Champagne in Coffee Cups

 

The church doors slammed open as we strutted out of the church. Wearing a shining, diamond bright white dress, we cascaded down the carpeted steps of the church. The sun was high in the sky and even though it was a cool morning for California, the sun couldn’t have made things any brighter, and therefore, so much warmer. Arm-in-arm, we came down the steps together, smiling and happy, and he spun me around in the air as I laughed with more happiness than I ever knew I had. Happier than I ever knew I could be.

 

“Hey Tricia, are you still re-living that?” Rick asked, waving a hand in my face.

 

“No, no, no, I’m just getting to the good part,” I said, trying to remember where I left off telling the story.

 

Dane ran out of the church, after me, stopping dead in his tracks when he saw me in the air as Rick lifted me up. I looked down into Rick’s sky blue eyes and smiled brightly. I saw Dane out the corner of my eye watching in horror as I pecked Rick on the lips. When Rick put me down, he held me in a tight hug, smiling just as brightly.

 

“She’s doing it again,” Ray said, sitting down next to Rick. “You can tell by that goofy smile on her face.”

 

“No wait, she’s just getting to the good part!” Rick said, mocking me and putting his right hand over his heart for dramatic effect.

 

Leah came out of the church, picking up the front of her skirt and dragging the preacher behind her with her left hand. Once she got behind Dane, she slapped him upside the head and turned to the preacher like it was his cue in a movie.

 

“Well!” Leah screeched at the preacher and then smoothing her beginning to frizz hair out of her eyes. “Ask him!” The preacher stopped admiring the bust of her dress for a second and then looked back down at the Bible to get off—on track.

 

“…for better or for worse, so long as ye both shall live?” the preacher finished. Dane was still staring at us, bug-eyed and gaping.

 

“Mmm, who loves ya baby?” Rick asked me, rubbing his nose against mine. That’s when Kyle came up from behind the preacher and put his hand on Dane’s shoulder. Kyle looked at me and shook Dane’s shoulder to get him to answer.

 

“I do?” Dane blurted out.

 

“I now pronounce you man and wife!” the preacher exclaimed. Dane continued to stare at Rick and me and that’s when—

 

“Ohh, NOW’S the good part,” Rick drooled. I really hate it when he does that. It’s kind of gross, and for a guy who looks like he’s a Greek god himself, that really kills it.

 

“Hey baby!” Ray shouted, running to us. That’s when Ray gently pried Rick’s arms off of me, wrapped himself around Rick and gave him a big, wet kiss on the lips.

 

“Nooooo—!” Dane screamed until Leah smothered him with a kiss. Even Kyle was forcing down a laugh and the preacher was laughing too hard to look up that one passage in Leviticus condemning homosexuality.

 

“That moron didn’t even see it COMING!” I cackled, almost falling out of that wooden chair that hadn’t held anyone’s a*s in twenty-five years. “He’s been begging me for years to come back to him after we divorced, and I tell him that there’s a special someone in my life, he’s like ‘Damn now I HAVE to get married!’ He gets married and that’s when I drop the bomb that my ‘special’ someone is my gay best friend! I TOTALLY pwned his a*s into getting married to a dumb w***e! She doesn’t even know what’s coming! Oh my God, don’t you think that’s funny?”

 

“Today’s special is the meat pie,” the waitress said, taking a step back from me like I had fleas. My eyes shifted back and forth as Ray and Rick laughed at me.

 

“The sick part is,” Ray said, slapping his hands on the table, “she wants to be a stand up comedienne!”

 

“…Shut up,” I grumbled.

 

“I’m sorry for my friend’s stupid story, we went to her a*****e ex-husband’s wedding,” Rick said through his laughter and grabbing his forehead. “Can we just get a round of champagne?”

 

“Special occasion?” she asked, her bored-waitress tone coming back after I scared her apron off of her.

 

“Yes, indeed,” I said beaming. “I’m not the bride!!!” Rick, Ray and I all high-fived each other and I whooped and raised the roof while Ray and Ryan celebrated by making out. Concerned patrons were dropping their forks everywhere, and I think I saw another guy eyeing the tent in Ray’s church pants.

