Photograph of A Reflection

my fave

Peering in through the glass,

Peering in so I don’t have to ask—

Rays of sunlight dash across my

Reflected face as I

Feel the camera flash.

A moment caught in history,

A moment and a wish to be—

A wish to be

As the memories are:

Dancing in black and white squares,

Dancing on through all their cares.

 

Peering in through the glass,

Peering in so I don’t have to ask—

Watch them staring back at me,

Wonder what they see,

What they see,              What they see

With their ageless eyes as they

Stare back through me

As they swirl on the black and white banquet floor—

The future to fear no more.

 

Rays of sunlight dash across my

Reflected face as I

Wonder what my

Clone feels—

Clone sees—

Clone that twists and fades back and forth in the bright

Clone reflection made of nothing more than sunlight.

 

Feel the camera flash:

A moment caught in history,

A moment and a wish to be—

A wish to smile

Like the second me,

To have no worries,

To have no fears,

To spring to life when the sun appears,

To die—at night—and shed no tears.

 

A wish to be

As the memories are:

Dancing in black and white squares,

Dancing on through all their cares.

But they shall pass,

Shall all pass,

And one day,

I will look at my captured reflection and see—

See in the age of the camera flash—

Though it smiles,

Though it waves with twinkling eyes,

My reflection—

It lies:

It is not I.

 

Reviews

[SM Davis]

Peering in through the glass,
Peering in so I don't have to ask-
Watch them staring back at me,
Wonder what they see,
What they see, What they see
With their ageless eyes as they
Stare back through me

Beautiful!! I can certainly see why this is one of your favorites. You've done a spectacular job is bringing the reader through what is felt by looking at these photographs. These memories...

Almost as if they could be the memories of the reader as well. Very well done!
As they swirl on the black and white banquet floor-

The future to fear no more.

[Dressed in Poetry]

I commented on this before it got deleted, but I shall do it again.

I think this is one of your best poems. It is full of imagery, amazing diction, and all that other English crap that is actally very good for writing, I must admit.

I like the repetition of the dancing and the reflection.

Over all, this is so amazing. It makes me jealous.

[Edward Clay]

the title first dragged me into this. Firstly, because of the aesthetic it created in my head. A photograph can portray so much, and the ideaof a reflection can create many different ideas already before I've even read the poem. I think the title could stand as a poem itself!

But anyway, on with the poem. I love the first 5 lines - the rhyme in it is actually fantastic! The delayed rhyme on the 5th line with the 2nd creates a tempo (flash and ask), a beat - like wind chimes under a beaten day. And this complimented the repetition then in line 2 of the word peering, which might i add is a great word.

the repetition of the first stanza itself is something which works with a degree of beauty about it- it bounces charmingly momentarily before coming to an end - a brief moment to reflect. reminds me of a car journey to an extent.

the first problem i found with this poem was at the start of the second stanza, where you repeated the start or stanza 1 again, which i found to be a shame, as the poem had an original tone and it felt like you were plagerising yourself. But it works for the second stanza independantly - maybe a slight change, a word or two just to make it slightly different may work. but thats just me.

"What they see, What they see
With their ageless eyes as they
Stare back through me" I like the feel of this part.

the rest of the poem follows suit in a mesmerising repetition, a display - it's like a song dance, bird flight - twisting in and out. and the execution is one which fits in nicely; jigsaw.

sorry, ive rambled incessantly here, but i've taken a liking to this poem.

[Ashlee]

Love the way you sectioned the poem off. I really enjoy your writing. I also like the way that you seem to see things that others don't see in your picture. I also like the way it seemed like there was a sorta echo in the first and second paragraphs. I thought it was an echo. It seemed like you ment for this to be about how you let others see you and you see your faults and everything in your reflection and you realize that you lied in your picture. I still really loved this piece of work. It's one of the best that I have read.