Chapter 16

Chapter 16

The next morning

The sun shining in the naked window lands right on my face. I can't help but be awaken. I lay in bed for awhile though, perhaps trying to go back to sleep or no motivation to get up. The first thing that popped into my head when I awoke was that today was the day when the adventure begins. I kind of wish that I could just close my eyes and when I open them I am at home in my own bed. With my mom reeking of alcohol kissing me when I wake up every morning. I miss just hanging out with Josh, drinking and smoking, out in the middle of nowhere. I miss playing frisbee with Jes and taking my Hydrocodons to make the day feel brighter and better. I miss my life.

I finally come to my senses enough to roll over and look at Jessica, but she wasn't there. It kind of left me upset at myself knowing that she was already up and ready to go while I was laying here bed not even wanting to continue. Just feeling sorry for myself...Yeah, that's what I'm doing...Felling sorry for myself. I finally build up the energy to get out of bed and walk down the dark hallway. I make a quick stop by the bathroom to piss. As I'm pissing I look at myself in the mirror, I have dark bags under my eyes and my clothes resemble dirty rags. I didn't realize until now how scared I was to start out on our own again. It is kind of comforting here with Tom, even though I barely know him. I suppose we have to do this to get back home and I really am home sick now. As I look into this mirror I can't help but be disgusted with myself. Maybe I wouldn't be stuck in this situation if I wasn't so big on drugs. Anyone else in the world would have stopped after an old man threatened them and there loved ones. Although my stubborn a*s didn't even think about stopping. This whole thing is my fault and I just want to lie back down and cry my eyes out. I can't, not right now anyway. I have to be strong for Jessica. I can't let her see how scared I am, as soon as I walk out of this bathroom then I'll have to hide my fear. I walk out of the bathroom and down the dark hallway. Entering the open room I notice that Jessica is sitting on the couch with a backpack next to her. Tom is in the kitchen making some type of food, it smells like eggs and sausage again. I'm not complaining though. I joined Jes on the couch.

"So what's in the bag hun?" I asked her while I gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Tom gave us some crackers, water, blankets and five packs of cigarettes."

"Well that was really nice of him." I wasn't expecting to get all that. I'm really thankful to have met Tom, Jes and I would probably be dead without him, but I knew we had to leave and it was going to be hard, there is no doubt about that. Right about then he brings us two plates of food. Plates consisting of two eggs, three sausages, toast with butter, and a fork. The smell of the food makes my mouth water. As I eat the food and occasionally peak over I don't say a thing. Neither does she, not even looking up from the plate until she is finished. Her and I finish about the same time, I take out one of the pack of cigarettes and hand one to her. Waiting for time to leave felt like time was barely creeping by. As soon as I light up my cigarette Tom comes to take the plates, walks down the hallway then returns moments later. Jes and I rise to our feet and I strap on the backpack. Tom heads for the door and we follow. Nothing was said, we all knew what to do. I'm not sure why nobody was talking, I think it might be because we were nervous. Jes and I are nervous for each other and ourselves and Tom is nervous for us. We were going to be out in the middle of nowhere again and I'm know that the Justin's father was around somewhere. That is what scared me the most. I'm far from a man of God, but I can't help but pray that he doesn't find us. Last night I had a dream that we were waving down cars, and finally one came to a stop. Stopping right next to us then rolling down the window. As soon as we were able to see inside, we were looking right into the barrel of that tranquilizer gun. I'm sure you can guess what happens next.

Almost into town now, there hasn't been that much talking at all. The plan is that Tom will walk into to town and get us heading in the right direction, then we are off on our own. All alone. It turns out that I hadn't slept as late as I thought, the sun had just risen when I woke up. It is probably seven or eight o'clock now, which means we have plenty of daylight to work with. I also wonder where we are going to sleep, I suppose in the woods like we used to. Every time Jes and I talked about the journey I told her that we are most likely going to catch a car, but in my head I don't expect that at all. Even if we do it definitely won't be on the deserted dirt roads that we have at least a few days on. I don't care, as long as she is alright. It's hard to believe how much our love has grown in the past couple weeks. In trials like this it is enough to put any relationship to the test, although not one argument has come between us. Which obviously is a good thing.

