Humanity (You're Gonna Carry That Weight)

Miscellaneous poem from around 2 years ago.

Humanity (You’re Gonna Carry That Weight)

 

Bury me, (no{body/one}),

Beneath your anchored {tree/heaven}

She sang, but the (black)

{Static/silence}; was deafening 

And all I heard was hollow

Like my own {echo/body}

Stretched out {drum-skin/like,}

The morning(s’) sun

Between {the/black} mountains of glass and steel; sky-scraping

At a blank canvas, we sang

[Dry wind; dead grass whistling with {split/desolate} lips]

As if it mattered (in the first place)

(We did[n’t])

This is my life

My struggle, I strangle hope

This is who I am

This is what I was

This is how I lived

(When I do, where I sing, why)

This man

This monster

Just this

Nothing [{else/but/this}]

You don’t know me

(You don’t know anything); at all

Except for, {maybe/these}, words

Lines on a human face;

Leading into distant paradise, lost

[Sketching perpetuality’s shroud;]

[Gallows camomile brown]

[Shallow boughs malleable enamel]

[Flowering Babel cowling valleys unravel gowns towelling plough hallowed galleries vow]

[Bronze collages tawny autumn]

[Cloudy palisades jade polymerization]

[Glade rays paving materializations]

Or a deaf sentence

Denying verticality’s decadent disassociation 

Descent depths decorating dresses

Drag drizzling deep disparity 

Disaster plastered pastures churn hernias;

Burgundy curtains mercury

Speaking of something better

Dreaming stupid(ly)

And optimistically blinded

By the light of the mirage’s dawn

Back when the sky glistened

With autumn {leaf/andromeda} 

And I was still young

(And) singing 

({Here/indestructible})

With you

Dead in a memory

Locked {in/deep} beneath

The bottomless ensemble 

[Watching on in {indifferent/silent} remorse; I realize]

You’re (long) gone,

Like {childhood/innocence}

And I find

I no longer {care-(to)/sing}

Because there’s nothing {out/in}

(Between) there, (and here)

Just silence

{She/her} {sang/song} {of/meant} {nothing/defeat}

I understood

Because, that’s what {I’ve/we’ve/she’s} become, (emptiness)

Hollow, mannequin 

Husk of the memory

Waiting for the end of the world

That won’t come {quickly/quietly}

({But/somehow}) the slow torturous sunset

Doesn’t (want to) know

[The ({slight/meaningless}) difference]

+[The provocation of this]+

+[The mockery, of this]+

(Forgivable,) neither do I

[I don’t remember {what/how} it {means/feels}

[To love; only pretend]

[Only (how to) forget]

Perhaps I have perfected

The ability to numb myself to every pain

To the point where I am

Scarcely even living, terrestrial, real

[I lament]

[In recompense, in cognition of this]

[Her non-euphoric paranoid existence, doesn’t (seem to) deserve their (Rorschach) memory]

Letting go {is/so} much more difficult than holding on

Strangling anemoia

There was beauty here,

An open field fragile [(hands)

Grasping at (the) straws]

Ravaged by the (blood) battalion of

{Stars/crucibles} (forged) hanging overhead

Tranquil quilted acrylic sigils

Cerulean wither slithering ribbons 

[Stitching lithium riptide leviathan; irises wire fibrous abyss]

Now a prison; reality, 

[You ruined it all]

[(I give no sympathy)]

Yet no true response

To the noise of, the unheard dilapidation of

[Corrupted image]

[Contorting beauty; into me]

You make me, you do, brother, stronger, better, morbid, more

Decay braiding bays beige suede Himalayas waves frayed paper scintillating

Gazing parades everglade layers-paisley pages tearing apothecary

Transmogrified tides kaleidoscope

Unwinding bibles fibrous Gaia Nihilism prism obsidian linen tingeing equilibrium

Roping opal photographic blackness; rapids taffeta overlapping brass

Saplings gelatinous molasses

Aspens bending assemblage dawn tawny bronze monoliths twisting chiffon

Windows smashed into a million pieces

Of colourless obsidian 

Draped in the silent tides;

Her capsized eyes sunrise;

Blasphemous cacophony masquerading 

Pale Sol exfoliating orb incorporeal

Oranges; torn accordions

*Forming contorting cork metamorphosis*

{We/she/I} {were/was} (t)here

Once what remains

[{Real/fictional/unconscious here}]

Doesn’t mean anything, at all

She sang

The easy way out is never having

{Loved/lost/lived}

Such gambles against our {intrepid/pitiful} existence

Are {futile/inconsequential/medial/mediocre/madness}

And meaningless

Yet the sun rises;

And gives itself, to the moon

And the clouds stalk each other

Through a pincushion sky;

Perforating transmogrification

Meadows glisten with precipitation;

From greens drowning whites

[Forming full]

The halfway realizations of this world

The restless passing mornings

(I’ve deathlessly deliberated through)]

But the song continues

Even as the past echoes dully

Even as the men smoke cigars;

And the women put on lipstick 

Even as the flags flutter;

And the green field stands [at attention]

Humming ([hungry] the[ir]) anthems ([of their hubris, of] their wars)

Trumpeting onwards into oblivion

Without {stop(ping)/understanding/knowing;}

[anything else]

The tequila molasses

As it stretches out into black taffeta, phosphorous droplets

Doesn’t care

Hello, is anyone there?

