�Drinking In The Afternoon�

The blow to your nose from another unexpected late night phone call
You knew by the tone of the ring that it wasn’t going to bring good news with it
So why did you bother to answer it?
Maybe you were aware of how much she needed to hear your choice comforting words soft against her ear
“If you need anything then I am here”
You may already feel drained and unable to fully explain, but your Mother will sleep better tonight thanks to you.

A taxi speeds me through Stevenage to a crematorium buried deep in the heart of the countryside
There seldom seen relations are getting to know each other all over again
People who you used to run the streets with in your youth- now older and more lined versions of themselves stand sad
We walk the grounds with our displays and thank everyone who came
Stare into the air until someone brings you back down to earth
They appear from the back of the car and our hands clasp…
We the immediate family shuffle behind until the pew cue for us to sit or stand
“We are gathered here today to pay our respects to those who knew her”

Laid to rest another loved one’s head
The soft Spring soil will not spoil her hair today
As a silk cushion frames her face perfectly
Say goodbye as we blanket her bed with flowers
Brothers and sisters silently questioning, “Where have we all been?”
Tomorrow they will collect her to take her back home.    

As the curtain close all our eyes follow
We hear the casket lowered
And from now on all of our dreams are troubled
My poor family huddle
My Mother is an emotional crumple
Glad I was there to wrap my arms around her shoulder
Hoping that this will be enough to comfort and console her…

After our farewells a free bar calls my name for a much needed gin to ease down my shoulders
This drink is enough to bring me round to speaking without my voice croaking
Watching everyone else interacting the way that families should do
Without the bad words of the past appearing at these table greetings
“She’d have loved this as she was always so busy and interfering”- they all laugh together
I smile to myself as it’s amazing what awakes and what leaves the room with a little drink in the afternoon.

 

X

Author's Note

For Auntie Margaret.

Reviews

[Deborah Leah Krempa]

Well written. I shall read more of your work. Thank you for sharing. Debileah

[R J Askew]

I was wondering what you have been up to. Now I know. Sorry to hear of this. Having said that, from this outsiders perspective, you have drawn a fine and very moving poem out of it with some great touches in it. I like this detail the best ... 'more lined versions of themselves stand sad'. I also like the title and, in the entirety of the poem, the way you capture our slightly embarassed English way of seeing out relatives off.