I won't ride it anymore

Ohk..now this is plain dumb...

I don't want to be rude

Just want to tell you the truth

I can't ride with you anymore

 

I've had enough of the fights

And the violation of traffic lights

I just can't take it anymore

 

I've felt my heart stop thumping

As the car started bumping

And suddenly screeched to a halt

 

I've seen you getting out

Loosing control among the fights and shouts

But I'm not saying that it's your fault

 

It's my own self that threatens me

Coz' there so much for my eyes to see

Except that the accidents you take us through

 

I'm happy with walking

And perhaps sweet talking

You're free to do what you want to do

Author's Note

I said 'ENOUGH'! I can write dumb poems too. Heere's an example. It says practicall nothing...ok...something...but not much like my other works. I wrote it after I came home from a ride with my Dad. Believe me, it's true....(I'm not being rude to anyone) Go easy on me an enjoy....

Reviews

[*~Imperfectly Me~*]

well i guess i'll go easy on you... it was a good poem....


Okay now i'm not going easy on you.... I thought it was a great poem that had a lot said in such little words... I know the feeling with the kind of car rides that just make you want to jump out in the end and hope you hit a tree and go splat and then die so you don't have to hear anymore of the arguing or see anymore of their dumb stupid things they do while driving.... yeah... sorry i guess i'm morbid at three am.... hmmm... Good job!

[jen -- JG]

Riding in a car with anyone who does silly things is scary and refusing to ride with them is NOT dumb! Neither is your poem. It shows you have sense and the maturity to say "enough"

Good for you!

The good thing here is that you have allowed your poem to fit anyone's feet. It could be be a parent, a friend, absolutely anyone.

The message is quite clear to me, take care or you'll drive on your own.

I like the way you have split each emotion and fear into a segment on its own.

You started with a staement, gave the reasons why and ended on a positive note.

I like this and think it should be printed out and sent to ANY driver who behaves this way behind the wheel of a car.

Well done.

[Connor]

Really like this, it flows from stanza to stanza, step by step :)
and as alternative_be said, writing your feelings like this, aint a dumb thing :)

[alternative_be]

Well, writing your feelings down like that, is not a dumb thing to do ...
However, the person that should read this, in my opinion, is your dad! But then again, would that be a safe suggestion?
On the other hand, I do not think this poem is dumb, maybe there are other reckless drivers around and I do hope they will read this and maybe they will reflect?

[Melaniespace]

i actually like this more then the one i just review. sounds like it would be a kick a*s hiphop song. but then again i turn everything into lyrics. no matter i write poems there almost always meant for music.