[untitled]

Harsh words. Hate and pain

care for your fellow human

is not a request!

demand respect

give torture

words make all the differnce

time and space make it hard

life is hate and love

forget the past

regret the future

when will it all end,

torture of the mind?

give nicely, receive none

give poorly, the silver platter.

Author's Note

I don't think this makes a poem. It's not very long, but it was written in hate, and therefore may not make any sense

Reviews

[Rambling Prose]

The poignant voice in the write makes perfect sense & can be summed up in these few words:

"when will it all end,

torture of the mind?

give nicely, receive none

give poorly, the silver platter

Life is a paradox in many different aspects & you capture it all in those few words. Unfortunately, without the one we would be void of the other. Hence, the paradox.

Nicely done...

[Rhiannon Dragonraine]

Interesting; it has a beatnik quaility to it, though I agree with you it is not quite the making of a poem yet still an interesting insight into the human experience which in my opinion is after all what writing is all about to shed light on the inner workings of the human emotions and mind, and though this is definitely the words of shadow self it does have it's value in that.

[James Takeo Panton]

Honesty in itself can be poetic, and I am also a great believer of writing something in the moment...without adaptation, or editing....this writing is very truthful and honest in its feeling....good stuff!

[BrightEyes]

I think the premise here revolves around the seeming unfairness of life in general. It does seem that the worst get the best and vice versa. Perhaps though it is simply our idea of what is best that is incorrect - sometimes we don't really know what is best for us. Although of late, I have to agree with the ideas behind this - especially the line: "give nicely, receive none
give poorly, the silver platter."

[Brandon]

I thought you did a nice job on it. Worded very well throughout.