Thief

Don't forget to check your pulse, love at first sight is deadly.

Walking down the porcelain steps,

Her smile radiated throughout the room.

Her cordial gestures,

Enticed my soul.

 

The playful gleam timidly hid in her eyes,

They sought attention,

And received nothing less.

 

I checked my pulse,

And not a beat was found.

For she had stolen my heart,

And I had not her's yet.

 

An affable smile spread across my lips,

As I made my way toward her...

 

Reviews

[Ravyne Hawke]

You did an excellent job at describing the feelings behind love at first sight. The heart metaphor was dead-on. I love the affable smile.. gentle and gracious, the kind of smile that sucks you in. I don't think this intriguing lady stands a chance against the protagonist of this tale. Well done!

[Soma-ko]

Haha, I sure hope so; I believe the protagonist has a few tricks up his sleeves, so I'm sure he'll be fine. Glad you liked it.

[NA]

Simply wonderful...you did a great job with this...really enjoyed :)

[Soma-ko]

Thank you, and I'm happy you enjoyed it. :)

[SyberRose]

I enjoyed your words and liked the ending too...yes thats how you can tell when someone steals your heart....
you freeze and can't breathe haa...I remember that feeling...Rose

[Soma-ko]

Glad you liked it, still hasn't occurred to me yet, but hopefully it won't be too far away from what I perceive love to be.

[SyberRose]

I like the photo too

[Soma-ko]

Sadly, all of my photos are from Google... I love to draw as well, but it doesn't mean they're good drawing... Thankfully, I also enjoy others' drawing, instead of detest on how much better they are than I.

[SyberRose]

Im not an artist...I wish I was...I envy people who are.

[Soma-ko]

One can wish and hope for the world and not receive it. Have you ever tried taking classes?
Talent definitely gives artist the advantage, but hard work also shows merits.

[SyberRose]

No...I just assumed I would have know if I was talented in that area by now. my brother could draw...i was the poet and he was the artist

[Soma-ko]

Ah, well one that makes sense in away. One holds the key to a realm of words, while the other guards the gate of strokes. Is your entire family artist?

[SyberRose]

No...im the only poet and he died a few years back...he was the only artist...id like to see your drawings or paintings

[Soma-ko]

I regret my inquires now, hopefully in the future I'll draw something nice enough to show you. (I'll probably use it as my cover; you'll be able to tell because it'll be a photograph of it, since I'm not the best with copying and transferring photos).

[SyberRose]

Alright...great.

[RainbowBangles]

Really nice... And the ending. was awesome..