Night Blues

I am wide awake when the world is asleep
The pain, confusion, and sadness arise from the deep
So many puzzles and unanswered questions
Stirring up all types of debilitating emotions

I not just wish but pray and hope for the nightmares to end
So I can be myself and no longer have to pretend
Lord, please give me, them a break
I am getting restless,only so much I can take

I took a chance and opted for better
The effect in my life to date remains bitter
I try to move on and forget
But the results of my actions keep me tied with something to regret

Dashed hopes of higher love, true friends and a purposeful existence
Gradually erasing from me,persistence
The fear that accompanies the thought of my accumulated bills
Daily breaks the heart I am trying to heal

These days I am very silent
With a thousand and one words that torment
I have learnt that there is no safe space to
talk about all my defects
Everyone loves things and those that are perfect

I am grateful for the ability to create a union between a pen and paper
An action that is described as writing
Maybe someone will come across this piece later
And realize they aren't the only ones with things they are battling

I do not claim to have all or any answers
I hope this piece has some effect like chemotherapy on cancer
In reading you will realize that in your struggles you are not alone
Which would be a ray of light for the dark long journey home