Within these walls of freedom I saw an endless prison.

We are all trapped

I am a corpse

My eyes sunken in

The bagginess

Weights like blackened plates.

Children playing with their mates.

 

Under trees lay their piercing laughter

The crack, the pause the play that comes after

Connecting all, if happiness exists.

Persist.

 

The earth is barren

Laden with grief

Sinking underneath the leaves

As I see

Capture in

My soul eradicates

Makes

 

Pictures of a life: long dream rapture.

Buried by the weary leaves

Sewn deep into cravats; mine.

 

Mine: Sign the oath

The oath to freedom

Be free, be. Be.

Until you capture life’s long kingdom

Engulfed in riches, laden in gold

Basking under…

Some moonlight

Ghost ridden

broken

You are in prison.

Author's Note

A part of my attempt to describe the deeper meanings of life. Comments? =)

Reviews

[w2de35657u687y4324rf]

Hmm, the partial rhyme sort of ate at me. I normally don't like rhyming poetry and I especially don't like it when the rhyme fades in and out. However, I too feel that we are trapped. I appreciated the significance of the poem and most of the imagery was well written and wonderful to vision. It was a good poem in all, but it could use a bit of review, I think.

[Hunter C. Brown]

a very fine piece of work, full of emotion and depth. good work!!!

[Daniel88Batson]

The first line sets the whole piece. I almost felt like I was watching the world go by from thsi dead body. Really nice work. =D

[alexis]

very good steph

[rose with love]

well you nailed it with this one. the depth of the words have captured me from the beginning to the end. love the whole poem. great job.
and you couldn't ended more properly than this. the last stanza is really great. strong, it has a true meaning. =)