I Like What I Hate

I hate
The sight of my blood on cracked mirrors
It fills me up with so much terror
The pain i felt at the sound of closed doors
By those that promised me more
How i cowered before them so they'd stay
While toying with my mind was how they played
How i thought with them i'd find happiness
But they mistook my vulnerability for weakness
How i tried to change who i was for their attention
And kept my true real self in detention
How I longingly waited for mails,texts visitation and calls
For i had given to them my all
How my expectation was met with a deafening silence
I couldn't understand like life in its essence
How deeply i was overwhelmed with the bitterness of sorrow
Feeling afraid ,inadequate for the future to come tomorrow

In a moment of deep reflection to find for my troubled life a solution.

I discovered..I like

The peace that comes with self acceptance in totality
My strength,as well as my frailty
The resolution to take life one day at a time
A vital key to living life in its prime
The futility of expecting from others that which should be given by self
The joy of seeing books on my shelf
The knowledge that once in my life your
time is over
Its not the end,along will come another
The bloodied piece of a broken mirror when cleaned will provide vision
As clear as a picture on the television
I do not have to change my personality to be loved
For in my true self I am worthy and free from reprove!
How i started to write little love notes to me
Expressing all the limitless possibilities that abound in me
Freeing my full self from detention's gate
Declaring boldly that I like what I hate!!!

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[John the Baptist]

In all pain lies the seed of growth.