 

“…Congratulations. So that’s champagne for three—”

 

“Four,” Kyle said, pulling up a chair next to me. The first thing I could breathe was his cologne. The waitress looked Kyle up and down, afraid that he was going to possibly add to my story. The waitress walked away, beginning to speed walk before running into the kitchen and knocking over a tray full of food for the party of seventy-seven in the back. Kyle looked so good in that tuxedo like you wouldn’t believe. His blond spiked hair just made me wanna stare into his pearly smile and his crystal blue eyes made my heart flutter.

 

“Don’t you think Dane’ll miss his Best Man?” I asked, leaning back in my chair, hearing it squeak. Kyle smirked and put his left arm on the top of his chair.

 

“I think he’s pissed off that I made him say ‘I do’ more than anything,” Kyle said, his Texan accent really kicking in. I think I was leaning in when I realized he undid his tie.

 

“What else was he there for?” I asked.

 

“To see Kelly in that bridesmaid dress,” Kyle said, shrugging his left shoulder. “He totally hates the design but he let Leah pick it because Kelly’s tits really pop out in it.” As Kyle said the word “tits” the waitress was standing behind him, and her eyes popped open with the cork as he said it. By now I’m pretty sure Rick’s tongue was shoved down Ray’s throat, making up for all the time he was pretending to be my boyfriend and I think I heard the clicking of Rick’s belt buckle as Ray toyed with it.

 

“He did that at our wedding too,” I reminisced, sighing. “I knew he was eyeing Leah. I should have figured. She was the Maid of Honor, she caught the bouquet, it makes sense that she was second in line. I knew I shouldn’t have picked that damn dress. She looked better in that than I did in my wedding dress.”

 

“Nobody looked better than you,” Kyle said firmly.

 

“And Dane’s handsome, but if you don’t mind my saying,” I said a bit absently, “you always looked better in a tuxedo than he did. People were asking you if you were the groom, remember?”

 

“I wasn’t supposed to look better than the groom,” Kyle said smirking. “And everyone on his side should know that Dane and I couldn’t be more different. Brown hair versus blond, ya know? They should be able to tell the difference.”

 

“Oh well, I’m glad to have you here,” I said, as the waitress poured the champagne.

 

“The last thing I wanted was to spend more time at that reception where you know Dane’s gonna be in the bathroom with Kelly you know,” Kyle said, his eyes lowering a little.

 

“The last thing I want to see is his ugly damn face making passes at me,” I said firmly. “I ruined his life like he ruined mine. It’s done. I’m through with him. I’m through with him, I’m through with marriage, I’m through with it all. I’m done.” I sighed. I was through.

 

“After one wedding?” Kyle asked as he pulled his foot back from Ray mistaking Kyle’s foot for Rick’s in a game of footsie. “After one marriage? After one try?”

 

“Marriage is supposed to be a one-shot deal, you get it wrong, get divorced if you want, but you blew it,” I said, shoving Ray’s foot away from mine.

 

“I’ll give you another chance to blow it,” a guy that looked like Billy Bob Thornton said, sitting on my lap and spilling his cheap whiskey on my shoulder and almost getting my dress. I was about to sock him when Kyle threw his chair back and lifted this guy out of my lap with his greasy shirt and the end of his gray beard in Kyle’s fist.

 

“I’ll give you another chance to blow yourself if you get away from her,” Kyle threatened. Everything froze when I saw Kyle do that for me.

 

The guy struggled to get down but Kyle gently put his feet back on the floor before giving him one last threatening look and stumbling off hitting on our waitress instead. I opened my mouth to thank Kyle when the waitress slapped the guy across the face and his glass of whiskey spilled to the unpolished wood floor.

 

“Let’s just have a toast, ok?” Kyle said, putting his hand on my arm to keep me from speaking. “Let’s just have a toast to today. The b*****d’s out of your life now. You don’t have to worry anymore. Let’s just make a toast with our—coffee cups?” Kyle held up his coffee cup filled halfway with champagne.

 

“Miss?” I asked, stopping our waitress.

 

“Yes?” she asked in her bored voice.

 

“Um, what’s up with the coffee cups with our champagne?” I asked. Kyle sniffed it.