"Well this is it guys." Tom says looking straight ahead down the seemingly never ending dirt road.

"So...I really appreciate everything you've done for us." I said, not sure quite sure how to read it.

"Yes, we probably wouldn't be here without you." Jessica added.

"I just regret that I can't just drive you home or something. I do wish you the greatest of luck."

After an awkward silence I decided to say good-bye. "I suppose we better be on out way to get the bext time." Tom finally looked down at me, but instead of having his serious stern eyes he looked sensitive and sympathetic, even sad. "Once again thank you and take care Tom."

"Yes, I'm going to miss ya man." Jessica said, she looked like she was going to cry.

"Well good luck you guys. I'm going to miss your company guys." He said then leaned in to give us hugs which was the last thing I was expecting him to do.

So we walk away down the empty, lonely road. I look back at Tom who is walking the opposite direction and not looking back. The sun is bright and hot, I know it is only going to get hotter. I was already sick of walking from the walk into town. We walked faster this time into town, I'm not sure why but it only took about thirty minutes. I think we should probably keep the same pace. I mean, if I had the energy I would run the whole way if it would get us home faster. Though I know that would be near impossible. So we walk...and walk some more.

So it is nightfall now. I can see about ten feet all around me and that is about it. The first and front layer of trees are visible, then behind that it looks like the world just ends. At this point I kind of wish it was right now. My legs hurt and I feel like I could sleep for days. I keep trying to tell myself that we are almost home, then I remember the truth.

"Can we stop now?" Jes asked. Looking over at her I notice that she can barely walk. She looks as exhausted as she did in the woods.

"Yeah, I was thinking about the same thing." I smiled and she smiled back.

I sit down on the edge of the road and take the back pack off. It feels great to take a break and get a load of my feet.

"It's probably a good idea to be off the side of the road." Jes mentioned, which she was totally right. As I look out into the woods I wasn't to thrilled about going out into them. It was dark, creepy and quiet out there. I really wish we would of seen a car and at least been able to use a phone or something.

I dig through the pack for a flashlight that Tom had left us, once I found it I turn it on and look out into the woods. I don't see anywhere that looks like somewhere I'd want to sleep, but then again if I had a choice I would sleep out here anyway. I grab Jessica's hand and carefully walk down the small hill that stops at a ditch off the side of the road. Walking slowly, pretty much creeping, we continue out into the woods. I hear a crunching noise so I quickly shine my light to the right where I think the noise came from. Nothing, it was probably just my imagination. God...this sucks. Being completely silent I look for a clear spot on the ground. Then I see it, Its a big rock that has a flat top, just enough room for two people. Maybe we are going to have a little bit of luck anyhow.

"There!" I say, pretty excited to find out that we don't have to sleep on the ground. We jog over to the rock and Jes lays out one of the blankets on the rock. We sit on the blanket and she gets out the other one to cover us up. I slowly lay down for my legs are extremely sore, I imagine hers are as well.

"So how long do think it will take us to get home?" She asked.

"Probably three more days." She looked at me so I lean over and kiss her. "God I wish we had a joint right now."

"You aren't kidding." We laugh, for the first time in days. "Cigarette?"

"You read my mind." She hands me a cigarette and we smoke them staring up at the stars. There happens to be a clearing in the trees, which makes it nice for us. After we finish I kiss her and say goodnight. I didn't think I was going to sleep worth s**t, but I fell right asleep.

