Remember

A small poem I wrote when returning to my hometown

The country roads go past in a blur as we go
Driving over hills and bridges I once used to know
There were once people who I loved and knew
I was little then, it was a long time before I grew
My skin is not pure as it was once before
It has been touched by a hundred or more
My sister who resides too far away
My grandfather who I'll see again one day
Boyfriends who I allowed and boyfriends who I did not
The parents who would prefer to leave me to rot
The teachers, the masters, the lecturers and friends
The co-workers, acquaintances the list never ends
My soul is not light as it was once before
It has been darkened by things that I saw
Things that I've done and refused to do
It's the later one that will really hurt you
Things like rape and horrible fights
Things like dark days and darker nights
My conscience is not clears as it was once before
The decisions I've made not above the law
I've stolen too much to ever be counted
Hearts I've broken and boys I have mounted
Items stolen and never returned
Letters I ripped and bridges I burned
My heart is not as together as it was once before
I have watched all the pieces tumble to the floor
One for the first lie I ever told
And again for every lie that turned my heart cold
The time I said I love you and didn't mean it
The time I disagreed with him and I was hit
My life is not as it was once before
That life I dream of travelling over the Moor
When life was simple and so easy to live
To have it back, a lifetime I would give
Gone are the memories I think of when lonely
The bodies of men and women I found so homely
Come back the sweetling I would like to be
The small child that I would prefer to call me

Reviews

[Dr. YumnaKay]

This feels so like me!
"The time I said I love you and didn't mean it
The time I disagreed with him and I was hit
My life is not as it was once before".
So true. We never grow up to be the same person we were before although how much we wish to reverse time. Good job!