From the inside, out!

A repulsion between personality and person...

Dear diary..

Sometimes I speak to myself as I wonder at best, when at times I find that I am twirling alone..

Lost in a world of oblivion, not really sure of the ripples beginning but indeed they grow bigger and spread through the river that runs into the open ocean.  

Change is vital but the consequences do not always work out as they had been planned. Puppets of the numbers that appear on a dice that is rolled by another determining the destination of only your own future but which has the influence of so many other players that the control of the game is put into the hands of the maker. 

Feelings are all so complicated and complex which have no one cause or effect yet they demand an explanation and need to understand the root.  

Life goes on as death draws nearer because this is the inevitable cycle to which there is no end.

I spent the past in search of the present and in a hope for making a future. I have no passion yet I built a wall of ambitions and some goals that I need to achieve. Turn this being of existence into something that matters and then my aim is complete. Yet to whom am I to make a difference I still do not know. For who do I live I still do not believe.

An inner voice speaks:

Find your inspiration, live your ideal, and make life what you dream….

You hold the key, 

you have the power, 

your mind is the spell 

and your hands do the magic. 

The mind knows all, 

the heart is wise, 

and you know what you need to do… 

Be the person you are inside, do not be afraid, let go of all that you held and reach out for help when you are ready to help yourself. 

Someone loves you.... A spirit will guide you.  Know this! 

Believe this! Stay firm…. And all else will fall into place…

Such is life that every moment is a full stop in itself. No one know which full stop will be their last but on will life they will go, seldom giving death a thought.. Upon hearing that you have a life span preparations will be made yet rarely will your hear a tear from a thought that I might not see the end of the hour...

I continue to speak unto myself as an answer to this voice: 

Who I am? Who was she? Will I be remembered? I have no personality but so much I want to be.. 

There is no time... 

The Inner voice is back: 

No time, no time, get on with it.. 

You can make it happen.. 

Splash out, 

Burst open, 

Leave your mark...

Author's Note

A jumble from a mixed diary entry.. What do you make of it?
What do you think of these feelings?

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

"Be the person you are inside, do not be afraid, let go of all that you held and reach out for help when you are ready to help yourself. "
Very good wisdom in your poem. We must read deep and be fearless in hope and in dreams. No weakness in the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[caseya]

I really like this very well explained and the feelings are very clear good write