Lost in a deep sleep I start to feel drops on my face. I slowly try to retain my vision. As soon as I get my eyes open enough to realize it's raining a raindrop falls right into my eyes. Causing me to sit up and rub my eyes. Jessica was waking up just as I was. Once we realize what is going on we quickly gather up the blankets and as I stuff them into the backpack Jessica slips and falls off the rock. Landing on her feet and slipping onto her butt. I lean over the edge off the rock to see if she is okay, only to see her laughing at herself. I start laughing with her. Once the blankets are in the backpack, I toss it off the edge and quickly follow. Landing right next to Jes I hold my hand out for her to take it. Once she does I lift her to her feet and kiss her. By now it is pouring, we are both drenched. Jessica looks me in the eyes gives me another quick peck and then pulls away laughing and giggling. She starts spinning around her hands in the air enjoying the rain. I couldn't blame her, the day was warm and with this slightly chilled rain it felt great. Dripping with water didn't bother us a bit. I'm not sure what caused it but Jes and I just laughed, danced, and ran around through the woods in the rain. I honestly forgot about the fact that we were kidnapped, tortured, and on an what seemed like everlasting venture to get back home. Every few minutes we would slip and fall on the wet forest floor and fall flat on our butts or even our backs. It doesn't bother us, right now...nothing does.

As we start the daily hike back on the road again still soaked and it is still raining, not nearly as hard though. Nothing has changed whatsoever, The dirt road still looked the same along with the woods that lined both sides. Not only do I get tired from walking I get extremely bored. I light up a cigarette and hand them to Jes for her to do the same. We haven't really talked since we started walking again, for we trying to catch our breath. Running around for awhile has a tendency to wear someone out.

"Well that was fun." I say once I'm able to.

"Absolutely." She takes a hit of her cigarette and continues. "I think we should look at this trip differently from now on." I just look at her with sort of a puzzled look, so she explains. "We have been miserable ever since we left Tom's. I know this is a hard trip and sometimes the conditions don't make life any easier. Though if you really think about it, we escaped from the psycho killer guy and we are fine and in one piece. We met a nice guy and got some food. Even though it's just crackers and water, it's enough to keep us alive and pretty comfortable." Another hit of the cigarette and then looks up into the sky. Doesn't just look at it, but it's as if she looks into the sky. "It's a beautiful day even if it is raining a little bit. We are on our way home, even if we can't get a ride we will make it there sooner or later and our lives will be back to normal. We can drink, play frisbee, and have fun again." I couldn't help but think of Josh, and I'm sure she did to because her gaze went from the sky to the ground in front of her. Neither one of us dare to say anything, for Jessica was exactly right about everything. I couldn't agree more with everything she said and I feel kind of stupid for not seeing it before.

"You're absolutely right sweetie" I take my last drag and toss the butt of the cigarette into the road and smile. We stop and look into each other eyes for a minute. while holding each others hands. "So let's make this a new start right now..."

"...Starting right this time." She took the words right out of my mouth.

As we rest our foreheads upon each others and smile. I hear whistling.

"Do you hear that?" I ask stepping away from her down the road. Stopping a listening for a moment and then she hears it as well.

"I do! Hello?!" She calls down the road. There was no answer so we just stand in place listening to the whistling as it gets closer. The anticipation was something terrible, although I don't know why. If we can hear whistling and they haven't gotten into sight yet then there is no car, which means no ride. I suppose there could be a phone.

We see him! An old man riding a bicycle, very slowly and relaxed. Whistling away as if he is in his own world. Swaying to the left and right as he rides down the road with his one foot long gray beard swaying in the wind. Long gray hair past his shoulders lay down flat as wet as ours are. For his clothes are just as wet, and then the old man spots us. A big smiled grows upon his face, which is partially covered by his gray moustache. He looked like a jolly old man, the only thing that didn't look right about this man was how skinny he is. The poor guy looks like he is anorexic, you can see his veins and practically his bones everywhere. The t-shirt and shirts he is wearing is way to big for him and he looks along the lines of a hobo stereotype. Once he gets about twenty feet away he waves and gets off his bike to walk the rest of the way, even though he was probably going about the same speed on the bike.

The old man nods his head. "Well, well....What are you kids doing out here?" He smiled and pulled out a cigarette. Even though I just smoked one I did the same.

"Well finding our way home." Jessica answered. "I may ask you the same thing."