We are {nothing,/no} one

Come to stand the test of timelessness; frayed

Smiling at the abyss as it smiles back with black teeth

[Life], call it [(a liar) for] what it is+

Watching the curtain fall like a bent coin

Heads, tails, or neither

Does it really {matter/say}?

Rusted sunsets custard brushing tufts

Lustre constructing musculature 

Seams Elysium peeling cathedrals

Teal helix cedars congealing

Beacons brim dimly stygian

Onyx [tinge linen] condominiums

Field ethereal clearings

Piers mural speleothem 

Vortex effigy weaving teaks

Bleached ecru sheets terpsichorean+

Trailing on across the page

Like {empty/bullet} hollow words

Like a body hits the dirt; flowerbeds genesis

Grounded root 

Tearing through the sediment 

Reddish rhododendron, entrails

Maelstroms golden portraits

Orchestras metamorphosing 

Airborne bullet train;

Tracks loaded with a bouquet of {bulbs/mosaic}+=

Pomegranate amber tambourine

Gangrenes beaded eden seams weaving 

Walking down a

{Steep/straight} line into hell

[She sang <my name

(As it splintered into her

{Hands/mouth}

Like a lost lyric

Who are you that do not know your history?

I watched them dance

Around the campfire; dead men still living

And wondered why

Not knowing when to put down the(ir) {flag(s)/gun(s)/memories}

[Wondering why]

Under thunder cracked crystalline

Chrysalis crested crescents, singing

As if I could hear the forgotten

{Past/echo} through a spiral ear

As if I knew the difference, or cared for that difference 

Whispering of yesterday

As (if) I remembered, as if I knew

Of them

([Must] they kill themselves)

(For {incomprehensible/immeasurable})

({Victory/defeat}[?])

[Must] they dig

Their own graves with their bare hands[?]

God does not break his {silence/promises}+=

Or if he does; I fear I cannot {hear/understand} {it/him}

In {the/this} {cool/quiet} autumn wind

The easy way out is never having heard

The cacophony in {silence/stillness}

The echo in uncertainty 

The coldness within warmth

The[y] want for something more

Than the flesh;

More than {desire/decay}

The sickness

I loved her, I did

But I couldn’t {truly/bring/love} myself

So she left me

For the (boneless) dogs

Now I (am) just (a[nother]) dream;

[Nameless nightmare]

Of never waking up wandering

And the world turns like a broken swing 

Under an oak tree[’s]

Rusted hinge

[In the crumbling wind]

[I watch it turn]

Dusted by dusk’s dim disappearing shadow; an outstretched hand, (reaching out to nothingness)

And I remember all

Duvets of hazel angels grazing on dawn auburn

Derailed halos glow gold

Locked door leading through

The {warped/crevice/frame} of a second, bent into rusted irons

And the happiest things

Have (ever) been; ferments into {this/s**t}

And I am drunk off

My own spit;

And high off my own fumes

(And) yet still, she sings (to me)

({Beautiful/ugliness}) ({ill/remedy})

If only, (but) a shadow

(Of her [{halfway/house/self/lost]})

Lengthening in the light 

Hiding from our own nature, our inability to identify meaning, until it passes 

My sanguinity to know love; only when it passes

An oasis we leave behind in the {dust/dirt/desert} of our lives

The marching band, marches

Pianos play

The quiet screams; but I refuse to listen

The song doesn’t stop to listen to itself-or-watch-as-the-note-stretches-out-scrawled-across-pages

Isn’t {this/that} ({reality/merely}) awful?disoriented-fentanyl-pencil-strewn-through-blue-dream

(Unhinged) instruments of-lost-memory-enveloping-skeleton

{Surrender/war;} faceless

Soloists in the crowd

Blow themselves

(Out of proportion;) into frenzy dancing with god in the streets[sobering into a moments dream]

Everything else, muffled,

Voiceless chaos’s

{Conductor/ventriloquist}

Awaiting {the/this/her/my/our}

{Next/last/few/final}

{Note/page/chapter/moments/curtain/movement}

Looking on in

(Damned/demented/drugged/dim)

{Dissociation/anticipation/dispassion} for

When all {the/my} world {was/is} {still/silent} 

[Caged] between the picture frame

Motionless words dressed

In {black/white/suits} forever

Rip (back the ragged film)

