An out of the box touchdown - senryu

I'm in your end zone
Can you see my outstretched arms?
Please pass me your heart.

Reviews

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Excellent use of metaphor in a flowing senryu!

[B]

Lol
That is so cute

Love the football references lol

[SleeplessVolcano]

Maybe I'be been watching too many American football movies.....lol......maybe I should rather watch sumo wrestling....:P

[B]

Nooooo lol

[Fabian G. Franklin]

A fine football metaphor. I enjoyed the poem even if I'm not allowed to enjoy the game any longer.

[SleeplessVolcano]

Thank you. Surely you can enjoy the game from the side-lines?

[Fabian G. Franklin]

The politics and protests have ruined it for me. It's a billionaires game played by millionaires complaining of injustice. Any other place in the world this would be laughable. But it is ironic.

[Einstein Noodle]

oh i love this highly sentimental journey in senryu form ... in your second line i sense and imagine all the long journey it was to get there ..shy hellos, small significant gifts maybe ..a malt at the drug store (use to have them) ;)
i'm in the end zone..pass me your heart ..love this sir .. it is a classic keeper for sure!
E.

[SleeplessVolcano]

thanks Big E. I've been hovering between Middle Earth and Atlantis for a while.....feels good to get onto Writer's Cafe's end-zone again....:) though with my luck, I'd probably drop the ball! Thanks for commenting.

[Einstein Noodle]

between Middle Earth and Atlantis ..mwahvelous my friend simply mwahvelous ... i never was much of a ball player either ... 4ft 11 inches and 98 lbs. until i turned 40 it seemed ;)

[SleeplessVolcano]

Growing in stature gives us a few inches, right? ;). Our gray hair must attest to something I hope :)

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahha YES ...i am sure it does my friend! :)))))