"I'm just riding around this wonderful state. I'm a drifter along with this bike, every question I have I answer myself. Every fear I had, It's been conquered before. I do what I can, I am who I am and life is great." The old man searched through a backpack he had on his back as well. His little clever introduction was interesting.

"Why?" I asked, not really sure why I asked the question I was curious of what type of answer I was going to get back.

"I feel there is more to the world than materials. I've experienced all the great things in life like love, compassion, honesty, freedom, plenty of freedom. Don't get me wrong my life is all good, but I try to find the good out it all." After he finishes the old man continues to dig through his pack.

"We were just talking about that." Jessica added. "How we should look at life in a better way...We may have a few days of walking though it has been a beautiful enjoyment." She looked at me as if waiting for me to agree, so I nodded in agreement.

"I have something that will help keep an open/optimistic mind." The old man holds out his hand with two tiny little plastic bags. Inside the plastic bags were two little pieces of paper. Jes and I each take one and I flip it around and it was completely white. I knew what it was; LSD. "It's acid." He said. I just looked at him and nodded I didn't feel like giving him a smart-a*s comment.

"Thanks man." Jessica said. she seemed very excited to have it, on the other hand I wasn't that excited. I have never done it and drugs kind of got us into this situation. Once I saw how she felt about it though , it made me feel a lot better.

"No problem guys. You kids enjoy and I have to be on my way back out into this great big world. So much to see." Riding off he waves without looking back, so we wave knowing he can't see us but it seemed like the proper thing to do.

We start walking looking at the paper inside the bag. Jes got more excited each passing second, so I tried to do the same. After a while of looking at it from a good point of view I got so I honestly was excited about doing acid. It would make this trip a lot more interesting.

"So when do you want to take it?" I ask her.

"Whenever you want to hun."

"I suppose we can do it now, if you want." I look at her and I see her eyes light up.

"I was hoping you would say that sweetie." She jumps up and hugs me. "I haven't done acid in awhile and I'm really excited."

"Do you think I'll be alright, I've never done it."

"Of course, it is just like shrooms you have to just go with the flow. Whatever happens when your tripping just accept it and be open-minded. It's good we are starting now too, because we won't be tripping as hard when it turns dark out here.

So Jessica sticks out her tongue and puts the strip of paper on it. So I do the same and rest it on my tongue. I close my mouth and continue on walking. I even take out a cigarette, but quickly remember that I have it in my mouth. I put the cigarette in my ear.

"Look at that! Let's go hang out there for a little while." Jes pointed a to sunny spot out on the woods where the sun broke through the trees. I see a few fresh logs laying on the ground so I nod my head and we head off the road and into the woods. As I rest on a log and enjoy the scenery along with the relaxation of sitting. Jessica wanders around as if she is looking for something. Crouching over and looking around a tree she trips over a root. Too tired to rise to my feet I kind of scoot to my right hoping to confirm that she is alright, of course she is and I feel kind of stupid for stressing. Giggling she climbs to her feet and takes a few steps towards me. For some damn reason she is crouched over the whole time as if she was trying to pick something up, however she is looking me in the eyes while doing it. About five feet away from me she stops and reaches her finger into her mouth to slowly pull the acid strip out of her mouth. Just as Jes had told me, nothing was on it. She held up to my face for a minute, while looking at it herself.

As I take mine out she holds her hand out to stop me almost hitting me in the nose. "Nope!" I look at her funny at first, but then it all clicked. Jessica is already tripping, that’s why she is able to take hers out. As I remove my hand from my mouth, she falls on the ground, "Not until…" Pausing for a moment to pick up a leaf and look at it. Throwing it up in the air, she continues; "You’re like…You feel like…ME!" She yells out.

I have seen Jessica drunk, high, tripping, hyper, sad, mad, a little crazy, although this behavior surprises even me. I sit on that moss-covered log watching her lay in the leaves, to occasionally pick one up and stare at it. Feeling really weak and a little bit lightheaded I slowly lay down on the log, not caring one bit that I noticed at the bottom of the log there is an anthill. Before I knew it my stomach dropped as if I had been strapped into an airplane heading straight into earth from thousands of feet in the air. The light giggle that Jes is giving off was pretty much unnoticeable a moment ago. Now…It seems like my brain is the one laughing. It is laughing. My brain is laughing at me. I have no doubt about it. I close my eyes expecting everything to go black and maybe calm down; on the contrary, all I can see is colors. As the colors move faster and faster so does my stomach.

