in this story..regardless what some thing it wluld make you feel better for awhile lol. I liked the concept and think it could have gone further..more indepth of the charecter and where all the hatred stemmed from etc, over all good job :)

[V]

I personally disagree with your opinion about writers trying to compensate their failures and non-achievements.
It's just not my way of thinking. Moreover there are (still, other users have told you before) mistakes in it like there's an article missing somewhere before writer and others.