In the fabric of history 

Whatever happens, (here), happens

It all was {and-is/as}

{Meaningless(ly)/nondescript/absurd/abstract/mad}

As (the) morning rain

{Nonsensical/static;} A blind maelstrom

Of words that meant something

To someone, (lost/buried/abandoned/idle/[alive]) at some point, (squandered) somewhere (else)

{Lost/forgotten} left behind

{Like/in} an ink (pitch) image

Rorschach on a white page 

A wall of slick black; dribbling

Into the gutter watercolour 

Gelato constellation 

Painting dilapidated chapels in rays of hazel defibrillators 

Speaking to itself; shadow incarnate,

Dull and iron cold incarnate

As if if matters

It doesn’t

It never [really] {will/did}

And {I’m/you’re} [nobody] {still/not} listening

It’s freedom; that’s what

{This/it} {poetry/is} [{for/to} me]

{That/this} quintessence

She sang

{She/what} might have been (once)

I too; will {cry/crawl}

My way home someday

In a dream, 

Maybe

The quiet screams the truth;

But I refuse to listen

Singing (on and on) like a record on repeat;

Dialling back

The cranked {hymns/hummed/hinge} of an eardrum 

Opening a door into the broken minds’ torn

{Canvas/cavernous/carrion} cell

Esophagus blossoming cottony phosphorus

Eclipses crystal glyph shapeless

It means little; sculpting,

Frescoing the formless oceans

Around us

Acorns accordions torrents

Fleury corduroy’s pouring oily portraits 

A forest of deadmen; drawing

On the walls; painting oasis’s

[Without colour]

Where they can [hang (their heads)]

[(In my {dead/departed} brook)]

It’s nothing new, really

Just a going, each {one/[of} us] faces [it] alone

[You don’t know me;]

[That {silence(‘s)/festering/stillness}]

Still doesn’t mean {much-(of)/anything}

To those that know no better 

To the roads that lead nowhere

To the valleys and the canyons

At war with the rain

To the umbrellas ripped at

Like a scab by the wind

To the cars that pass by

(Like sentences) on the {blank/lined} pages of a highway

To the drift of an autumn leaf;

As it plunges into the open sky[’s eye(s)]

To the endless abyss [hanging crooked]

Over the cliff of a city street 

To the obsidian sun as it sits dormant

In its velvet vinyl sky

Crescendoing on past oblivious

*<=[(Or) to {them/you/us/me/her/(or)-anyone},

(Here, now)]

[At all]

[As selfish as we are, we few, [who knowingly refuse to listen]

Stubborn, unable

To hear anything 

But ourselves 

Still; she {sang/sings}

To stubborn mindless men;

Making their way, past

Like crows on telephone cables;

[Electrified (mechanical cogs)] 

<An echo of an echo;

Groaning into the dull [hull

{Lulling/(of)}] silence that I am>

Watching reality, turn

[For who else will greet me;

Underneath that (hollow) {tree/heaven}?]

Molasses taffeta photographic pastures

Wax rapids gelatinous jasper

Caskets blacken rafts asphodels enveloping yellow petals emerald

Waiting for that big {empty/hole}

To {be/remember(ed)} {full/something}

So I can take my place;

Among those broken {promises/sentences}

I couldn’t {keep/write} again

And sing to her

([{Time/silently}] slowly) fading into obscurity

Wind whistling through blue;

Grasses elastic lasso Picassos 

Branching on the fringe frayed sidewalk blotching chalk

Apostle gospel gouache blossoming

Arrases knot kaleidoscopic cloth

A bluejay {on/in} the {wind/rain}

Perched branches; hanging

Leaves of ruddy varicoloured smother

{As/selfish;} {if/we}

{We/-few-/who} {knew/refuse} to listen

The orchestra continues on

But I can’t hear a thing

It is nothing 

Her voice

Just as mine

A single note, {playing/together}, in the rain; rusted by the rain

What we have become

Doesn’t mean anything anymore 

At all 

But I don’t care 

[Nothing really matters]

[Here]

Not the hands of a clock

Fast approaching the same 24 hours

Not the people who refuse

To see themselves 

For what they are

In an empty mirror

Not the wind as it whistles

Through tree limb teeth

Not the sun looming overhead in red parthenogenesis 

Gone in a moment 

I cannot see their (unsound) beauty as anything more than {infinitesimal/defective}

[Flawed]

And worthless 

Still; I try to love what cannot love me

And hate those who cannot see the clearcut difference 

Between love and insanity 

Do you?

I remember the sound of singing; as (blearing) deafening as silence

Bleeding through my eardrum;

Rorschach cacophony 

{Figures/mouths}

Screaming something to each other;

(Garbled, refractory) tattered, senselessly.