 

“Coffee cups with really GOOD champagne,” he said confused.

 

“Lady, look around here,” she said, waving her pale hand around the beat up roadside café. “The biggest party we ever had here was when our a*****e manager got transferred so we could get a new a*****e manager. That’s what’s left of that party. He wanted to dip into that tonight because the district manager’s coming tonight and if he’s gonna cheat on his wife, he wants to do it with some style. I just gave you this champagne so I could tell him that a bunch of freaks drank his champagne and then I can piss him off, get fired and maybe get an unemployment check that pays more than this. Enjoy; I just spit-shined those cups for ya.” Kyle looked at his cup in horror before she walked away, almost hitting the side of his head with her a*s.

 

“Well, the b*****d got what was coming to him,” Rick said, holding up his coffee cup.

 

“I’ll say, and I hope we got the same thing coming to us later,” Ray said, his eyes softening as they stared at Rick. Rick turned and looked at Ray smiling softly at him. I sighed.

 

“I wish I had a chance to have something like they had,” I whispered wistfully. “Something…someone who’s nothing like Dane.”

 

“There are a lot of Dane’s out there,” Kyle said, and I realized his hand was still on my arm. I smiled softly.

 

“There are a lot of Kyle’s out there too,” I said a little too quickly, leaning back more. Kyle blinked and kept smiling knowingly at me.

 

The chair snapped under my weight and I fell flat on my back as the back of the chair did nothing to support me. My coffee cup went flying in the air and the cup hit the guy who hit on me earlier. As my head hit the ground and I blacked out, I saw Kyle kneeling over me, cradling my head in the crook of his arm and sitting me up.

 

                                    *            *            *            *

 

As I came too, I realized I was now lying on a carpet and I was surrounded by leather seats on either side of me. The ceiling was low and had lights lining the edge. I looked to my left and saw a bottle of chilled champagne and two coffee cups from the diner.

 

Kyle held my right hand and waited for me to sit up and look at him. I looked at the end of the limo and in the dim light, I saw what looked like the bouquet Leah carried down the aisle that day. I squinted and then gasped in pain. I didn’t realize how many different muscles in my head contracted whenever I did that until then.

 

“Feeling better?” Kyle asked.

 

“If you mean my head’s pounding and I smell like a floor that got pounded by a thousand truckers’ shoes that haven’t seen water in a million years, sure,” I said, lying back down. “Kyle?”

 

“Yeah?” Kyle asked quietly so he wouldn’t aggravate my concussion.

 

“Why am I in a limo?” I asked. Kyle giggled.

 

“You know how Leah wanted a big wedding?” he asked.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Well, her parents wouldn’t pay for the honeymoon, and face it, Dane works at Mc Donald’s. They’re across the street at that dinky little hotel.”

 

“And I thought Leah was supposed to throw that damn thing away,” I said, gesturing with my foot to the flowers in the back.

 

“Leah started bitching at Dane before she threw it because he had his hand up Kelly’s skirt,” Kyle said, rolling his eyes. “And to make up, he wanted to start the honeymoon early. They got to the motel about the time you fell down.”

 

“So how does that explain this?” I said waving my hand around at the limo.

 

“The limo driver said he was sick of listening to Leah bitching while moaning in bed with Dane,” he said. “He said he couldn’t keep his hard on listening to her if she was bitching.”

 

“Ray and Rick—?”

 

“Are in the room next door,” Kyle said in an annoyed voice.

 

“And it’s what ti—?”

 

“Seven-thirty. You were out for a few hours.”

 

“And we’re—?”

 

“Alone,” Kyle said softly. I lifted an eyebrow before gasping again.

 

“I was going to ask if we were too far from the hospital,” I said. “But…I suppose that’s a good answer.” We looked at each other despite the low light. He was handsome when he was sad too. “Kyle?”

 

“Yeah?” he said quietly.

 

“…How long have you felt like this?” I asked. Kyle widened his eyes like he was about to deny it until I glared at him and made him tell the truth.

 

“A long time Trish,” he said, calling me by my old nickname before I was married. “Long time. Long before you even met Dane.” I sat up and leaned against the seat across the way. I sighed.

