The Proposal

When two people are in a long-term relationship, but on different pages, how does the relationship continue? Or does it end?

Samuel and Jane were going to their favorite restaurant in New York City, Isabella’s Osteria. They consistently agreed the pasta was the best they could find even if NYC had an endless amount of choices. Samuel had reserved a private dining area for 2 as it was an incredibly special night for the both of them. Seven years together and now in their mid-twenties, the thought of their impending futures continuously clouded their minds. Jane finished her plate of pasta and Samuel finished his as he ordered a second glass of wine for each of them. Casual conversation and laughter occupied most of the night until it was time for the big moment that could not get out of Samuel’s head since waking up that morning.

He bent down with only his left knee touching the ground while his right hand reached for a small navy blue ring box that had been hidden in his jacket pocket all night. Holding it in Jane’s direction, his left hand reached for the top half of the box and opened it to reveal the most perfect, round, just beautiful opal ring. She looked at it with an expression that was difficult for Samuel to read. The two individuals were in love! At least, they were for seven years today, June 11th. Why would her response be anything but excitement and pure happiness to be with someone with that connection to her?

Complete sadness and an overwhelming resentment took over as she realized a few things at that moment. The first thing to cross her mind was the validation that she should have said something long ago. The second thought is that this is going to be an extreme blow to his life, his mindset, and his future. This was something she did not want to be responsible for, but nobody has the power to change inevitability. Lastly, he never really knew her at all, which brought on anger towards the obliviousness to her feelings. How could he think marriage was an acceptable path to take?

“No, Samuel. We shouldn’t do this.”

She spoke after maybe five seconds of assessing and processing the situation, her voice quiet and shaky, yet definitive and as if she had thought this many times before. She could not take her eyes off of this gorgeous piece of jewelry that represented so many things that will never become a reality.

Although it was known through logic that this was a potential outcome to what he looked at as his grand thought-out gesture, Samuel’s heart shattered as he remained on his knee frozen in shock. The only sound that was heard in the next few seconds was the sound of the navy blue box closing, forcing Jane to look at the face of her long-time boyfriend. Immediately looking into the eyes of someone she used to be so deeply in love with solidified what she was doing, making her realize the moment she had thought about so often throughout the last year was happening right here and right now.

After registering her answer and thinking back to any possible sign this was the likely response she could have given him before this moment, Samuel finally spoke.

“Shouldn’t we?”

“Samuel, I’m so sorry.” Jane said, bothered by how this sentence came out but knew that nothing she said could fix how this will affect both of their lives. “I really don’t think we should.” Tears were now forming in her eyes, one tear making an early escape rolling down towards the corner of her mouth.

“I don’t understa-” Samuel began, but was cut off by Jane.

“Please let me say some things. I’ve been wanting to have this talk for a long time, but didn’t know how to do it.” Samuel silently stood up and sat back in the chair that he used to be so hopeful sitting in just minutes before. “If I had known you would be planning this, I would have convinced myself to have this conversation with you months ago, but I knew I wasn’t being myself. I had assumed you could tell too, but didn’t want to accept the change between us. It turns out you just weren’t paying attention.” Her voice shook again, this time with a bit of anger. 

His face changed at the sound of that sentence. It seemed to be a mixture of pain with only a hint of annoyance. “I didn’t assume that it was me you were upset about all this time. I kept assuming it was anything else. Why wouldn’t you come to me if you needed to talk about something like you always have? Why would I think that our relationship was on the line? I want to marry you.” Samuel had his own tear making its way down his face, but knew he was not going to allow any more to do the same. He could not get emotional about this yet. He was busy attempting to save what they have built together over the last seven years of their lives.

“Because this was different and I knew that saying anything out loud would make it real, like right now.” She was holding back letting everything loose and just sobbing now. This had to finish before she allowed herself that release. “We’ve been together since we were 18 and now, so much has changed. We’ve tried talking about the future and we want different things. I’m going to leave and move back to California.”

Uprooting and leaving a life that you have had for almost a decade is expensive and risky. At least moving back somewhere close to her hometown would not make this purely a fresh start, but a fresh start with comfort and familiarity just miles away.

“So you’re not only blindsiding me, but you’re leaving a state away?:” He knew she was moving hours away, not too close but not too far. The new emotion of anger began to creep into his current mindstate, but mostly confusion. As every kind of relationship to ever exist, they were never perfect. As stated before, Samuel always knew this was possible, but not once did he consider that she would be physically leaving soon after this news broke. This may make things more difficult, or would it be easier for her? She already made up her mind that she wanted plenty of space between them for this to be officially behind them.

“Samuel, please understand this isn’t easy for me either.”
“Then why are you doing this? Why didn’t you say yes?” The annoyance was a bit more clear than before, but only subtly.

“I want to live in LA. I want to travel around the world. You don’t like the idea of doing this with me and you’ve said that before in other conversations. Am I wrong?” He stared at the ground in silence, neither denying or confirming what she said, but they both know it’s true. “I want you to stay here and become the best journalist the New York Times has ever seen. Isn’t that what you want? For both of us to follow our dreams and be happy, whether we are apart or together?”

He became unable to look into her eyes any longer without tears escaping his tear ducts. In his mind, he still could not allow her to see this in their final moments together, so instead he looked down at the table where he was leaning on his elbows, hands clasped together on top of the table. After a moment, he regained some strength and looked her in the eyes to say these next words. “I do want both of us to be happy. But why can’t we do it together? Love involves sacrifices.”

“It does not have to involve sacrifice to that level.” Please, let him understand. “I truly believe love is out there where we can have it all. Together, I just don’t see how that’s possible. We aren’t young and in high school anymore. We’re adults who know what direction we want to go in.”

He put his head in his hands for a brief time allowing his thoughts to finalize into a coherent thought. All he kept thinking of is how he could stop this, how he could never have bought the ring and instead asked her why she was upset all of those times instead of leaving her alone to sort out her thoughts while he happily went along with how things were. They sat in silence for a few moments until Jane went on.

“I can figure out a place to stay if this is too difficult.” Was this the right thing to do? She knew in that moment it was, as the feeling of relief was ever so slowly making its way into her conscience.

“No, it’s your home too, even now. I’ll sleep on the couch.” He spoke while lifting his head up and decided to stand up. “Should we go back to the house? Let’s just take time to sleep on this. We can talk more tomorrow.” He checked the time on his watch and called the server over for the check.

She whispered “Thank you.” What an amazing person, a beautiful part of humanity. He deserves someone who does not constantly think of a future without him being a part of it. She thought to herself how she also deserves someone on board with her needs and wants due to their life-changing nature.

They sat in silence for the next few minutes as he paid for the dinner and then they walked out together to the car. They made their way home in silence, and got ready to sleep in separate rooms for the first time in years. In the past, there had been arguments that have escalated to the point of this same sleeping situation. This however, felt exceptionally different. They both could feel the finality of the night, how the course of both of their lives has now been set in stone to be changed. It seemed so interesting to them in their own individual thoughts how one night, one moment, only a few minutes of time, could make such absolute change whether for the better or worse. Does anyone ever truly know what is better or worse in the moment of a situation unfolding and presenting itself?

The relationship was over. Or had it just evolved into something painful, exciting, or new?

Author's Note

This is my first story ever written so I'm ready to accept feedback and criticism! I wanted to portray a possible real life situation while only going through the specific moment. The entire story takes place within less than an hour and yet it seems as if so much happen, just like reality at times.