Echoing on

Past the limits of a balcony; or a long empty road

Beyond white picket fence

And broken chainlink 

[Vicariously]

{I/she/we} {cannot/can’t} (seem to) recall {the/her} (exfoliating) words

[(Even if I listened)]

Words like empty buildings; their twisted picture; [bent skeletons sculpting themselves] in the

[Split] frame of a-[finite] second

Or crumpled paper on the wind,

Tumbleweeds of men

Reaching out to god

And finding numb dank chaos

Finding irony; rejection 

As he sits in his padded cell;

Alone, unspoken to

Words forming the end of a line into a red hemorrhaging heaven

Such is shameless reality

We are little more than dreams

[Gaps rapture’s’ tapestry unwrapping

Rapids daffodil chapel gilded swill silver;

Slithering capillaries quilted

Vermilion still bougainvillea]

[Rings of bangled dandelions

Formaldehyde kaleidoscope; opal topaz]

The cruelty of simple chance lost in cause and effect and

A coin toss; flipped 

I watch the world turn inside-out;

And spit back the tongue of flame 

+That gave it providence+

Icarus shapeshifting hieroglyphics

Sanskrit ichor; pitch lithium nickelling 

Scabs avalanching chrysanthemums

Blanch antlers emerge fern tourniquet 

[The earth(s){swallow/follow}{themselves/itself}back from the ledge over gumdrop apocalypse]

Docking moksha Rakshasa flocked monolith precipitation; chain creation 

Simplicity decorates it’s decadent canals,

[Yell] channels of intricate vacancy

Dripping from the carcass of a kaleidoscope eye

[Sculpting the gilded sun like clay in our formless hands]

Blinded by the colour we were

Stupid causality; like an elevator [shaft]pulling itself {down/up}

From the depths of this heart

Their own antithesis which

Says little

Means nothing 

Tingeing imagery rhythms’

Photosynthesis rinsing incubus mist skipping 

Dreams peeling ceilings

Green margarine helix onyx onomatopoeia

Singing its own way down

Into the entrails of a humanoid hell

The bowels of our infrastructure

Our incompetent greed for things we cannot have or know

Deeper; down into the hidden meaning we despise 

But ({I/you/we}) know

{I/we} {am/are}, {I/we} {am/are}, {I/we} {am/are}

Singing, not listening

Carrying 

That weight

That boulder 

Like Sisyphus into the depths

Of our despair; the unknown absurdity 

Of our incognizant lives

Bring ourselves up the mountain 

For what?

Asking 

Why?

Starting again 

From the {foundation/bottom} of {that/the}mountain 

{Alone/tired}

Unspoken to

[{Listening/and}] not waiting

For {the/an} answer 

Blind visionaries; viewing an abyss of spirals

Staircase leading nowhere 

Down, [down] into [leathery] darkness

Damnation

Dandelions, daphnes, dahlias 

Crawling through the centrifuging universe of pursed lips

Crows perching on broken limbed branches

Cawing into the sound of stillness

At the twisted shapeshifting effigies of nothing

Like wallpaper, hanging from bone and brick

Continuing on

Forward into the backwards halls darkening oblivion 

Shells of men; metamorphosed 

Bubbling up like edifices from sediment 

Storm of a cornea

Stretched out like tents

Of empty magenta penitentiaries 

Frayed edge of a sentence

Overlooking onyx opaque orchards orchestral ostracization of oxidizing obsolete open oak oasis

Born accordions corduroy void oil portraits amorphous

Polaroid coiling violas golden corona

Foliage bridging ridges smudge sunburned colour ruddier

Smother doves penumbral tongue

Beyond the page stripped from the fringe 

Presses orchestral maleficent intestines;

Instruments print inkblot ribbon

Of meaning

I thought I heard someone; once

She sang of nothing

[{Crack/foot} between the door at the crosswalk {of/to} {existence/creation}]

{Spilling/gilded} cerulean

[Slipping through illuminating grey faces ray misshapen acreage]

[Acrylic sigil Sol gladiolus]

[Polaroid coiling corduroy void;

Golden souls’ embroidery

Oily quartz portraits]

[Scotch faucet blotches]

[Through centrifuging moons; ]

[Tuning-ukuleles,-ladles-scooping-roofs-of-chartreuse-lucid-fuchsia-sutras-in the-halogen-fog]

[Aeons-transmogrification-(pause-crawling-balsam-embalming-blonde-dawn)]

I heard it {crawl/spill}-vermillion-hills-of-mildew

Bloom-through an open ear

[Like silence might speak]

[It had no mouth]

[Picking at its lips;

She knows now; deep Sol; clandestine]

Shrapnels black gouache arrases;

Pasturing grasses apple tapestries

[Gelato froze oaken lotus posies sown

Golds ambrosially motionless abyss]

[Bitten by the hand that feeds]

[We {ate/cannibalized} our words (these low hanging fruits of our labour)]

As if it made a difference 

A mind torn from its hinges [open like a tree-hollow, (reaching out)]

A prison cell adorned [with one way mirrors]

[(Abandoned in the glare of a mourning son, blinded by the salvation of emptiness, hollowness)]

[Drowning {black(ness)/ambition} on the sharp(nel) edge of a moon;]

[Cut from {the/its} tie-dyed-wide-eyed-skies]