 

“So,” I said. “You wasted all of this time.”

 

“I didn’t think it was a waste,” he said.

 

“No? You didn’t think it was a waste watching me marry a complete scumbag?” I demanded.

 

“You didn’t have to marry him,” he shot back.

 

“You didn’t have to be quiet when the preacher said, ‘Speak now or forever hold your peace’ either,” I shot back at him. “You had plenty of time when I was twenty-three to say something. I’m thirty-three, now I have to give that all up especially since I hardly have any time to find someone new while I’m still young!”

 

“Who says it has to be someone new?” Kyle said, getting off the seat and coming closer to me. I inched away, backing into the leather seat.

 

“Kyle, I’m done,” I said, forcing my back into the seat. “I’m done trying to find someone. I’m done trying to do any of that. I told you so.”

 

“You’re done trying to find someone,” he said, his face getting closer to mine. “You are done trying to find someone. But you don’t have to try to find someone anymore.” I closed my mouth because I could hear my breathing getting faster.

 

“I told you I’m through, Ky,” I whispered, remembering his college nickname. “I’m done. It’s over. It’s all over.” I squeezed my eyes shut to keep him from seeing the tears.

 

Pop.

 

Kyle poured the fresh champagne into the cups and gestured for me to scoot to him. I sat on the floor of the limo with him as he poured the drinks. He picked up one cup and handed me one before picking up one for himself.

 

“Let’s have a second try,” he said looking me right in the eyes. He clinked the ceramic cup with mine before taking a sip. He put his cup down and took mine before I could take a sip. I wrapped my arms around him and before I could control myself, my tongue was already passionately wrestling with his. I pulled back and sighed.

 

“Good thing too,” I said. “I could taste the champagne on you. It sucks.” Kyle erupted into laughter. It still sounded like it always did before I met Dane. He wrapped his arms around my waist and leaned me back into the seat behind me. I playfully pecked his lips for a little bit before we began to kiss for a few minutes. The limo jerked forward sharply and the bouquet of flowers landed in my lap.

 

“Hey, what’s going on?” I asked. Kyle knocked on the divider to get the driver’s attention.

 

“Where are we going?” I asked.

 

“Mr. Mitchell said he wouldn’t need my services for a few hours,” the driver said. “Is there anywhere you’d like me to take you two in particular?” Kyle looked at me shrugging. He sat down next to me and pressed his forehead against mine. I closed my eyes. We stayed like that for a few minutes.

 

“I’ll go anywhere,” Kyle said. “I don’t care if it’s nowhere, I just want to be with you.” I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed him. I wanted him. I was really through with it.

 

“I can take you to the lake nearby,” the driver said. “Or the park up the road, the other motel down the way—”

 

"Take us back to the chapel," I said. Kyle's eyes widened, but before he could give me the obligatory objection, I pushed the cup of champagne back into his mouth.

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Frances O'Neill]

The ending was kind of nice, although I thought the story was nonsensical and not that funny! Sorry!

[Slender Smile/Husna Tay..]

Really interesting and sweet....with a happy ending...:)

[Writeress]

Really sweet story. Although there's one point where you call Rick Ryan when he and Ray are starting to make out in the cafe. I enjoyed this.

[perfectlymetiKulous]

This was fantastic. I really enjoyed the narrator and Kyle... Kyle seems like quite the character, and how can he not be, being from Texas and all (smile). This was a sweet story of a great comeuppance - revenge is best served cold - and new love found.
You're really a very gifted writer.

[Taylor H]

this was great

[Drew Wade]

looking back on it, this is one of my favorite stories from you, along with 'from a bad part of town' and the first in the bridesmaid series. I like the madcap mood you've set in it. totally worth reading again.

[Drew Wade]

hmm, this thing had me going the whole time. nice ending. nice wordplay in the dialogue. I like the whole story scheme going on, how she tricked dane.. she's a crafty little devil.

this is also a scary story because it's about weddings and weddings scare me. hahaha.

[Nikki]

woah...i love it!!! it was great!!!

[sutoraika]

whoa. lots of twists. lovable story.

[DarkAngelWriter]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

NO WAY!

AHHH!

I F*****G LOVE IT!