"Jes…What’s going on?" Forcing my eyes open and then struggling to sit up I find myself on my side lying on the ground. "I can’t do this." I manage to make the colors go away by opening my eyes, only to find that sight doesn’t comfort me in the slightest little bit. What were once dead leaves, that had taken beautiful colors and shapes on the forest floor, is now a big blur that seems to be pulsating with my increasingly fast heartbeat. "Get this out of me…now. Please….Jes?" No answer.

Using all of my strength to get on my feet left me feeling as if I had just climbed mile-high mountain. Catching my breath and feeling my rapid heartbeat pulse throughout my whole body, I look around for Jessica. No sight of her only scares me more. Staring out into what I hoped to God is woods, sends me into a frantic; panic driven spin. I’m not sure why for that only made things worse. Falling to my knees and stopping I made the mistake of closing my eyes once again. Not for long…I quickly came to regret that decision.

"Okay Ian, It’s okay. Just take a deep breath and calm down."

As much as I try to do so the loud, ear pounding heartbeat got stronger. So much so that it starts affecting my vision. Every time I hear the beat, the trees that surround me get a little closer. I slowly put my hands to my chest to realize that they are walking. The trees are walking slowly but surely closer and closer. On top of all this my body feel like all this has been going on for hours. I can’t figure out if my brain is tricking me into thinking time is going faster or slower. It feels as if this is all happening at an extremely slow pace, though my brain is racing faster that I would have ever thought was possible.

"Jessica!" I yell at the tops of my lungs. "Get this s**t out of me! I am not as strong as you…not as strong as you." Turning my head and looking around I see a tree within inches of my face. I slowly life my head and see it reaching bare, rotting, jagged braches down at me. "F**k...Fu-This!"

I take off, jumping to feet and sprinting in the opposite direction. Focused on the fact that it felt like that just happened in slow motion, I take about five or six long strides as fast as my body will let me. I look back to see if the tree is following, surely it’s not. Once again I quickly regret the decision to look back for I feel my legs run straight into something sending me flying like Superman through the air. With everything in slow motion I realize that my shin was stabbed with something. I don’t know what; hell, I don’t even know what I ran into. Hitting the ground hard sends a horrible; piercing pain throughout my whole body. For a moment the whole world is black. With the exception of my muscle spasms from the pain, I lay motionless trying to keep nothing disturbed. Once again I start tripping again, as the black grows lighter from a very dark purple to blue. Before I could even think about what was happening, a world comes into view. Now I’m not certain if it is reality, but at this point there is no point of telling. Instead of colors changing rapidly, they are slowly shifting from shade to shade, almost too slow to tell. A warm wave of comfort flows in my body throughout every vein, organ, and every nerve in that I have. Pushing my heavy yet weak body upright, I just stare straight ahead. Though everything is slowly swaying, involuntarily I start swaying back and forth…almost like a dance. Instead of scaring me, the colors bring me joy. From the left to the right I sway; squinting every time I put any weight on my right leg. I talk myself into keeping my eyes off from it, for it just doesn’t seem important.

"Jessica! Where are you sweetie?" Calling her name repeatedly and pacing around the woods looking. To be completely honest every few minutes I will get distracted by something and completely forget to look for Jessica.

Leaning up against a tree, I see the most beautiful thing that has ever existed. It’s a sparkling water-fall! More excited than ever I run over to the painting-like masterpiece made by Mother Nature herself. Dropping to my knees and leaning in to let the water caress my hand, I am immediately surprised by what I feel. It is not water I feel falling…It is the color blue. The color blue runs down my arm so smooth, almost as if I hadn’t disturbed the flow at all. It is hard to explain, though I do know that blue feels good…Very good.