[Rhythmic schism linen gin photosynthesis blossom clock arras gouache octaves blotch crossing]

A body of words-that-hurricane-frayed-grey-faded-pasting

Scaling the grafted gap lap mapping dilapidated {maze/pages} [paved in glazed tinge;]

[Bays of serrated transmogrification]

Stitching nickel 

Embroidering foliage

Gilded lilies

[Crisscrossing Cocytus

Blotched clockworks sakura

Mock scotch arrases]

[Windblown pages cage oasis

Glyphs crystal viscous mithril]

Left {beneath/behind}

{Static/oscillating} form blown out of

[Gowns bowels gouged torches

Amorphous] proportion 

Pillowing sigils silhouettes

Dress crepuscular nectar blossom phosphorescent  

[Graffitied murals cathedrals peeling helixes abyss crystal mithril]

[Acrylic willows swivelling

Chisel whittling Sol exfoliating maples]

Ruddier suns uncovering

Cluttering summits tongue

Moving shapelessness

[Mosaic tapestry arrases cast

In asphalt salt convulsing]

[Lines leading elysian into the distant sunset outstretched]

[Arms of carousel caramel

Yellow bells meld umbrellas, envelope cello]

Laurels of petals evangelical shedding nether reddish Armageddon 

Following diabolical diaphragms

Trumpeting doves thundering plums umbra

Singing one

As if it meant anything at all

Contorted images blindly look

Through black leatherback names

Rivulet zephyrs sepulchre

Incandescent nest orchestra etching crescents

Bethels knell swelling bells

Dwelling [yellows] parhelion [dawn]

(Pneuma, By Tool:)

“We are born of one breath, one word

We are all one spark, sun becoming

Pneuma

Reach out and beyond

Wake up remember

We are born of one breath, one word

We are all one spark, eyes full of wonder”

+Entwined; we dream waking+

+As the engines stall+

As the trees sway

As the cosmos shift

As the fingers twist like outstretched branches reaching towards an absent {sun/voice}

As the telephone lines connect the neighbouring houses

Watching {the-hour(of-our)/existence}

{Bend/wither/turn}

+Locked inside my head with no way out+

I love no one but myself; and so one loves me

The frayed edge of us dissolving back in(to) the nothingness from which we came

(Dinosauria, We, By: Charles Bukowski:)

“Awaiting the next chapter”

Despite the world we left {behind/buried}

(In [the] {dust/sands/waves})

She sang

Sitting in his padded cell alone,

Unspoken to

Listening as colour spills through his oily ear

[Unloved, unknown;]

[A blind man lost in this unforgiving rain ({of/his} existence)]

[Singing with the rain]

[From a kaleidoscope window]

[Medicated only by his madness]

[And the shadow on the wall]

[The man smiles]

[Leaking (lead, hemlock), phosphorus, {red/rust} {neon/dust} (dyed) void]

[The swansong, the effigy]

[The pulse, the epilogue]

*[The knife, the king]*

[The end and the beginning]

[An echo of the truth]

[To be or not to be]

[Staring blankly in the face of God and knowing this]

*Knowing there is this*

[Only this, just this]

[Made by this, tainted by this]

As windows stare

Into the depths of oblivion 

As the green grass grows

Closer to {the/an} absent truth

As the geese migrate

From the dead corpse

Of Canadian winter

As a caged falcon

[Cl]aims to walk the-cherry-pie-cheese-cake moon

As the river pulses with life like a[n] {vein/artery}-ready-for-the-needle

As the earth grows with rocky moss

Injected with the bloodlust of a labouring tide

Fed by the ombre of oak stitches

In the deliberation of death

As dark sky sits cross legged in its madness [open armed, intoxicated, (injecting light into itself)]

The hand of the clock reaches for salvation 

It reaches for {freedom/humanity}

It reaches for certainty, [or uncertainty]

[Made maddened, crazed,

And scarred by this]

[Made silenced by this]

[Caged by this]

[Bound by this, shackled]

*Made {beaten/tired} and sick {by/from} this*

[Forged by this, born by this, shaped by this, (of this, merely this)]

[Made cornered and shamed by this]

[(This) boundless night]

[This alarm]

[This clockwork]

[The reaching of the elongated fingers of trees]

[For the heavens’ depths]

[Husking the corn from black sky and dirt]

[The perpetual twisting (spoon) spinning vortex (etched) of the sun and stars]

[Nothing but this]

[Waiting]

[{Made/torn} for this]

*[Scorned for this]*

*Shouting mantras to purgatory [echoing {off/against} the(se) four great walls]*

[Watching the {black/white} eclipse]

As it melts downhill

Like (hued) slop into the sewer grate]+=

Locked between the branding paisley

Of cells like barcode labels

Scanned by the infinite horizon

[Blotches sarcophagus blossoming arras

Toft cottony flocking gelatinous]+=

[Words forming a line

To await the period

At the end of their sentence]

[Cease to be {anyone/anything} at all]

[A story above

The {barred/lettered} foundation]

[Torn off like a blindfold

From the yellowed crumpled page]+=

We become this

Know this

Addicted to this

Lust for this

Raped by, murdered by, soothed by this

We question [this]

Debilitated, deformed in our own defilement by this

(Rain, By: Charles Bukowski:)

“[The man sits in the night in the rain]”

“There’s something wrong with him, isn’t there, right?”

