Question, why did you use (Illumines) the only third person references in your poem rather than Illuminating?
I like the concept and your descriptive lines are express and imaginative almost philosophical in nature, but I was disappointed with the ending expecting the building of your poem to explode with a moral impact ending. Still a very good poem and a pleasure to read, I give it four out of five Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
Thank you for the read and review :) I suppose I pay more attention to how things sound rather than .. read moreThank you for the read and review :) I suppose I pay more attention to how things sound rather than the technicalities, but is it is truly a disconcerting inconsistency maybe I should edit it. My thought was that "illumines" sounds better rhythmically. I was trying to be more descriptive in this poem than I usually I am, the focus was to create imagery and mood based on what I see when I open my window in the morning rather than to convey any sort of moral.
8 Years Ago
A little secret to poetry and writing things in English: When you know the rules, you're allowed to .. read moreA little secret to poetry and writing things in English: When you know the rules, you're allowed to break them if it creates something better.
This is what more poetry should be like. Vibrant, alive, like a flowing river reflecting back a beautiful gilded landscape at every bank. It's wonderful.
Question, why did you use (Illumines) the only third person references in your poem rather than Illuminating?
I like the concept and your descriptive lines are express and imaginative almost philosophical in nature, but I was disappointed with the ending expecting the building of your poem to explode with a moral impact ending. Still a very good poem and a pleasure to read, I give it four out of five Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!
Posted 8 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
8 Years Ago
Thank you for the read and review :) I suppose I pay more attention to how things sound rather than .. read moreThank you for the read and review :) I suppose I pay more attention to how things sound rather than the technicalities, but is it is truly a disconcerting inconsistency maybe I should edit it. My thought was that "illumines" sounds better rhythmically. I was trying to be more descriptive in this poem than I usually I am, the focus was to create imagery and mood based on what I see when I open my window in the morning rather than to convey any sort of moral.
8 Years Ago
A little secret to poetry and writing things in English: When you know the rules, you're allowed to .. read moreA little secret to poetry and writing things in English: When you know the rules, you're allowed to break them if it creates something better.
I grew up in the mountains of British Columbia. A lot of my inspiration is based in love, nature, societal issues, as well as my own emotional hurdles dealing with sexual abuse. more..