Being Civilized

I am sick

Of being blamed

For the fact that my daughter

Doesn't have a father

 

I figure if he can't step up on his own

Why Bother?

It's not my job to keep him in her life

While he goes around spreading lies

As to why

He's not included

He's the one that secluded himself

 

The times my daughter was in bad health

He wasn't there

The times she said she wanted him

He didn't care

The times he said he would be there to get her

He never showed

So many events that have occured in her life

That he'll, never, know

 

So I'm the one that has to look in them big brown eyes

Trying to supply

All the answers as to why daddy isn't around

I can't make it right

But I can continue to fight

To stabilize her as she ages

 

I'm blessed to witness all the stages

From walking to talking

Watching the personality unfold

I've never told her anything negative regarding him

She's at an age

Where she can begin to form her own opinion

 

I can't force him to be at her side

Can't force that fatherly pride

I can only reside on her side as a mother

 

I can't make up for what's lost

I definitely regret the fact she has to pay the cost

For what happened between him and myself

 

A life isn't something you can just put on the shelf

Hoping somebody else

Will come along and claim them as their own

 

It will always be known that's not what's real

She will always feel that void of completion

From the thoughts that can't seem to find deletion

 

Yet in the meantime....

 

I have all these fingers pointed at me

Saying "why can't YOU be more civilized for the sake of your child"

Yet when all the facts are compiled

The truth is....

 

I'm not the one that chose to walk

Here I stand

Stabilized

Willing to talk about the situation

Hoping that one day

Mediation can be met

For far too much time has been spent

Pointing fingers to blame

When a child that shares the same blood

Still sits longing for her daddy's love

Reviews

[Kimberly Tickle ~~~ Dia..]

Li, girl you did your thang with this one... And i'm glad you put this out there because its alot of father's who aren't in their child's life not knowing that in some way that may effect the child, but yet again you put this you here and you tell these women who think they need to run up behind these men so that their child can have someone to call daddy, you tell them that women can do it on their own, and that their are plenty of women who are strong and independent and can take care of themseleves and their child...Great Write Li Li..You kicked but on this one girl....


~~~~Kimberly Tickle~~~Diamonds Of Life

[A.J. Smith]

This is a powerful poem...I love the fact you write about real, hard life, capturing and conveying your pain, and that of your daughter so well. Thank you for sharing this, Li Li.

[A.r. Bazian]

a great piece!
you lil girl should know how much you love her!
i have tons of respect for you!
and i seriously do not know what to say!

i'm sure she knows, and i'm sure she'll grow great... just like her mother!

be well
wish you all the best!

[Renee Porter]

this is a great poem, i pray to god my baby father will be in its life and grow up an be a real man.

[Akaila]

wow! i really liked listening to this one! it was beautiful! it almost made me cry a lil!
~akaila~
good job!

[Juanita]

Damn, I can really relate to this one.

"As a child that shares the same blood
Still sits longing for her daddy�s love"

That really hits home. If you read my poem, "Where's my Daddy" you'll see what I mean. Anyway, Great job. I really enjoyed listening to & reading this poem.

[Angelheaded Hipster]

So I�m the one who has to look in those big brown eyes
Trying to supply all the answers as of why daddy isn�t around
I can�t make it right, but I can continue the fight
To stabilize her as see ages

My mother was a single mother with me, for the longest time I would pester her about my father. But as time wore on, and he never showed, it just made me gain more respect and love for my mother. It takes strength and courage to go on in life, with your own child begging to know. And to be honest with her is amazing.
This should go into a parenting mag, for real.

[Tawny O'hara]

This is a beautiful piece. Well said and shared by many Mother's who must raise the children alone. I garantee the day will come when he will decide to share in her life and she will not want him there.

You state the facts very well and the criticism that people give to a Mother alone. But they are not always right.

[Crystal]

I can�t make it right, but I can continue the fight
To stabilize her as she ages
I�m blessed to witness all the stages
From walking to talking
Watching the personality unfold

These lines bring tears to my eyes. It is my favorite part of being Mom. Watching who they are becoming and you think, "How could he not want in on this?" because you're so proud you could bust... it is a crushingly satisfying love.

I have missed your work... you still amaze me!

[H. A. M.]

I have met a few women that have these same thoughts and don't know how to put them out there without tearing up things around them. They become hateful or spiteful and everybody pays for it. I like this because it doesn't come off as a 'oh poor me' type of deal. The focus is on your daughter and the man not there. Not so much your personal pain. See? Now I know you are not a selfish person. One typo, "as see ages". I know you meant 'she'. I wouldn't burn the house down over it so it's fine. Good one.