"Walk"

Been awhile.. No longer the "teen" but I was going through some stuff. Still kinda am to be honest, I wrote this nearly two years ago. I've kept on writing since my hiatus on this site. Enjoy.

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Still not exactly/ what you could call "happy" but I'm through with being hung up on something that has long since died.

I don't need anyone to attain happiness. That's what she did and that's where me and her differ most. Still am feeling the color blue, red and green. 

Depression in waves with showings of pure undiluted rage, stuck and caught in between envy. 

I curse and just blurt as the wall sees the fist and blood hits my shirt, another day, another tomorrow. Oh how could this possibly get worse? 

Well funny enough that you should ask cause it did just that, All in the same week she hurt me now I was vulnerable and feeling meek so when I was told that sick news I was awestruck in dread as not even a full two days went by and I'm already being drowned in this family strife.

Couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. I could not dream, I was trapped within the confines of a flimsy reality that just didn't feel entirely real.

So many bad things hard to think that it was not all just fake, some poor lousy excuse for a joke or prank. 

Yet the laughter never came, the tears welled up and became loose as I beat my head down against the tables edge and cried for a lifetime of sorrow in only one morrow.

Like I said, I am far from happy but I am still going to continue to move cause I'm tired of these dumb emotions of pain only. 

This entire year will be the worse one so far, I'll bust into two with my tears by the near of winter break.

I will bleed from my heart again and the guts shall be spilt, left on the pavement no clue where they went because my confidence is not here yet.

So like all of the other things that have hurt me I'll just shrug it all off and just continue to-

Walk..

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Author's Note

Hopefully this was good, I have so many more poems I've written during this time frame, I will try to type and upload as many as I can this week. Please do tell me what you think of this one. Thank you.