What I Can't Escape

the emotion that has baffled men since the dawn of time

It hurt when I gave you back to her…

 

And it hurts that I’m giving up now…

 

And I can lie to myself,

Pretending this is nothing,

Telling myself that it was pointless to try.

We are both too stubborn,

Hindered by cause

Of our own jagged edges.

 

But I won’t lie.

Not while I hold this pen.

 

I’m a coward.

 

As much as I wish

To lay my head on your chest

And oh how I fantasize

Of your arms around my waist

Holding me as you once did,

Your scent, intoxicating against your breath,

Dizzying my senses..

And oh how I wish

That it was different.

That we both weren’t so messed up,

That you would come to me,

Quit the pretending

Let me know

Never let me go

Tell me with your lips

Because I see it in your eyes…

 

Oh, how I wish it were different.

Because I can only keep wishing.

Your mixed signals do

nothing for my lack of confidence.

Pain blossoms within me as you ignore me

And oh how I wish I could feel differently.

I wish I didn’t feel this way

I hate that I’ve written so many poems about

You.

 

What makes you so special?

Why can’t I get rid of this feeling—this

Throb in my heart that I can never escape…

Author's Note

My intentions were not entirely poetic as I wrote this. I did it with no other purpose in mind other than for release. It may come across as unfinished but it felt pretty finished to me as I was writing.

Reviews

[Bandersnach]

This is really beautiful. I love the part where you say you're a "coward," and it makes me think of all the things I've never had the courage to speak, but only dared to write about. This piece goes to show you that a poem doesn't need to rhyme in order to make an impression. I think everyone needs a "release" every-now-and-then, and I personally think that's when people write their best; when emotion is raw and real and flows from your fingertips (so to speak, lol). Great work, keep it up :)

[Tony]

I like this. It seems pretty real..... Ain't love grand?!
Why just let old loves die when we can wallow in our miserable skins?
Good work, Seeker.

[Micah_s5]

I liked it. It gave me some flashbacks as I read over some of the words. The pain of losing someone and not knowing why you care for so long and it just lingers with you.

[Jess.]

Wow, I love this! It doesn't seem unfinished to me at all.
And I can relate to just about this whole thing....though I wish I didn't, but I do.
I really do like the part about the mixed signals, lack of confidence and "I hate that I've written so many poems about you" Those I can relate to the most.
But, "What makes you so special?" is my favorite.
Amazing write!