Weather Songs

A little something about weather and colours.

The wheels of time turn
each epoch into a new story
and looking out
the sun always finds
some new odds and ends of existence

these blue elastic days
stretch an empty story over the margins
vying for a drunken dream
and a burnt sky looks back
with a worried look
when small talk runs dry

the rain is silent when it comes
its presence felt only in
the softness left behind
and the green sings
a new song of remembered words

how can I possibly not sing along?

Author's Note

What do you think about the language? I tried keeping it easy and simple this time around, not forcing it to live up to the benchmark of 'poetic'.

And yes, thanks so much for reading! :)

Reviews

[Chryiss]

Certainly forcing oneself to be poetic is not optimal; however, it can be done. That aside, you were actually poetic in your language. I think what's considered poetic has a very large range though. I really liked your phrasing and voice. "some new odds and ends of existence" "these blue elastic days" "when small talk runs dry" These stood out especially to me for their personality and the blue days, the usage of elastic which adds an interesting layer to the imagery and sensations felt in the whole piece. All in all, it was a tranquil scene, but a lighthearted piece which wasn't constrained and flowed with character.

[Enigma]

Thanks so much for that wonderful review. I'm glad you liked it!

[Myenigma]

welcome back, Iv'e always liked your descriptions

[duck]

very effective and gentle. got aspects of the whether ie main theme of poem all time feeling gentle patter of rain.