Chapter Seven: My Creator

Sorry for such a long delay! I'd been planning this for a while, but never got around to it. About what matters most to Falian...and, subsequently, now to Elizabeth.

 

I spent several hours alone in my room, lying on my bed, thinking and re-thinking everything about Falian. I went over his history, trying to imagine what it was like for him when I wasn’t there to see it. I went over all my memories of him, from the night we met until this very moment, in which he was likely writing or praying or pondering things in that intriguing way of his. I recalled every tiny detail and habit I had noticed about him…

When the thoughts started to become dangerous again, I took my CD player and headphones and started listening to an old CD of mine to clear my head. I closed my eyes and concentrated on nothing but the music.

I opened my eyes when the CD had finished and nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw Falian standing in the open doorway.

He smirked at my reaction, trying to hold back his laughter. It took him a while before he could attempt to speak. “I’m sorry; I was unsure whether or not you were sleeping. I made dinner.”

Was it already that late? Something else struck me. “You can cook?” I asked.

He grinned. “I understand how to, it’s only experience I lack. I decided on something simple, so I wouldn’t mess it up the first time, anyway.”

I got up off of the bed and walked into the kitchen to see for myself.

He had made a spaghetti dinner, complete with sauce, meatballs, and garlic bread.

“Simple would have been leaving it at spaghetti,” I muttered.

He shrugged. “The spaghetti seemed to have worked, so I moved on to everything else.”

I rolled my eyes at him and sat down. He joined me shortly after.

As was usual, we didn’t speak a single word until the meal was finished. I glanced up at him when it was. “Not bad for a first attempt,” I commented.

He smiled, but he didn’t respond.

The silence dragged on, but not in particularly bad way. I felt comfortable with him there. His presence seemed familiar, probably because it had been there all my life; I just hadn’t noticed before. I suddenly felt the urge to reach out and take his hand. I made a fist in response to the urge, deciding against it. I recalled when he had taken my hand before, very early this morning. How could it have possibly been only that long? It seemed like ages ago. I wondered at the motives behind that action now.

“Elizabeth? Are you alright?” Falian asked, looking concerned.

“Yes, yes, I’m fine,” I replied, snapping out of my reverie. “I was just…thinking.”

“What about?”

Oh, nothing, just obsessing over every little detail I can remember about this morning when you took my hand for goodness’ sake I thought sarcastically, slightly angry at myself. I got up and collected our dishes, facing away from him to put them on the counter so I could lie more efficiently. “Just about how much my life has changed in the past few days.” I sat back down in my chair, looking at him again. His eyes made me forget what I was talking about, where I was, who I was…

Falian returned my staring in a less creepy way than I envisioned myself staring at him.

He must think I’m a freak or something I thought casually, though I was too lost in him to care.

“They say the eyes are the windows to the soul,” Falian spoke softly.

“Your soul is definitely not black,” I blurted before I knew what I was doing. I could feel myself blushing, but I didn’t look away.

Falian smirked. “And I would imagine your soul would not be green, either.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that statement.

Falian laughed as well. “But back to my point, I believe that statement about eyes to be correct. I look into your eyes and I see…you. I see what I’ve always known you to be, what I could always sense before. People take eyes to just be pupils and irises and optic nerves arranged in such a way to enable you to see, but they’re so much more than that. They really can convey your soul.”

I blinked, stunned. “That was rather beautiful.” Of course, it was Falian. He always said amazing things.

There was more silence. I became lost, once again, in his enchanting eyes, his warm smile. I could feel myself losing track of time. I kept wondering what he was thinking, and if he could really see my soul behind my eyes. “What means the most to you?” I thought aloud once again, unable to stop the question from slipping out.

He cocked his head to the side, most likely wondering why I asked that. “God,” he said.

I blushed, feeling like an idiot. Of course that was going to be the answer. He was an angel for goodness’ sake.

“Don’t be ashamed,” he said, reading me.

His remark only made me blush harder.

“May I ask why you wanted to know?” he requested quietly.

“I sort of decided that I wanted to know more about whatever your answer was,” I replied, figuring it would be hard to come up with a decent lie in my current state. My blush deepened even more, if possible, at admitting that. Oh, how obsessed I was with him.

However, Falian didn’t seem to be concerned with my arguably unhealthy infatuation with him.  His eyes immediately brightened up. “I’d love to tell you all about Him,” he practically sang.

I couldn’t help smiling at his amazingly joyous face. “I suppose it would be good for me to get to know my creator, now that I know He’s real and I’ll probably be seeing Him sometime soon.”

His face fell slightly at the mention of my impending death, and I felt sorry for mentioning it. But he perked up soon enough and started talking ecstatically. “God is absolutely amazing. He’s everything. He’s life, He’s light, He’s truth. He has always existed and He always will.”

“That’s something I never quite understood,” I interjected. “How can he not have a beginning?”

