Weary Lad

Weary Lad
By: Adam M. Snow

He gaze upon himself utterly;
not knowing, not knowing.
Should he ponder or sunder;
but his words not flowing,
but his words not flowing.
His thoughts a damsel, not quite a lady
His heart is young, his mind is shady.
But this gal he lust but lest he dream,
The gal he long the more she gleams.
He sought her again, once again
And once again, his heart speaks of her.
He gaze upon himself utterly;
not knowing, not knowing.
Should he ponder or sunder;
but his words not flowing,
but his words not flowing.
He quiver with fear as she draws near;
This young lad's love is all he had.
Despair follows in the quake of his steps,
He waits for her with every pep.
He speaks only of her but dreams of her forever.
Surely these two souls are destined to be,
But he remains alone in the far distant sea.

Reviews

[_]

*runs around in a circle* So beautiful and romantic!

[Victoria PoetryBunny]

I love this, such a hopeless romantic feeling in this. Love the ending two lines, and of course the rhyming which seems so effortless, such a great flow.

[Amila Jay]

This is a beautiful write :))

[Ripple of Aqua]

I love on how you can tell just how nervous this guy is by the repetition, as if it was an unsteady beat of his thoughts and hearts.

[jennifer little]

good poem

[TL Boehm]

Lyrical melancholy. Well penned and emotive.

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem. I could feel the distance and the desire in this amazing poem. Love can be painful when a sea separate a dream of love and happiness. Great description allow the reader to feel the desire and need. Thank you for the outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Renée]

Adam as always I adore your style of writing ( : I do agree with changing the gal to girl idea..but its only an opinion

[Shep]

The words flow like a song. I really enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing.

[Elaenor Aisling]

i really like this, but if i may be so bold as to make a suggestion: if you could replace 'gal' with girl, it would give it a more mature and elegant tone. Other than that, lovely work.