He’s got {nowhere/somewhere} (left) to go,

Or {somewhere/nowhere}

(Maybe){somewhere/nowhere} left to {run/be}-to

Does he not know this?

Does he not fear this?

Does he not love this madness; this godless cynical religion?

Does he not live for {this/death}?

This love, this infectious disease of violent humanities

Fighting to the death

Among a meadow of violets

He is this; has he not become this? Lived through this, understood this madness? Believed in it?

=+[He {doesn’t/knows}

{Know/no(thing)} better]

[Watching the orchestra,]

[Turning]

[Cogs in the machine]

[The music box]

[Singing love is a lie]

[Of freedom impeding on another’s freedom]

[Free falling voice; echoing

Down into the (shallow) depths below]

It’s almost funny how horrible life is to itself; eating away at the bones just to grow new ones

[Crossing the static channel;

Wringing in the depths of a pupil abyss; washed in the phosphorous of the city lights

Ear canals, commercial vessels]

[Radio waves drown sound [amalgam flowers ballad ravelling downy clouds cowl bowels-towel]

In pastured black cacophony]

[Ringing rhythm church bells (swell gold magnolias accordion)]

[The steps of man; childlike, curious]

[Shamble back into one]

Into this, [a single note rises (franticly)]

[(Drawn like a rogue {phantom/wave})]

[(From {nothing/something})]

[(Made by this unmade by this, and, listening in emptiness)]

[We whisper, to the desperate wind and the whittling waters and the elastic earth, and]

[All {she/he/I} {left/heard}

({She/he/I} {left/heard}) alone]

{Dying/daring} to truly be alive

*Tortured by this*

{Lost/masked/broken}, [by this]

Amidst the noise

Playing in the dark with no real need for light

Dancing the [cluttered] waltz with no [real] {reply/answer}

(Dinosauria We, By Charles Bukowski:)

[“Born out of that”]

[“The sun still hidden there, awaiting the next chapter”]

(Rain, By: Charles Bukowski:)

“He came to hear the music”

[He came {out/to}

Echo the word of our stagnant]

[{Nature/godlessness/incomprehension}]

[To hear {ones/his} own voice]

[Drawn out deeply]

[From the other {side/end}]

[So you can take {these/my} raggedy words]

My empty nest, my colourless skies

In a single brushstroke’s bristled breath; canvases dressed in perpetual nectar opalescent etching

[Tomorrow], is still waiting, alone [for ({you(rself/me/us}

To find it, there, in perpetual motion

[{And/so}(remember) listen to the emptiness that I call my heart-rhythm beaten into submission]

Because I don’t even feel a thing

Yet still remembering,

The bygone days of youth

That lay before me like a casket;

Still smiling singing on like a bluebird

As if I could hear them scream

For some form of silence

As if the entropy of their mumbles

Could fill the empty heads

Of a hundred men

This gift I had given to you, once

Whole as the dead crystalline moon

The empty, that you made full

The body of my words buried by the dirt;

Waxing and wanning,

Forming, amorphously, shaping

Rusting into gold exfoliation;

Laced with basins of gin pomegranate labyrinths

Skimming Olympian rhythm

Wind hymns of trimmed deliberation,

Dim discombobulated dismal debilitating dahlia daisies

Daunting dawn drumming digeridoo daffodils

Duvets of dates dilapidating doom;

Duties dubbed doodling dubious druids

Fumes illuminating bruised tombs of pewter union

Dandelion irises pyres violet spin

Infinity strings mandolin pushpin

Cushion crooked books inukshuk

Crochet page into equilibrium

Running sundered umbra

Plummeting down into the mountains

Gouging out the cyan eye

Of formaldehyde tides

Of widening Poseidon’s ivory iris

Piling wildfire chimera

Perishing in the glare of scintillating sun

Running thunder flowing

Supernova clovers

Roads of soma posies unfolding lotus gladiolus crocuses

Draining creased steeples

From the beacon of the moon

Writhing sirens

Blend Armageddon reddish [entrails halo maelstrom golden glens pen-parthenogenesis]

Cemeteries barricading oasis [lacing]

From the eyes [tied]

Hyacinth blinds unwinding; [watching the {dotted/knotted/coil} {forest/sky} untie kaleidoscope]

