The Dark Days of My Path

Okay - I think you have a really great story to tell, and you use a lot of really dreamy, great imagery! But, the grammar makes it kind of hard to follow. Try composing your stuff in MS Word, and it will pick up a lot of the grammatical errors. Then copy and paste it into here, and voila! Grammar much better.

Posted 13 Years Ago

Loved this original story. Can't wait to see what happens next!~

Posted 13 Years Ago

Very very original, and very interesting. You have my attention, and you do quite well. Wonderful work. So very beautiful an idea, as well. Great start, please keep this going. The grammar and spelling could use a little work, but I'm sure you'll get the hang of it. After all, it is the core that truely matters. Lovely. ^_^

Posted 13 Years Ago

A very strong beginning. I like the detail description of each character. I like the discussion with God. The story had great possibilities. Great discussions and a interesting landing on earth. A excellent opening chapter.
Coyote

Posted 13 Years Ago

I do do it in Ms Word but it just leaves it the same so idk

Posted 13 Years Ago

Okay - I think you have a really great story to tell, and you use a lot of really dreamy, great imagery! But, the grammar makes it kind of hard to follow. Try composing your stuff in MS Word, and it will pick up a lot of the grammatical errors. Then copy and paste it into here, and voila! Grammar much better.

Posted 13 Years Ago