A play on words please and thank you

take my words as for what they are and not what they mean my words are nothing but the words unseen

A hot day at a ranch with two men pulling hay.

Chuck a fat man with a good head on his shoulders, always wearing his lucky hat. 

Brant a muscled man well fit because he works out, a real dick though.

 

CHUCK (Laughing.)

She really told you that s**t?  I can't believe it bro.  She is seriously crazy.

BRANT (Chuckles.)

And, wouldn't you know it... but she wanted to pay me to kick your a*s bro.

CHUCK

Oh really?  Jesus, I know I am fat and all that... but why she gotta think Ive gone psyco?  She aint all that either.  Don't get me wrong, she's got her goods and her bads... she just needs to let go.

BRANT

I know what you mean bro, that's why I told her I can't do it.  I know your not a psyco.  Everyone knows your not a psyco.  We read your stuff everyday.  Nothing wrong with a hard working man to express himself.  I mean, if it weren't for you bro I wouldn't have done it.

CHUCK

Believe me, you are a much better writer than me.  Its your work that gives me hope bro.  Though I only wish I could agree with the Ho thing.  Why do some girls wanna be hoes?

BRANT

It's in their nature bro.  Just like us.  I mean, in all reality Men and Women are one and the same.  Just with entirely different thought patterns.  They try to use psycology on us... so defend yourself with psycology and they can never know what your thinking.  Then apply your concept of "nofear" and well, you see why one might want to be a hoe.

CHUCK

I need a smoke to digest that deep thought.  (CHUCK sits on a bale of hay and pulls out a newport.  He finds his lighter tucked under his hat and takes a long pull to light it.) So, what your saying is.... that women, some of them, are willing to be so easy because they are scared of love?

BRANT

Yep.  Its love that Hoe's are afraid of because sometime in their past,  the were hurt by somebody they loved.

CHUCK

Well, bullshit.  We all have been hurt by love before.  People make mistakes and successes.  Dont cast judgment on someone something the didn't do.  Cause that only hurts and causes no love.  Look, I didn't have all the great childhood... I knew what people did to me was wrong... but, as a kid there was nothing I could do about it.  Then, growing up... sure I showed out.  But I still used it in a positive way.  I was the kid that was the Bully's bully.  If I found out someone was bullied, I helped out... cause I knew that bulling people aint right.  Nothing like a kid who could take a beating from a grown man, could easily whip up on someone their own size.   Then I had to let that s**t go cause I fought a dude in a group home.  Got sent to YDC.  They too thought I was crazy.  Only because they didn't know how to save me.   But, I went to the woods for three weeks in a program that taught me about life.  What life is, was, and is meant to be.  I, in that moment changed, and discovered my love for hay.  Somebody's got to tend the horses.

BRANT

Right.  You worked hard for this farm Chuck.  I'm just glad you could make me apart of the team.

CHUCK

Brant, you have been there for me bro.  Thick and thin.  It's why I always consider you my brother.  Just tell her to leave me alone will ya.  I am not what she thinks and I wish she would just stop this hateful game.

BRANT

You know thats only gonna make her want ya more.

CHUCK

Well, if it does then tell her she needs to tell me.  Gotta be face to face... and she gotta mean it too.  Cause, I know you guys are just f*****g with me and you all wanna kill me.  At least that's my paranoia talking.  That's just s**t to let go of.

 

(SCENE TWO)

Inside the house ranch stands a large wooden table in the kitchen/dining room area.  Eight solid oak wood chair surround the table.  CHUCK, sitting alone in silence, is eating a hearty bowl of cereal.  He pauses for a moment to watch the sun rise from his open kitchen window.  The sunrise has set him in a better mood for the day.  He pours himself another bowl of 'Honey Smacks' just as his cell phone goes off with the tune "Put my numba in ya phone."

CHUCK (Happily Excited.)

Katie! What's up girl, how you doin?  Nice, so you got the green I sent ya?  Good. That makes me proud to hear that.  Well, your welcome Katie.  You have been a good friend to me.  Yeah, wake and bake. I know what ya mean. (Giggles.) Well, you could come over now if ya want.  It's eight am and I have already finished chores.  Just eating a bowl of Honey Smacks.  Mmm, they so good.  Yeah, I am stacked with boxes and I got plenty of bowls.  Four hours, huh?  Well, I will be waiting.  Get here quick!

 

(The doorbell rings the tune of "Freebird" in melodic bell tones.)

(CHUCK opens the door as KATIE enters with an arm load of booze.  KATIE, a beautiful woman on the inside and out, wears a nicely fit white T with blue jeans that fit her curves perfectly.  She also wears her lucky flip flops.)

CHUCK

Wow, that was super fast!

KATIE

Drove eighty all the way here.  You know, I kinda like this town Chuck.  Not to big and not all the crazy traffic.

CHUCK

Well, this is Southern Farm land for ya.  Nice and cool ouside too... its a good time to go fishing.

KATIE

I haven't gone fishing in years Chuck Buck... that sounds like a great idea, but lets get drunk first.

CHUCK

What did ya bring me?

KATIE

Well, I know that you dont drink much anymore... but, down in Florida I managed to find some Lone Star beer for ya.  It was the last twelve pack they had too.

CHUCK

Oh my God!  I think I am in love! (beat) With the beer... I mean.

KATIE(Laughing.)

I know you love me. Don't be ashamed.

CHUCK(Laughs.)

Okay, you know me well... but, remember.  It's just our little secret.

KATIE(Serious.)

Why do you wanna keep it a secret?  Afraid the psyco woman will find out?

CHUCK

I think she is seriously trying to kill me.  She had some dude step up to me the other day and threaten me.

KATIE

Well, it's her loss.  You should really let me move in with you.  I told you I have no problem giving her a bit of her own medicine.

CHUCK

It's best that I just let this whole thing go, really.  You are here now and I wanna spend some quality time with you. (CHUCK leans over to kiss KATIE softly on the cheek.  She drops the beer on the table and turns to kiss him square on the mouth.  They kiss each other lightly a first, and then passion over takes them.)  

(SCENE)

 

 

Author's Note

There is a small radio playing the local rock station in the back ground.

Reviews

[Lady leah]

not sure abt this one, seams more like a skit then anything else.