Diving into asylums

Of ivies piles

Islands of violins

Caged in chains

Biege braids

Serenading caves

Shading oasis

Fading into the sinew

Of blue bibles

Rising from the depths

Opalescent breath

Crepuscular zephyrs

Of cloth nocturne clockwork

Circles herculean

Moonbeam Eden weaving

Beads of the seventeenth

Sea tumbleweed ebony

Feathered embedded nebula

Tethered rhododendrons

Mending nether petals ebbing Serengeti

Blotched phosphorous knotting

Bottomless {eclipse/glyph}

Ricocheting grey bouquets;

{Wading/paving} {Salem/Hades}

Nightengale glades fading ukulele

Tailing azaleas halos

Maelstrom moulding

Foliage corduroy embroidery; ores metamorphosis, chords fleury charcoal gold

Laurels envelop

Ravelling amalgamate

Moulding ocean waves

Glades daisies frayed

By the fringe of

Frigid photosynthesis

Ribboning lindens

Tenebrous gold

Nature’s basins acreage

Acrylic sigils willow gilded silver pillar

Exfoliating flow

Gaudy onomatopoeia weaving

Oil portraits orchard

Porridge florins

Opening cornucopia

Topaz labyrinths

Stitching glyphs of eucalyptus

Shapeshifting wicker

Flame glazed pages

Avalon gondala; polymer golems swallowing halogens

Porcelain amorphous

Incorporeal orb, coiling around gilded crown;

Belladonna august

Polymerizing

Gaia’s rhinestone

Vinyl pines

Stitching pixelated

Creationism

Thunder-clapping raptures

Grasping tapestry jasper

Taffeta rafts of

Gelatinous black glass rapids;

Apples oar torn corridors forests

Florin coral forming

Storm phantasmagorical

Orchards metamorphosis bliss into sinew bloom

Ruby pewter chartreus typhoon

Orange voila

Schism rivulets etch outstretched arms of yarn across the gouache sakura blossoming clot arrases

(Bluebird, By: Charles Bukowski:)

“And it's nice enough to make a man weep,”

“But I don't weep, do you?”

 

 

 

Silently [Listening To Nobody]

 

Mosaic pages tornados maple

Gate Beowulf polymerization grapefruit 

Pharaoh composing rouge pandemonium;

Clothed in gin photosynthesis 

Riptide glyphs edifices

Eclipses hydrangeas lithium mithril gilded

Pavilions vermilion swilling

Bougainvillea wilt acrylic silk silhouette

Pillowing willows squiggly

Sigil amaryllis quilt milquetoast lotus 

Solar corduroy void golden

Embroidery mold orange phantasmagorical 

Blueberry aquarium ferrying

Alstroemerias; flare parasol laurels velvet

Lumber rotunda smothering covers

Thunderous oneness ruddied button budding sunlight 

Champagne suede paisleys maelstrom

Gold photographic mask daphne 

Aegises abyss whiskey lithium shapeshifting nickel pixies cream

Creased ether seamstress cedar

Leaf eden’s martinis green mausoleum 

Petunias lunar parachuting hues

Of fuchsias cumulus duvet 

Bleached beacon peeking teaks leaf

Grease terpsichorean sheets

Smouldering golden polaroid corduroy,

Oars tornado embroidering void;

Coiling foliage; portrait

Amorphous anthropomorphic quartz 

Porcelain yolk, orchestra;

Orchid metamorphosis, fleury porridge,

Coral chlorophyll portrait orchard shores curl form boreal

Phantasmagorical; Sol’s pandemonium 

Forest boreal torches

Florins bourbon torrent orbs Ouroboros 

Roses cloak apotheosis swollen

Groves photo topaz lotus

Lavenders pattern splattering avalanche chrysanthemum

Branching out evangelicalism 

Slithering rivers sigil ridges photosynthesis;

Linen obsidian tinge imprisonment

Acrylic quilts gilded silver

Orange chlorophyll chiselling cerulean 

Polymerizing transmogrified ivory

Wine vinyl dime kaleidoscope 

Opal oak roping Orpheus

Uncorked torquing vortex ecstasy 

Geraniums paint

Defibrillation mosaic braids

Wade through blue

Entombed centrifuging aluminum

Parachute juniper hue

Jewelry pewter lunar communications 

Bulbous cauldrons drawing

Auburns scarves carving bark escarpments 

Rays parading beige’s paisleys

Ravens gates maze scintillating bays crochet 

Ukuleles pale tornado unfolding molten

Amber dandelions vinyl lamp

Lantern anchor chrysanthemum tongue

Thunderous covers rug penumbra

Lumbering plum plummeting sun

Bungalow tome osmosis oceans’

