Why

inspired by the book Such a Pretty Girl by Laura Wiess

I sit on the bed

Listening to mommy and daddy fight

I cover my head with a pillow

Covering up the sound of yelling

They yell about money

They yell about me

Daddy tells mommy to leave

I hear the door slam

He comes into my room

Sits on my bed

Stroking my hair

With his hands

Shhh its ok

He whispers

Wiping the tears  

From my eyes

He takes his hand

Moves it up and down my thigh

I try to move

But his hand holds me firm

I plead him to stop

But he continues

Please stop I beg

He slaps me

Tells me to shut up

He gets on top of me

Doing his deed

I scream at him

When he left

I ask myself

Why

 

 

Author's Note

Honest opinion

Reviews

[MuSe Ampoule]

I second SpokenWord's analysis of this piece. Great perspective being from a child, though some clean-up editing could make it much more sharp...removing needless repetition would keep it from coming off contrived and trite.

Difficult subject matter deserves intelligent handling to be applicable for feelings of the readers to relate and this is where I have to differ from previous posts...there is a need for more feeling in this piece to be expressed. The writer touches on it, but it could be pushed a little further in my opinion. Specifically because it is from a 1st person POV. The child in this expresses little feeling about the fighting, and doesn't touch on the anticipatory anxiety of the act to come. What appears at the end feels of a repetitious happening to the reader so the character could display more anxiety in this.

This is a good piece and has potential to be better.

[Annie29]

Although the subject matter is not one to smile about, I do like this very much.

[LeDiisco]

Poems like these are always so sad... and the worst part is knowing that it actually happens to some people =[

[Calypso]

So emotionally powerful. This brings me to a part of my past I have been trying to forget. Wonderful write.

[Valentine]

This one tears at my soul as I would want to kill a man who molested one of mine...I am a Christian but abuse of children is one thing my dad was totally against...every kid should be lucky enough to have a dad like mine was..Valentine

[~jay-pee~>]

Definitely deep... I'm kind of speechless... It's reality and you do a great job expressing it.

[J.R.]

holy s**t

[hannahspelledbackwards]

A very tragic poem, but I love it.

[kill the innocents]

interesting topic.. it also says that how important that a child's right or say..

[Coyote Poetry]

A powerful and very sad poem. Anger and violence only bring pain and hurt to all people involve. A strong ending to a intense poem. A excellent poem. All children should know the rules and where to go for help. No excuse to hurt or wound a child.
Coyote

[paul]

why, indeed. extremely intense subject matter. i can't think of anything worse that could happen to a person.
really well written, exhibiting a great talent