Dear Mom...

About my real-life relationship with my mom.

It's not that I hate you
But I can't argue with the fact
That the way I behave, tells otherwise
And that leaves you to believe that

I failed you as your daughter
I did nothing to make you proud
I erased my individuality
I got lost in this crowd

I tried not to think over things
That I couldn't change for the better
I tried to overlook everything
Everything that possibly mattered

I am, but, your child
No one can deny this truth
Though I live a false life
But I can't be a lie to you

Don't you look at the tears
Or hear the screams that escape
The bleeding sorrow
My destiny; my fate?

Oh how I long for loving words
That you will utter, a few
For me, as I broke down
But was held by you

Oh mom, how I die every time I try
To tell you to stop stabbing my heart
With words meant for my betterment
You are tearing my soul apart

The life is getting hard on me
It seems as if I'm losing control
As I sit in the corner, lost in my dreams
Dreams of the beautiful times, before

I never wanted to be angry with you
I never wanted it to be this way
But I feel so helpless and this world
Has changed us both; what can I say

Please don't ever hate me
Because I can never hate you
I know you always loved me
And I know, I'll always love you...

Author's Note

The words popped themselves in my mind. I had to write something on the topic that has been bugging me for so long. I hope you like it. I was near tears writing this one. It's all that I want to say to my mother right now, maybe more...

Reviews

[*Kantola*]

Wow... so many contrasting statements, I LOVE IT! :)

I know what you mean by moms bugging you... Hypocrisy =/
I loved this piece! So much emotion packed into so little words. This was magnificent, Siya! I hope your problem resolves itself in some way or another. Fighting in your own house is not fun, especially when it's with someone that's older than you.
*hugs*

[lavina k.]

Amazing!!!!
I'm like shriveling after reading this.....!!!!

[Global Norskie]

Amazing! Can definitely relate to this (especially during my teens). Well written :)

[~lost and in my fantisi..]

very good!! your words all flow together and fit perfectly!!

[Takumoto]

Very expressive, and a perfect use for the art that is poetry. I felt the emotion in the words and enjoyed every line.