Twelve Years Down

Take my hand now
Stand closer, stand right there
Tell me, can you even see me
Do you even care
Do you see the pain in my eyes
It's been there every day
Every minute of every hour
Since you went away
You went away
You walked away from me
You left me all alone
Drowning in misery
I don't know what to do
Now that you're gone
I'm trying desperately to find
A reason to go on

Drowning in the tears
That I cry every night
Trembling from the awful fears
That keep me filled with fright
I'm afraid I'll never be
Anything to anyone
Because there's nothing left of me
After the damage that you've done
All that you've done
You ripped my world apart
You crushed my soul
And you shattered my heart
You took an innocent man
And left a broken boy
I was looking for love
But you were looking for a toy

When you took all that I had
And there was nothing left to give
That's when you showed me your true colors
The ones you always hid
You lashed me with a spiteful tongue
Dripping with malice and disdain
Now I'm trying to move on
But there's no end to this pain
This pain won't end
It keeps coming back
It gets stronger each time
With each new attack
How do I escape
How can I move on
When everything I've ever loved
Is gone

You tore down the walls
That I built up inside
You grabbed on tightly to my confidence
And squeezed until it died
Without my strength of self
I was putty in your hands
Another pawn left in your wake
Who could never understand
I don't understand
How you could be so cruel
Why did you mistreat me
You played me for a fool
And still I stayed with you
I did whatever you said
Breathing as if alive
But already dead

Now I'm just a shadow
Of the man I used to me
There's nothing left in this hollow shell
You ripped it all from me
My ego and my id
Are nowhere to be found
Emptiness is all I see

When I look around
Take a look around
Tell me what you see
It's a barren wasteland
That's all that's left of me
How do I get back
To what I used to be
How I find peace
And tranquility

I need to find the way out
I need to find the door
I cannot keep on living like this
I can't take it anymore
I need someone to help me
To stand up and stand tall
To help me get past all the damage
To rise above it all
I'll rise above
And I won't look down
Regain what I once was
No longer will I be bound
I'll break your stranglehold
On my heart and soul
No longer will you be able
To keep me down in that hole

I want to close my eyes now
And forget all that we had
Forget the pain, forget the heartache
All the things that make me sad
I want to find a new love
And forget all about you
Forget the ways you manipulated me
And the hell you put me through
Forget the hell
Forget your face
Erase it all
Leave empty space
So that I can move on
And finally get past
These last twelve years
I've wasted in your trap