The Night I Wept Under the Saint Andrews Cross of Mercy

I am the after thought of the dust
trampled under the soul of her foot
my spine pulverized by the beauty of her flesh
it's fragments cut deep into my gut
released poisons of my mind
as memories once kept hidden
in the darkness of my heart
emerged brilliantly into her light

"Broken, so broken you are!"
She speaks like black liquorish
appeasing to the ears and bitter to the taste buds

Her words pre-medication
to numb my feelings for her truth
like a surgeon using a dull blade
she begins to dissect my purpose for being
careful not to slice a major artery
I already have internal bleeding
my blood flows like black acid
searing hurt and pain to anything it touches
I am full or regret and I ache
from the weight of her body
as she stands a top my chest
looking for a soulless soul in this cavity
vengeance once gave me life
death is merely a promise of peace for me
my self image I abhor
I refuse to look at it in the mirror
if I did it would only make me cry
humiliation can ease the pain
degradation is the cure
for an emotional masochist
bent on becoming a pain s**t
her whip like love ripples against my skin
tearing it from bone and spirit
I cry on the inside
my fist clinched and I endure it
like Denzel Washington in Glory
except I screamed for mercy
and she didn't show it
until I collapsed from pure exhaustion
in her arms I found kindness
tender was her touch
upon the wounds of my heart
her kisses nourished me back to health
her finger stroked against my face
made me vulnerable to love again
my love for her, not even God can touch

I wept under the Saint Andrews cross
while others looked onward
watched me descend from sub space
people described it as intimate
as she stated strongly

"Broken, so broken you are,
but you're mine!"
 
The beauty of our D/s relationship
is that she accepts the ugliness
I hide within of being who I am
that is what it means
to be loved

I am her treasure
and she is my life
 

Reviews

[Muse]

Your S&M point-of-view makes me blush. ;)
"Broken, so broken you are!"
To break someone down, and nurse them back to health. It makes me think of the Stephen King movie "Misery". Your writing is taboo, but this is why I enjoy reading your work. You're not scared to push the envelope.........make the reader uncomfortable; like nails on the chalk board. Yet you enchant the reader to not turn away, to not cover their ears. They want to see the evil, know it, feel it, and fall in love with it.

[light and ashes]

You take us through a tale of love in the eyes of a submissive companion. You def push the envelop for sure..but it is a good thing. This is very interesting and I love that you gave the reader a take of this from your mind's eye, very nice.

[Larry Dyson]

so many need the punishment or the Correction to feel self worth..If we as dominants can give it ..then we are their deliverers...truth? forgiveness in the form of being broken and reassembled by one who acepts then ...unconditionally.

[Silent Serenity also kn..]

WOW....this piece is so captivating....cruel to the core, yet I couldn't stop reading! I agree a lot on what Muse said!

Why is it the pain that holds us prisoners to another....like a beaten dog...yet that beaten dog will still unconditionally love his abuser! Abuse is what it is yet it is that control that is imprinted in what our self worth is!

I seriously am still in awe....you took me to a place where most still can't comprehend but then to the other readers is so fascinated! This piece was extremely intense....you held me captive till the very last word!

[Nishant Gupta]

nice one read mine too "QUEST OF LIFE"

[johnnyqueer]

This is wonderful! I really enjoyed reading this.

[Dove]

Woah, i love this, its awesome. I would call this poem "raw" just because of the emotion in this piece.

[Ladysue]

wow very intense to say the least. I agree with Muse too...taboo, yet you know how to draw in the reader...

[Phoenix]

I enjoyed this write, seeing a POV that I've never seen before. Unable to look away not because it's a train wreak you can't help staring at, but for respect for the raw soul that is bared here.

[MS. BABy]

WOw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Liza]

intense - liberating - interesting - soothing and disturbing - how can this space keep up - once your pieces have been unleashed do you look for more to feed the brokenness - kind of reminds me of myself when i used to walk into a confessional room and tell the priest lies because i couldn't think of any sins - hey - he needed a job; i was the sinner - he was to cleanse me lol :)