Falian didn’t hesitate. “The words beginning and end are both associated with time. Something that exists in time has a beginning and an end. It’s inescapable. But you see, God created time. He doesn’t exist inside it. So He doesn’t have a beginning or an end,” he explained.

I frowned. That sort of made sense. “But where did He come from?” I asked.

Falian grinned. “Don’t you see? He’s the only one who’s ever existed forever. Someone has to have, if you think about it. If you start thinking about someone creating Him, then someone would’ve had to create that one too, and so on. It would be a never-ending chain, and it doesn’t work that way. He’s already at the top of the chain, and I don’t see why people are so intent on thinking that He’s not.”

I nodded. I was starting to get this. “Can you tell me why so many bad things happen in the world, if there’s a God?”

“It rains on the rich and the poor,” Falian said, shrugging.

I stared at him, confused.

He smiled. “Bad things happen. It’s just something that’s unavoidable when it comes to free will. If you can make choices, you can choose to sin. And sin opens the floodgates for evil, and all bad things.”

“Okay, but if free will causes all this mess, why did He give it to us?” I challenged.

“Think about this for a second. If you had the choice between programming a robot to fetch a stick, or telling a dog to fetch a stick, which would make you happier if it obeyed?”

I blinked. “I’m not sure where you’re going with this metaphor.”

“The point is that the dog can choose not to fetch the stick.”

I nodded slowly. “I see. So it makes God happier when we…choose to follow Him…rather than being forced to,” I concluded, putting things together out loud. I thought for a moment. “But what about the people who don’t choose to follow Him?”

Falian’s face fell. “It always makes Him very sad when that happens. But He thinks it’s worth it, for all the ones that do end up following Him.” He started smiling again after that.

I was quiet for a moment. “I really, honestly don’t want to sound so selfish, but…why did bad things happen to me? Did I anger Him in some way?”

“No, not at all,” Falian said, his face suddenly filled with sympathy. “The people…who…hurt you…” He closed his eyes, looking like he was suppressing anger. “It was their choice. Free will.”

“But what about the things that happened as if by fate? The things that weren’t controlled by anyone’s free will,” I urged.

Falian’s eyes reopened. “He only intervenes on certain matters. Stopping every little bad thing from happening is like spoiling a child; the child becomes ignorant and snobbish. If He spoiled the human race, they would dig themselves deeper into pride and greed, and they’d end up damning themselves more. It’s pretty much a lose-lose situation,” Falian explained with a grim expression.

“Why wouldn’t we appreciate the fact that nothing bad happened to us?” I was still not quite happy with what went on in the world, nevermind my personal matters.

“You know that feeling, when you’re in intense pain and suddenly it just stops? Then you feel so relieved. You’re thankful for the absence of pain. Nobody would know that feeling if they didn’t know pain. Feeling perfectly normal would be the worst it ever got. You can’t appreciate the absence of something you’ve never felt. Believe me, the way things are is the best choice out of all of the options. When you humans complain about how awful things are, you really have no idea how much thought He put into creating the Earth.”

“I…I guess I’m sorry on behalf of the human race,” I said.

He smiled. “He really does look out for all of you, you know. Some of you just don’t realize it because you’re so caught up in what you think it should be like.” His eyes softened as he looked at me. “I’ve always appreciated your view. You wondered why the bad things happened, but never for very long. You pushed your worries aside and trudged on, no matter how bad it got. Though you stumbled, you had a somewhat clear idea of what really mattered in life.”

I blushed again. “Tell me more about Him. Anything you can think of,” I asked, partly because I wanted to change the subject, but mostly because he had me so interested in God now. Captivated, even.

Reviews

[Forist.johnston]

It's certainly the most INTERESTING chapter yet. To eight!

[KEi]

Haha! So he finally converted her. I was waiting for that to happen.

She had to have seen it coming, really, I mean, he's an angel, for crying out loud.

I like this chapter.
Like Claudia MelGregory said, spiritual, but not overly so. it's not like you're trying to convert Writers' Cafe or anything, but in a story containing an angel, there has to come a point where the people in contact with that angel ask what Elizabeth did.
it's logic.

I did like it.

[Claudia MelGregory]

Great chapter! It was spiritual without being preachy, exactly like two friends just sitting down and discussing beliefs. I thought it read as insightful and well thought out. Certainly a chapter that would open up doors of discussion. It had depth without being bogged down in message.

The interaction between Falian and Elizabeth is great to follow, and developing relationship wherever it may lead is great to follow.

I apologize for not getting around to reviewing this sooner. Life is what happens when we're making our plans.

Great job on this. Hope you continue.

[Wolfwind Words]

I like it! this chapter was more mental, in that it went into the fallen angel's views on god. But it also opened up a window showing that the girl was having feelings for this near perfect entity.
Great Write!
Can't wait for the next chapter.