5 Again

talking about memories as a child

5 Again

“Hi how are you today?” a kind coworker’s flashes a bright

Smile at me, and I sizzle out a reply, glue spurting out

My cracked lips- I think I am.

Just tell me when I’ll be just MORE than ok? 

Not when I’m 90, and this truck is unloading behind me

Headless chickens with feathers flying everywhere, when

I’m five again, in Mom’s car, driving by, staring

At Nathan Clifford School, so excited to escape

The atombomb’s nothingness.  Little does the girl

Who remembers this moment in yellow sheets and spotlights

On stage know, that I will swing up into the blue

Milky way, too many times, sucked into a vacuum

Cleaner, beyond my classmates reach.

Stumble over too many rocks, read too much

Stephen King.

The headgear stretches my face open into a banana smile, and

In my memory, since the love for me is shining like a halo,

Yellow, just like Mom and Dad’s apartment near Maine Medical,

When I remembered scattered things lying on the floor like corpses.

Corpses of this memory, but monuments growing like a flower

Or a bean stock to the gold foundation of what life could be

 

If the flower, stepped for love and not for other yellow glows.