Sol corona disrobing lotus

Orbiting thorns contortionist

Abyss eclipsing glyph riptides dye

Heineken gin photosynthesized papyrus

Eye kaleidoscope mocha crocus

Foam chromosomes chrome photo

Groaning oceans creaking creases

Streaming weave ribbons tinging

Equilibrium seamstress outstretched prism

Amaranth labyrinth pink

Idiosyncrasy rinsing blinking ink symphony 

Limestone bibles spiral pyres

Fibrous spiders Nihilism ciders string 

Crimson lindens binging

Incendiary parasols dissolve; folded golden 

Roads close opening dopamine

Forest orange porous quartz torque

Coiling magnolia roll

Their anthropomorphic torched orchards’ morgue

Roaring torrents hallucinogenic

Assemblage palms cauterized the sky 

Ivory diamonds collapsing

Blackness masks pastures blur; grey

Fading railroads exfoliate acreage (torn world) primordial hatred

Glazed oasis variegated paints; laurels coral fleury porridge Ouroboros, phantasmagorical 

Nickel pistol; bristled conifers

Twists pitches extinguishing tinge

Millennium cinnamon schisms

Sigils whittling string

Crackling obsidian 

Magma latticed branches

Slathers canvases evanglevist Styx eclipse

Pixels sickling ring

Entangling bangles rattle cavernous lavenders

Oily turquoise’s portrait brick Omnipotence’s; cities rhythm linen

Clearcut brushstrokes lustre

Rustling custard construct percussion flush

Frescoed Sol coronas ambrosial

Photograph mapping black alabaster 

Taffeta unwrapping rapids baptism

Saplings patchwork gelatinous glass

Talisman candles brambling

Hands clouding bowels cowling amalgam

Boughs valley palisading

Transmogrification; lagers bronzing gauze polymer

Green terpsichorean streams snake

Opaque liquidated matrix etch

Crepuscular breath; nocturnal inferno, halos tornado through bloom

Luminously centrifuged broomstick cumulus

Onyx sycamore forge boreal

Corroded symbiosis frozen over clover

Soma motionless torchlit

Hydrangeas adrift flickering

Lithium whisking theistic wicker chrysalis 

Ponds andromeda gobbling

Cobblestone Sol cloaking token metamorphosis 

Inukshuk brooks booklets

Drenched entrails pencilling rings stygian 

Figs bridging orphanages of linden

Slithering unhinged oblivion

Squiggling symbols chiselled gold polaroids;

Primrose rouge viola broiling

Stringing calligraphy slithering thin

Tendrils emerald, pretzeling empty 

Ravel enamel bowels bouquet volcano

Golds smouldering suede beige tornado

Crochet daisy’s hazel trailing maelstrom Sol; pale azalea

Confetti machete tarnished eclipse

Abyssal glyphs lithium pitch; twisted stitches

Whiskey bristled nickel Styx:

Pixel sycamores forest amorphous

Coursing through a porcelain moon;

Monsoon parachuting plume maroon cumulus

Transfusing luminous ballooning ludicrous blooming pews of chartreuse petunias

Painting oasis across the pages

Lacing grape constellations opaque gaping

Napalm mandala college auburn tar

Shrapnel rapids taffeta rafts aspens resin denim reverends penning nebulous

Treading eleven tenement heavens assemblage

Bending lemon entrail halo

Tendrils emerald stencil pretzelled bottomless cogs autumn bronze

Dawn transmogrified spirals kaleidoscope

Chiffon driftwood viscus mithril gilded silvers

Author's Note

Most of my poems can be differing lengths depending on the time you want to spend reading them. You can avoid reading anything brackets, or read it all. If you want an in-between, you can read only the ( ) brackets, or ( ) and [ ], or ( ) [ ] and { }, or all these mentioned brackets including < >, or these brackets all the way up to >( )<, and finally, up to - - or -< ->. There are other symbols I use, like “=” or “+” as well, or even other symbols, these are for parts of the poem that are least important, and may be skipped more easily. It must be in this order though if you wish to read some of the brackets. Obviously the more brackets you read, the longer my poems will be. The purpose of this is simply to allow leniency in how long or short you want the read to be. The lines in grey are particularly optional. This is not a way to ruin art in order to string in more readers, nor am I doubting a reader's capabilities to understand, or even how much they're willing to read. It is much more something where I simply do not know whether I consider these extra words be the core, and see them in a sense of not entirely understanding whether I consider them "canon", as they often change the flow of the piece, for better or worse, when or when not they are included. In a way, making it a completely different poem, as is their intention in a way, to add more, and to sculpt words differently. Think of these added brackets and words as the fat of the piece, rather than the bones.

Read in the order you please.

I should also mention my newer poems use slashes "/" and brackets around those slashes { / }

This basically means that you can either read that line with the words on the left of the slash only, the words on the right of the slash only, or, rarely, a combination, or all three. It's a situational thing, that can bring freshness to a poem you've read before, and gives me the chance to have multiple ways of writing a poem instead of just 1.

Finally, all works I reference have {an/the} artist and work mentioned, with a line through them like this which, will be followed or after a line in parentheses, “like this” You won’t find these in all my works, just my newer ones. Within the quote, I will often add to it. Those additions to the quote will be within some brackets of some sort, and make the quote a mix between two voices, mine, and the quote’s original writer.