Dear Chloe

Can't really remember too much about writing this, it was done awhile back. Lovecraftian inspiration.

Dear Chloe,

            It has been eleven days since I last saw you. Much has changed in those very few days. Where once we would laugh and smile; now there is only memory. Such a cruel world we have come to live in, where so much can happen in one instance. Eleven days and my life has truly changed.

            Perhaps changed is not the best word to describe what has transpired, no. Other words sound fitting, that my life has evolved, aspired, morphed, shifted, but none of these words carry a feeling. You cannot look upon the words and begin to understand what has happened, but that it has brought a disturbance into my life….

Eleven days have come and passed, and yet it seems as if a whole lifetime has passed me by. Now I gaze out my window and I can see so much more, I feel the wisdom of an elder yet remain myself. Or is that a lie? Have I changed so much that even I am unable to realize? Where once I saw hills, mounds, trees, all I can see is the struggle of life, of how these little specks in the earth are unable to realize their miniscule role in our life cycles. But this leads to further thought…. Who are these meant for?

I can tell the question resonates within you, as it has with me, but do we know the answer? Or any possible answers?, Whose to say that the animals of our world are not the rulers, and we have rebelled against nature to achieve a false sense of superiority? Are we not all just bones and mirrors of our past selves? Do we not follow in mindless footsteps and hope to achieve a small amount of change??

 

 

Dear Chloe,

            It has now eclipsed 23 days since we last laid eyes upon each other. More and more information develops that I cannot wait to share with you. The change has developed more, in what I believe will eventually result in my demise. I’ve begun to listen to music. I can hear you now, “Begin, how does one begin to listen to music, it’s just natural.”

My dearest Chloe, it is not. To truly listen to music one must immerse themselves in the sounds, they must remove all distractions, and focus solely on the music. From this, it is quite stunning how amazing the world around you shall shift the day one truly listens. It is a long process to truly begin to understand one’s senses, taste, touch, and smell, three easily developed senses, yet there are two constantly underused and frankly ignored…

            For a man can only begin his true life after he has discovered the true way to use his sight, and the true way to hone his hearing. Just with truly listening to the music, understanding every note, every action, to picture in your mind hoe the artists looked as they first discovered the notes to piece together such music, the eyes work similar. One can look at an object, any object, let’s say a wire, and look at it. Really look at it; can you see the threads, all the intertwining little strands that went to make this one piece? Now just by looking at this you should picture all the uses, everything this tiny wire is a part of, everything one would use it for……… This is true sight dear.

 

Dear Chloe,

            I have lost track of how many days it’s been. It feels much longer than it actually has been, and I fear my mental state is faring no better. Questions continue to assert me, and continually I provide the voices no answer, no retort. I fear they will take action against me and my body will no longer be mine.

            It is with this mindset I must write what I can only assume will be my final letter to you... Not by choice madam, but I have no strength to resist the demons I hold….. Did you ever have this problem? Before you were taken from me, I often wondered about the state of your mind… So forgetful, at times practically blind, but now with my mind the same, I understand you.

            It was not you that was blind, no, it was me. You saw the world, truly saw it, and it rendered everything unimportant invisible to you, for it held no such meaning. I wish I could’ve walked side by side with you in those last days seeing as you had, I often wonder what hidden secrets the city holds within. Instead, I shall stay here, secluded on this island, surrounded by water, beautiful yet untamed.

            Is this what life was about? Slowly watching you turn mad as the world became increasingly beautiful? I suppose it’s a cruel trick meant to show us the folly of our ways, so that we may spend our few days remaining accepting and forgiving, so that we may gaze out into the distance and see true beauty in the world. I no longer bathe, I do very little with my time now besides see and ponder, every other task just seems so mundane, and I find it of no benefit to myself to complete such tasks.

            You gazed upon me so often during the last days, now I wonder why I did nothing to help. I know that you tried to tell me, but it must seem like gibberish to everyone that has yet to experience it. My mind, what little is left, reached out to our neighbor, Jackob, but he did nothing but continue on his way. He scoffed at me, Chloe, and now I know I was just the same to you. What a cruel fate to know that you left this world with me, acting so distant, crippling our relationship.

            Knowing what it feels like, I must live with this guilt, sweetened by the fact that my life shall end the same, tired, slow, and alone. So much I would do over, but that’s true for any relationship, but I left you alone, my dear friend, and you withered away. Now it is my turn, and towards the light I shall drift. Will you be there to guide me or spite me???? We shall soon discover...

            Had you been here, with me, you would receive these letters, and I would receive frantic replies, but that is not the twist of fate that befits us… There is no one else of importance in my life to write to, so it befalls upon you, my friend. I truly miss you, but not for long…….