Words Spoken (Now with Evoca)

When my words are spoken

I am going to try to repair

Any pieces that are broken

Provide a light

That gives a brighter view

I always have tried to pursue happiness

Through other's achievements

Overlooking aggrievement by

Holding my head up high

I feel if you look up to the sky

You will begin to see

Nothing can possibly be too hard to overcome

Some would say

I have enough strength

To hold back tidal waves

I always appear brave

No worries

It's hard

To discard

All the stress

To confess

The things I chose so long

To repress

See

My words are always uplifting

drifting thriftily

While being put to rhythm

I'm unsure if it's obvious

How much soul is devoted

To each word that I've noted

Because

I don't write about cheap thrills

Trying to instill some spill

On how sorry I feel for myself

Yeah I cut

And I have my scars

There was and still are

Times of depression

I've been to the intersection

Where life meets death

Had one too many last breaths

It's true my heart has been broken

I've shed my well spent tears

Faced the fears of abuse

Bruised and misused

Because of "I love you"'s

Yet

Not once did I complain

Instead I decided to remain

Dignified

Even if I tried and failed

I prevailed

I passed the test to move on

At the time I did wrong

Knowing now I did right

By withholding the fight

Not once giving up

You can't make-up for lost time

I rhyme to deliver a message

To those that follow the path

I now lead

Be sure to read

The "Proceed with Caution" sign

About 10 miles in

It's a long walk

The soles of your shoes will grow thin

Set foot in your own soil

Avoid the turmoil

Learn along your way

Make tomorrow a better day

Listen to the words that are spoken

Reviews

[Sinceer]

Correction...'Spoken Word' with cadence

I feel like flying a kite after reading this...not to sound corny, but your positive words always seem to touch and reach the sky, which is a message that can never be overplayed

I like how you lead by example and become empathetic to anyone who has been in your shoes...which we all know hard times go hand in hand with breathing...

"dignified"

that word speaks volumes

keep them comin

Sincerely
sinceer

[V]

Nice one,
I read this as an explanation to your work. Very well put.
Thanks
V.

[Monique Jackson]

I LOVE YOUR FLOW!!!! Your style is amazing....you are very talented to say the least!

You can�t make-up for lost time
I rhyme to deliver a message
To those that follow the path
I now lead
Be sure to read
The �Proceed with Caution� sign

This is my favorite part in this piece!!!

[Erotic Goddess]

I�m unsure if it�s obvious
How much soul is devoted
To each word that I�ve noted

OH!! Li Li, this was incredible. Wait, no, really, incredible. I read it twice I was so enthralled with it. Your words have such a rhythm to them. I love it. I am glad that I read this piece. It says so much. And the ending was perfect.

[Gaining Grounds]

�How much soul is devoted
To each word that I�ve noted�

MY soul seems blank and words unheard after reading such a tremendous piece.

Message heard.

[Marie Starr]

oh, this is fabulous ... especially the ending:

I rhyme to deliver a message

Be sure to read
The �Proceed with Caution� sign
About 10 miles in
It�s a long walk
The soles of your shoes will grow thin
Set foot in your own soil
Avoid the turmoil

Listen to the words that are spoken

i wish i could hear it ... couldn't get the evoca thing to work ... but this last line just rings ... fabulous!

[Paul Grimsley]

i really like this piece -- it has a clear and simple style that follows a train of thought directly though from the start of the poem to the end. as mona says you possess a dignity that shines in your work and a strength that is born from having been to hard places and having come back from them. this is a really strong write and i really enjoyed reading it.

early on there were a few minor rhythmic problems which i thought might be possibly solved by these solutions:

second line -- i am to i'm?
i wondered if you might drop 'that are' from the 3rd sentence?
drop 'have' from the 6th line?

[Terrell A. Pullen]

You are talented, Very Very talented.

See/My words are always uplifting/drifting thriftily/While being put to rhythm

I can feel that line cause I most of the time choose to write the same way, with an uplifting spirit. We never know who is reading our works, Why depress them while they read? LoL

I wish I had the time you said so much in this one that I can relate too. It was hot though and now I really cant wait to read more

[Matthew Marquis]

Wow. You're quite the optimist in the face of such tumultuous hell. I envy that. This was a pleasure to read.

[Dominick]

I sure did listen to the words that were so beautify spoken. I�m not sure I can say anything helpful that hasn't already been said by past reviewers but I can defiantly relate. I too wonder
"How much soul is devoted To each word that I�ve noted". I really like being able to listen to it while I read along. I�m able to hear exactly how it was meant to be emphasized.

[Gandré]

Wow Li Li! This is unbelievable powerful, of course I 've read it listening to your wonderuful recitation. The flow is incredible, you are able to rhyme with ease! Often one reads poems and can feel how strenuous they try to rhyme (me, too sometimes). But not in your poem! I also liked the structure, you started and ended so tricky, that one can make a sentence of those 2 lines...I liked it!

Times of depression
I�ve been to the intersection
Where life meets death
Had one too many last breaths
It�s true my heart has been broken =>>>>>those are my favorite lines!

Great job, my dear! thank you for posting it for us.